I don't like myself

[SerpentSun]

Why didn't I visit here earlier today?

I have a great life. It used to be a lot worse, I used to beg God not to let me wake up in the morning, and I'd cry everytime I stared into the mirror to see a monster looking back at me. But my life got so much better this year.

Except now, the bad days I do have feel so much darker after the luxury of living in the light. Today was one of those dark days. If I was off in the woods, out half-freezing to death with only a fire to keep warm, I'd honestly be so much happier. But I'm in the city until spring, staying with my mother-in-law to help after her surgery. And oh how miserable I've been today!

I have no advice to give, but I can sympathize with how you feel. A lot of folks seem down today, both in the forum and "real life", but at least this community has a way of uplifting the spirits. Maybe even ghostly kind of spirits.

Haha I'm so grateful to everyone making me smile.

[LadyMay]

Yeah I don't like myself either. All you can do is accept that fact and learn to live with it (first stage of healing at any rate, and even if you don't heal it's easier to go, well, easy on yourself than making things even harder).... like these days I am just like "yeah I hate myself and I'm 100% cool with it"

[dream jo]

yep if i wz me wud i be my frind buddy ansr problyss no
wud i shak my arm say hw do u do if iwz goin2 meet me probly no
i thng mots pepel dnt lk thm selvs by god im 1 of thm i am
im tryn 2 get no me wot i sea i dnt evn lik it i dnt
moms demsa is full of verbl abus it me or my 2 siblin but mostlly be hw shsu a bad persn i am well nely evy day mow cud say
if i saw me in st i wud run mil i wud u cud say
di i luv my slf no
do i sea gud in my slf no
am i a bad persn probly u cud say gt tld it evry dayi do

[firstandlast]

No one is in position to appreciate themselves; your judgements aren't your own, though your own they may convincingly feel like-- Why should how you feel about yourself matter, if you truly didn't like yourself change would come about naturally without option, because the choices in your heart would not allow you to be anything but your best self--

You have fallen for a mirror you have mistaken as yourself--

Think deeply upon why you do not like yourself, and see it is that you are unappreciated in every way, and see this thoroughly-- If you do not like yourself, than you do not like your creator, and you can never know love by a creator who did not create you the way you truly want to be, because then it created something that is not you as you--

Look deeply-- Self hate brought me to such realizations--

[declan]

Hi Esmatt. No need to like" yourself" or any other "self". Feeling a need to be liked by others in order to feel complete is a trap. You get stuck in a circle,wanting to be liked and trying to be sociable and in fact you are just causing the very opposite to occur.So IMO its far better to have a genuine attitude of ,i dont need anyone to like me.This is me .Feel it ,dont act it.You should look inside.How bad can you be?.You dont have to be perfect.Be brave be real.Good luck.