Matt leaving door open, people stealing my candles, dog biting me and date rape kit

[Ladyrose92]

In the garden Matt had his friend over. His friend was saying how cute Lady our dog was. I made a kiss sound to her and she come running over to me and was standing up at the table being cute and Matts friend was saying how sweet she was. Matt offered me a cigarette as they were smoking. I said yes and it was in my mouth unlit but the wind blew it out my mouth and it landed in a cup of water. I said oh no to Lady and put it down on the table. Then my Auntie Joanne came into the garden and said the front door was open, that she had been sitting at the bus stop by our house as thought she'd say hi but the door was open. I realised Matt left the door unlocked when his friend come in and it was letting other people in the house. May over the road came in and was talking about herself excessively like she does and Matt interrupted her and said we're not having that and so I saw her out. I took some dirty cups upstairs with me and a drink mixer bowl but at the top of the stairs it was a really narrow gap/hole and you had to have your shoulders a certain angle to get through, I couldn't at first and was stuck but then I figured it out. I saw people I used to live with Sarah using the toilet so I was hiding in the kitchen and then I saw her daughter Charlie in the dining room. They were stealing my candelabra candles. They had put blue tape at the top and wrapped them in cling film. I was arguing with them saying they couldn't have them, but they were fighting back and trying to take them off me. They said Matt had made a deal with them that they could have them in exchange of an interview for him. I was so angry and picked him up bashing his head against the fireplace. I got the candles back but then other people came in and was helping them get them off me which they did., there was about five of them and I was outnumbered. Then I couldn't find them I looked out the front door and couldn't see them. A man sitting in the lobby at a desk told me they had gone into a secret cupboard tunnel to escape. I crouched down and looked in there I saw the back of someone's legs moving away. I went to grab them but there was a fierce dog protecting them and stopping me from entering. It was grey and like a cockapoo with curly fur but was very square in the face like one of those grandad lap dogs. It was growling and showing it teeth. I tried pushing it out of the way and stroking it to make friends with it but it bit my right index finger and had lock jaw on it so I was picking it up by my finger and thinking how I could get it off as it was really hurting. I put my hand in another cupboard with a rubbish door that didn't close properly. It was more like a plank of a door with a lock at the top so the dog would still be able to push out the bottom. I was trying to scrape the dog off with the door as I pulled my hand out the gap. It wouldn't let go for ages but eventually did. I was holding the door trying to find something I could put against the door to keep it closed then I woke up and was crying. There was another part of a dream were I bought a nail date rape kit but I can't remember what part probably before it all. I was choosing which colour nail varnish I wanted that changed colour when a drink has been spiked. I had purple glitter at first but then chose pink glitter.

Matt was being so mean to me yesterday. He says he isn't and attacks me emotionally so bad. In the day he done it and I said I won't tolerate it and left the room he came and said sorry. Then he done it again before bed. Again I said I won't tolerate it anymore but he couldn't see he was at fault for the horrible things he said, he was using personal things against me about my family and who I am that I've been working on trying to make me feel small when I've been nothing but kind to him throughout the day, making breakfast etc and he wouldn't see that what he said to me in the first place was out of order, he kept focusing on what I said back to him in anger saying how his behaviour makes me feel as me being mean about him! All I done was question why he was saying such hurtful things to me and got upset. I had enough and turnt my back to go to sleep. There's no reasoning with him. I guess the dream is about this experience.

[Michelle11]

I suspect the dream is a direct reflection of the day you had with Matt. His actions were causing your emotions to steal your spiritual light or your friend side. He made you feel small and dislike yourself. Why does he have the power over you? Why does what he say have such weight? He is a human who has a lot of hangups, is he really an authority on what makes for good people in the world or who you are as a person? Change where your definition of your self comes from and he won't be able to make your friend side attack you. You turn on yourself as a result of the things he says, it is time for this to stop. Refuse to take any of it on and see if that helps. Just say no to yourself, I refuse to feel badly about myself..

[Ladyrose92]

I understand, I try my best to not let it bother me but then it does and I get annoyed he's saying this things about me and that Im in a relationship with someone that says those things about me. Maybe I have an idealised view of what a relationship is because I don't believe people should treat others like that so it hurts and I take it personally. I explained how it made me feel yesterday and he said sorry and that being together for as long as we have, we are bound to have arguments. I just feel personal insults and nasty digs are out of order, but you are right that if I don't let it hijack how I feel about myself, then no-one can have that power over me. This is a really hard lesson to learn fully, I've been getting better at it and felt O.K. for a while, but in the end it just bothered me and I feel rubbish inside myself. I guess this relates to the being perfect belief because if I accepted others wont always be perfect, and neither can I be, then I wouldn't have turnt on myself or him. Also I feel it relates to wanting acceptance from others, but I need to accept myself and know that its God's acceptance that counts which again would stop me from feeling small. At the time I feel that I am angry about the things he says, but I guess from what you have said, really I take on and believe the things he says about me then I am angry and hurting myself instead of being my friend on the inside. Thanks Michelle!

[Michelle11]

It's a big trigger for you because you have been dealing with it your whole life and you are tired of it. A part of you believes it but another part is fighting back. That is healthier than accepting yourself in their negative light but not as healthy as defining yourself by gods light. I agree you don't deserve to be called names and made to feel small. It's not about brushing it off but knowing in your heart none of it is based in truth regardless what anyone says. Even if you have some faults that doesn't make you worthy of being called names. We all have faults but all deserve to be treated with compassion and understanding for our faults as we are in a learning not proving process. You will get there.

[Ladyrose92]

Yes this has been an ongoing thing throughout my life, and I am tired of it. That is true, that a part of me believes it, but then there is that part of me that fights back; that is good to see and know! I see how it is healthier than accepting those things about myself in a negative light, but not to the level of defining myself by God's light. I am glad to know I am the middle ground and just need to keep going to get where I want to be! I see, I try brushing it off and not letting it get to me but it still gets to me, so I see what you mean, that knowing in my heart its not true, no matter what anyone says to me it wont affect me on the inside and how I feel about myself. I will just see it as something coming from them and not about me. I understand about being treated with compassion and understanding of our thoughts, I feel like a lot of the time I am trying to prove things but being reminded we are in a learning process makes it easier to accept as a journey and work in progress. Thank you I hope so!

[Alice_1]

Sleep does not always have to mean something. It happens that the film scrolls through the lived or exciting moments of life.