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02-03-2017, 07:37 AM
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How did the best friend know?
I met my soulmate at the wrong time. Even though she and I became friends and dated, there were several factors that came together shortly after the start of the relationship that made it seem impossible. It came at a particular time where I couldn't deal so I just avoided trying and she thought that I didn't care and eventually ended the relationship. I was able to regroup and if felt like I made a terrible mistake. I called her and was surprised to hear that she thought she'd never hear from me again and how she thought I didn't like her. I should've poured it on and told how I felt but couldn't. Anyhow her best friend caught up with me. I figured he said to leave her alone, let her be etc. He said that I need to get back with her. He said I was right one for her. He had only seen her and I together a few times, I never told her how I felt, she thought I didn't care so how in the world did he know?
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02-03-2017, 10:33 AM
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Master
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Salford, UK
Posts: 3,240
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tedmil
I met my soulmate at the wrong time. Even though she and I became friends and dated, there were several factors that came together shortly after the start of the relationship that made it seem impossible. It came at a particular time where I couldn't deal so I just avoided trying and she thought that I didn't care and eventually ended the relationship. I was able to regroup and if felt like I made a terrible mistake. I called her and was surprised to hear that she thought she'd never hear from me again and how she thought I didn't like her. I should've poured it on and told how I felt but couldn't. Anyhow her best friend caught up with me. I figured he said to leave her alone, let her be etc. He said that I need to get back with her. He said I was right one for her. He had only seen her and I together a few times, I never told her how I felt, she thought I didn't care so how in the world did he know?
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RE the bit in bold - I know that's how it can seem, but maybe in time you'll see that the timing was actually perfect :)
Anyway, regardless, I can relate to what you said about not being able to deal with it, I ended up avoiding the connection because I was consumed by my own drama and I ended up causing her heartache in the end, and then later came to regret my self-obsession and thoughtlessness. I think you do need to be completely honest with her if you haven't been already, tell her what was going through your head at the time, the struggles you were having, and tell how you really feel about her - honesty's the best policy, imo, and she'll probably be more understanding than you think.
As for how her friend knew, I guess she confided in him, or maybe he just picked up a vibe from her. I don't think it particularly matters, tbh, I think the main thing is that you have a heart-to-heart talk with her.
__________________
What is your experience right now, in this moment?
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02-03-2017, 10:39 AM
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Master
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: Redding
Posts: 1,920
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I see several ways to know.
Maybe you should tell Her how you feel.
__________________
“Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass...it’s about learning to dance in the rain.”
♓ ♥ ♮♫♪♬♯♭
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02-03-2017, 11:10 PM
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That all happened a long time ago. I did tell her how I felt but it came at an inconvenient time and not the way I wanted. She and I had high expectations while dating but to have the relationship fall apart early on caused her and I to have major insecurities to try again. There always something that made it seem impossible. She moved away with a guy, I gave up. Then about 6 months later, I got a sudden urge to get back with her. It was the only time where I had no insecurities towards her. I just wanted to give a speech about how I felt and if she still wanted be with that guy then I would've been at peace. Unfortunately, the guy tragically died before that happened. Even though she and I eventually went on a date that seemed promising, afterwards she became angered at me, I guess because of guilt. The ways things have played out shows that the best friend had a true sense of knowing.
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02-03-2017, 11:40 PM
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Ascender
Join Date: Dec 2015
Posts: 941
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Sometimes things are pretty obvious to others--
__________________
Do not listen to me if you do not wish to be hypnotized into a misleading worldview and become enslaved by alien godz (some might say hindu)-- By reading my posts, you fully consent to initiation into this cult, which may or may not occur--
Stay off the garden path--
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03-03-2017, 12:17 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by firstandlast
Sometimes things are pretty obvious to others--
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Yes, it may be easier observing from the outside that two people are either a good fit or not. I've done that many times. I don't think it's obvious to realize that two people right for each other especially after a failed relationship.
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03-03-2017, 03:10 AM
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Experiencer
Join Date: Jun 2016
Posts: 279
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Could be anything. Maybe it was something that was said, or maybe he felt some type of energy. A mutual aquaintence said something regarding me and my SC in front of both of us (not 100 percent sure why) and started a domino effect of welp, emotions of facing the truth I guess. A hot mess lol.
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03-03-2017, 10:17 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tedmil
I met my soulmate at the wrong time. Even though she and I became friends and dated, there were several factors that came together shortly after the start of the relationship that made it seem impossible. It came at a particular time where I couldn't deal so I just avoided trying and she thought that I didn't care and eventually ended the relationship. I was able to regroup and if felt like I made a terrible mistake. I called her and was surprised to hear that she thought she'd never hear from me again and how she thought I didn't like her. I should've poured it on and told how I felt but couldn't. Anyhow her best friend caught up with me. I figured he said to leave her alone, let her be etc. He said that I need to get back with her. He said I was right one for her. He had only seen her and I together a few times, I never told her how I felt, she thought I didn't care so how in the world did he know?
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One learns to read people.
But if she really is your soul mate, a reconciliation is possible unless you've
both diverged.
...
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