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Go Back   Spiritual Forums > Spirituality & Beliefs > Love & Relationships -Friends and Family

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  #1  
Old 03-12-2017, 06:17 PM
Inika Inika is offline
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Join Date: May 2015
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Lies

The lies, lies people tell to themselves about their relationship. Why do people lie?

Why do people not see they do it, yet others do?

Why do they delude themself, take another for granted, play others for fools and continue to lie to themselves and others involved.

Why are they even here?

lessons? then when will they learn? When they screww over 20 more people? When they get 'caught' out?

I don't like liars. Especially when in return they demand and expect truth. Same rules never apply to them.

Why are people so twisted that they use other people to avoid their life issues. personal issues. why cant they deal with their own self? Expect others to deal with them though?

Why are they so full of ego it needs constant rubbing because one thing is not enough. Unsatisfied liars cant have another be the cure. their disatsifaction will never be filled in by another. its deep in their own self. searchng for a reflection that makes them feel better.

liars.
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  #2  
Old 03-12-2017, 08:58 PM
Nature Grows Nature Grows is offline
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Reason people tell lies (that i can think of atm)

1. To avoid trouble, to avoid something.

Example 1.

Bob: "Hey did you pick up my cousin like you said you would?"

Ben: "Ugh, yea of course"

Bob: "Then where is she?"

Ben: "Oh, ugh well i picked her up then she said she wants to walk half way because, you know site seeing an all that"

Bob: "She just text me and said you never picked her up"

Ben:

Example 2.

Bob: "Hey im going to the movies today do you wan't to come with me?"

Ben: "Oh gee that sounds so fantastic but.. ugh you know what iv got this thing i need to do.. so i really can't"

Bob: "Whats that thing you have to do?"

Ben: "Oh it's a thing... just a thing, so yea got things to do....something"

Bob:

2. To boast, to make something into something it wasn't.

Ben: "Man! should have seen it! before this big dog tried attack me but i scared it away, no one messes with me!"

Bob: "I did see it i was watching from across the road you ran for your life"

Ben: "What ever man... i don't care what you say"

3. To get something they want, to make people do something they want.

Example 1.

Ben: "So someone i know is going to give me a ferrari soon for free but i don't really want it"

Bob: "Woah! can i have it? i always thought they were awesome!"

Ben: "Yea sure i don't see why not, how about you buy me that new laptop i wanted an we'll call it even"

Bob: "Of course, no problem"

(Bob never gets ferrari)

Example 2.

Ben: "Hey can you drive me to the airport, it's really important i get there fast i think i may miss my flight, ill pay for fuel though"

Bob: "Yeah sure buddy, as long as your paying for the car fuel"

Ben: (Opens wallet, sees money inside) "Oh man im sorry i have no money actually i didn't realise, don't worry about it i'll just walk"

Bob: "You'll never make it in time! c'mon i'll still take you"

Ben:

4. To cause issues, to manipulate situations.

Ben: "You know Wendy? yea well today i saw her an she said your a jerk"

Bob: "What do you mean, she was with me all day today, we didn't see you"

Ben:
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  #3  
Old 03-12-2017, 09:23 PM
Inika Inika is offline
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lol. avoidance

and when in context of relationships the lies get bigger.

you know. i thought about it some. lies. I think it's to soothe harsh blows of reality. to avoid effects of actions. I do know. karma does play a part and what you serve gets served to you. You'll understand how it felt one way or another. It's be done to you. Even stevens.

another thing.

people, not all, some. mostly with low self esteem. are prone to being prey to lying manipulators. They then become liars. like taking on some of whats served on them to be served on another. it goes around. and none of these types like themselves very much. Not many sit with themselves and re-evaluate where they are at. Not many take enough time out for the self to really know who they are and therefore know their core values and stay true to them.

usually in and out of relationships. at least, having only months in between each one. never enough time to sit with the self and have a relationship with the self.
they dont like the self.
want someone else to, to show them they are likable.
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  #4  
Old 03-12-2017, 09:33 PM
Nature Grows Nature Grows is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Inika
lol. avoidance

and when in context of relationships the lies get bigger.

you know. i thought about it some. lies. I think it's to soothe harsh blows of reality. to avoid effects of actions. I do know. karma does play a part and what you serve gets served to you. You'll understand how it felt one way or another. It's be done to you. Even stevens.

another thing.

people, not all, some. mostly with low self esteem. are prone to being prey to lying manipulators. They then become liars. like taking on some of whats served on them to be served on another. it goes around. and none of these types like themselves very much. Not many sit with themselves and re-evaluate where they are at. Not many take enough time out for the self to really know who they are and therefore know their core values and stay true to them.

usually in and out of relationships. at least, having only months in between each one. never enough time to sit with the self and have a relationship with the self.
they dont like the self.
want someone else to, to show them they are likable.

I realise the examples in my post are not about romantic relationships i just went off and had fun with it but still the reasons are there anyway.

I think your right when it comes to the relationship lies, people may say it's not so bad, an make stuff up to make themselves feel better about it but still deep down they know they are lying to themselves, kinda realise or know on some level but are just avoiding really looking at it, We can lie to ourself about anything this way not just relationships, the mind may try make up reasons and talk you out of how you really feel about something, you know.
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  #5  
Old 03-12-2017, 09:43 PM
Inika Inika is offline
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Quote:
the mind may try make up reasons and talk you out of how you really feel about something, you know.

I take this piece from your post to add-on. Thoughts (thanks Gem full moon) on this go deeper. The lies we tell ourselves. who is that though? who is talking in the mind with deception of lies. to the self and other(s)? is it serpent energy. the liar? the deceiver within that cant have good. is not worthy of. Is not deserving of. Honesty, truth, love, compassion. Who lies to them in the mind? Who is that voice? What is it and why?

whispers lies by thought forms and you go 'omg, yep, so true, that B!' and you turn against someone. And it was never true. And if there were any truth in it, the lie misconstrewed it. twisted it. like ego over the top protection (of what?) steps in and causes ruin in friendships, love and family.

anyone ever notice that? in themself, or another? on here or in real life offline? what and how do you witness the deceptive liar within the mind ready to pip people against one another. Who is getting their jolly joys from the wrecks? What satisfaction is it to cause despair and ruin through beliving lies from one tongue toward another?
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  #6  
Old 03-12-2017, 09:49 PM
Nature Grows Nature Grows is offline
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I need to go to work in a second, but it can be peoples wounds and traumas talking, it can be, and also the programming or life experiences we have had talking but looking / remembering them from a certain perspective that is not so helpful.
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  #7  
Old 03-12-2017, 10:04 PM
Inika Inika is offline
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yeah. you're so sage atm!

it couldnt hurt though right, to take time out for yourself and tend to the relationship wth self to really know what your values are. being in accordance with them and really knowing what you're about. Before clinging to the next body that takes you by interest.

boring, i know. but a little sacrafice can pay off big time.
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  #8  
Old 03-12-2017, 10:09 PM
EndoftheRoad EndoftheRoad is offline
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It's almost always that. Same loops occurring and family imprints. The why of it, and the design is up to the observer. When you have someone who is constantly manipulating or lying the easiest thing to do is to take someone literally. Just see what their reaction is.

Observe what you may be adding into the story and what you can learn from it, any repeating themes. Change your reaction, see what happens.
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“Once you realize that the road is the goal and that you are always on the road, not to reach a goal, but to enjoy its beauty and its wisdom, life ceases to be a task and becomes natural and simple, in itself an ecstasy.”
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  #9  
Old 03-12-2017, 10:13 PM
FallingLeaves FallingLeaves is online now
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Inika
yeah. you're so sage atm!

it couldnt hurt though right, to take time out for yourself and tend to the relationship wth self to really know what your values are. being in accordance with them and really knowing what you're about. Before clinging to the next body that takes you by interest.

boring, i know. but a little sacrafice can pay off big time.

when you've sacrificed and sacrificed and sacrificed and noone seems to care other than for their own personal gain out of your sacrifices, you quit caring too.

as far as telling lies... it is just as mean to call a victim out on it as it was for the liar to force the situation in the first place. You are jsut throwing more blame on a person who already has to deal with a lot of weight. How exactly does that help anythin gother than your own person need to let off steam?

And anyway, it can be very difficult to get out of situations with liars. They are very compelling sometimes. Sometimes you do what you gotta do, and then to get it thrown in your face by bystanders who don't know anything about what has gone on before or what is going on now is jsut more of a rub. Just plays into the liars hands I guess, since all they seem to want (according to your reckoning anyway) is the train wreck.
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  #10  
Old 03-12-2017, 10:18 PM
ocean breeze ocean breeze is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Inika
yeah. you're so sage atm!

You both are. I found this to be an interesting read, relate-able, and full of insight.

Quote:
anyone ever notice that? in themself, or another? on here or in real life offline?

Yep, in all of those.
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