I am struggling with what I believe to be the same thing at the moment. Before I had my awakening I never believed in past lives. In fact, as a Christian that is rather, taboo, as to sharing in a Christian format.. BUT I feel God has shown me a few past lives & connected to these souls I've been consciously meeting the last # of years.
Right now there is a guy who comes around a lot, we are same age. He is in the same apartment complex, I can set boundaries but when I open the door to him, he comes around TOO MUCH, and it's toxic to me in the amount of time he is wanting to spend with me.
I do feel though that he and I need to know each other but to pull too tight just isn't working. I seem to right now it's like even shorting out, because when one of my closest souls is near me and there is a lack of order, or healthy boundaries etc.. there is this download into me from above (Heaven) I believe, where I HAVE To have my space & time, and continue to work on myself.
I don't think probably all of the ones that were toxic from my past were /are from another lifetime.. & not saying that is what you are thinking..
I would say work on yourself. I didn't marry until mid life, not because I was desperate but I was waiting on God. It didn't work out.. & precisely I think that yes he is one of my primary 12 soul group (the ex), I believe, but there is a larger picture, more in our soul group & in Heaven, transformed light bodies it is soul family, soul groups..
The 144 larger soul group & the 12 primary souls resonates with me..
Again it seems to be soul FAMILY.
For now.. I have my own developed life, interests, etc..
I think there is usually some, a few at times, souls I connect with but I have to keep myself in the picture. I choose not to date.. I had the marriage .. Also I don't see this earth as home, I see HEAVEN as my HOME, and though I can be close to my closest souls, I think there is a lot to do in Heaven...
so working on self, interests, loving/ forgiveness & of self... to me it's focusing #1 on God, and allowing the process of time to work in our lives.
I can relax in that knowledge (Heavenly Knowledge), trusting God's Timing.
I read scripture a lot.. My closest of souls are very spiritually developed at this point, all are Christian, but some very difficult lives.
We all seem to have that, "mission," that these soul groups will discuss..
this need to serve, however it is.. even if in a small sense, but a knowing there is more..
This is 3D .. to me, I see heaven as a 10 D. So to let go of expectations as to find say, the one, but release the healing to Love, forgiveness, working on self.. trusting God & His Timing.
The guy around me now, reminds me of a son/grandson.. he is same age I am. He comes around too much and it is driving me nuts.. I set boundaries but he will immediately start coming around too often if I loosen them. YET, I get it, I feel bad too..it's a knowing & a sense we are connected close, he says same thing.. and also smiles when I say he reminds me of a son/grandson.
I know that sounds weird but God has shown me like a story.. into past/ present/future, I feel....
The answer or at least for 3D, I think has to be to love, for me it's trusting God to bring us back together on the other side.
He used to farm, this latest connection.. he knows in extreme how to work the land, he knows how to raise animals, garden, etc.
He did this type of work in his adult years... I can see him doing this in heaven. He loves it... I think I will see him but not necessarily often..
Our spirits are connected..
Each one of my primary 12 that I have met so far it's like it's very purposed, unique... that connect also comes together I think on other side...
It's like we have to (my connections, primary 12 and larger soul group) HAVE To work on ourselves to keep that dimensional force, there is light/dark, 3D is lower dimension, I think I have seen into 10th dimension with my twin ray.. I think I was married to my twin ray in another life time.. he wanted me in this lifetime, but he wanted something ELSE.. too. It's like this sense of there is more.. there is. It's heaven & more into 10D (THE KINGDOM)...
This is my experience.. Each soul is different.. different beliefs.
I am Christian so the 10D is heaven. We are 3D here now on this earth.
Can't.. come together... till the other side.
I picture being very close to my twin ray.. (he did want to marry me, BUT no way he was too back and forth with me... I get why but.. )...
I picture being close to my twin ray & close to one of my 7 twin flames.. the others are there yes, but like this order & we are doing what we love to do...
so that, dimensional force, the lifetimes, to then transformed Light Bodies, into forever.. Eternal, Heaven, (which I picture the bottom 3 rungs of the dimensions then eliminated when The Lord comes back to get us to higher dimensions... earth renewed, then HE is in CHARGE (God; Father, Son & The Holy Spirit)... hence like a 4D to 10D, manifest by our work, renewed heaven/earth, new order, no more tears or sorrow.. The light that is manifest in each soul, thus also is the dimension, say 4 D would be lower light emitting from person.. 10D higher light.. or however this works I just see it almost can't all come together on this earth without the process...
I am Christian & God is a jealous God. bible tells me (my bible) that "The last are first, the first are last."
Near death experiences have been helpful to me, reading about how others see heaven.. also trusting God.. staying in the scriptures helps me...
being around others who have similar beliefs & loving/ forgiving/ developing self & recognizing God's timing in all of this.
I sometimes listen to WSO on you tube.. He is Christian too, but he also thinks some of the information has been deluded, .. interesting.. I don't agree with everything he says necessarily but a lot resonates.
I've had enough counseling in my lifetime over the years and as needed (I have to be careful about talking about past lives to most counselors though as they would think I am looney toon).. but working on developing self...
Another, I love to read about habits of successful people..
All of these things combine.. taking personality tests.. I love the 16personalities . com.. that is awesome & online for free.
Take care! Keep yourself in the picture.. I keep God #1, I can die to myself but it's about being made knew and with HIM.. so.. that's my take on this.