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06-08-2018, 11:26 AM
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Experiencer
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 380
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by iris
Wow ...thank you all for your feedback.I need to let go.Maybe i am being silly thinking that he will actually change and become the person i had thought he was .....his words .
Do you think it is possible to stay friends and not cut off completely .Would it be the right thing to do ....when i know that i cannot expect anything now ?
He is still in touch with me ....desparately apologizing and trying to get us back to normal ....saying i realise i have a problem and am getting therapy.Getting therapy for us ...
I cant believe anything he says though .....i feel i need therapy too.
Thank you all ,
Iris
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I once knew a guy who talked just like that. Flattering me, very charming, apologetic etc, stroking my ego while my heart was cringing. It took me a while to find out it was all an act. I still shudder now when I think back to that time. He was addicted to sex and porn. He always had several sexual partners lined up and would move from one to the other. He was never interested in a committed relationship with me (or anyone else) although he'd say anything to keep me hanging around.
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06-08-2018, 02:12 PM
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Master
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 14,332
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He's clinging to you. I believe in hopes to get you to change your mind. You thought he was one way, but he isn't. That's a concrete fact.
He has set up a pattern. You called him on the rug once and he went back to the dating sight even after you confronted him. He will do this again and again. If he's 47, he isn't going to change.
You won't need therapy if you just cut the strings. If you stay in contact with him you will need therapy.
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11-08-2018, 01:37 AM
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Seeker
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: india
Posts: 46
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Thank you Tomma and Linen53.
A question for Tomma please.....How long did it take you to realise the truth about this man ?
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11-08-2018, 01:43 AM
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Experiencer
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 380
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About three or four months, iris.
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13-08-2018, 08:19 AM
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Seeker
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: india
Posts: 46
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Thank you Tomma .
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15-09-2018, 02:29 PM
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Ascender
Join Date: Sep 2018
Location: Redding
Posts: 917
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Try to give yourself a break. There are plenty of addicts of all sorts of things our there zImagjne the universe bringing in a really honerable and healthy men for you to date next time and then just let dating go. It will happen in divine timing.
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