Dr Phil: Soul Connections Special Part 1

Oprahs best mate proudly strides up to camera and address his brainwashed audience with a deep stoic Texan drawl.


DR PHIL


Today we are gonna be dealing with a couple in a soul connection. Now we asked this couple to record a taped intro before they come on to talk about, their relationship but they both said, they were too frightened (Dr Phil looks puzzled) to say how they felt, in front of a camera in case, they changed their mind. Now I don’t know what the hell they are thinking and I am gonna help them rise above their rasin, and start talking like adults in a functional relationship (Dr Phil is an impossible optimist)

We also have an expert on this thing to join us and his name is Dr Know



To the most banal, introduction music imaginable, a terrified looking man and woman are brought out into the studio, in a pair of human nets( sponsored by Madam Destiny is written on the side of each net handle) to stop them running away by Jerry Springers crowd control expert. He is moonlighting, from Jerry Springer given his swift ability to stop people running at others like gladiators and beating the living hell out of each other just for kicks, although today, it is a whole new ball game. His job is to stop them running like the road runner out of the blanking building and to a internet forum, where they will go into a tissue sponsored meltdown.




Dr Phil looks horrified and extremely confused that they are being brought out seemingly against their will. Dr know, a chinese man, with a solid musculature and a controlled sense of power, bows to the audience and to Dr Phil, Dr Phils looks puzzled but thinks, blank it, I will bow to this gentleman, it’s what we do in Texas, we treat others well and buy them corn for barbecues in the midday sun.


As they are sat down by Jerrys kick *** bodyguard, both the man and woman start gulping and Dr Know, suddenly, points his hands towards both of them like he is a superhero, or better still Yoda, retrieving the X wing from the swamp in The Empire Strikes Back. Dr Phil looks extremely blanking confused (he is Texan, likes tennis, corn and Sunday cooks outs with a discreet beer, watching the NFL play offs)



DR PHIL



Excuse me sir, what are you doing


DR KNOW



I am calming their energy


DR PHIL


You’re what



DR KNOW


Calming their energy


DR PHIL


Ok, so if you just both sit down and make yourself comfortable


They both seem to shake a little and one of them starts bawling like a child who just had his favourite transformer confiscated

Dr know bows, to Phil again and Phil, being Texan bows back but has no blanking clue what is with this guy and his love of bowing(he’s Texan and this guy is Chinesse). Dr know then produces 2 A4 note pads, some magical crayons that cover all the colours of the rainbow and some ear plugs.


Dr Phil is lost.


DR PHIL


What are the crayons for,



DR KNOW


They are colour charged with different energetic frequencies and serve as protective energy charms to the pull of the soul connections energies on each other.




Phil looks perplexed, even his moustache seems to be twitching all by itself. It’s an awesome moment of profound clarity.



DR PHIL


Ohhhhh,oookkkkkk, and the earplugs ?




DR KNOW


In case they can’t bear to hear what the other one wishes to share and go into meltdown

[Gem]

Sure are some whack jobs out there... and that's a good thing for the Dr. Phil show.

Lol Dharma.

Originally Posted by Gem

Sure are some whack jobs out there... and that's a good thing for the Dr. Phil show.

just having a laugh here

this experience is whacked

[Spiritlite]

Nice....
Spiritlite.