Nox - Good luck with your situation
I'm going to speak my thoughts directly, and this is all purely for your perusal and consideration. If it is not helpful or provocative to you in any way, then please disregard.
TBH, what I have seen across the board is that unless a man loves you authentically AND is mature enough to commit to you in a meaningful way, he is usually not too reliable. Even just the authentic love as a person and as a partner (a huge one, authentic love, and one that is beyond the reach of many) or just a meaningful commitment alone are not enough, by themselves.
The far more common situation is no authentic love (but some affection presumably) and a day-to-day, shifting-sands understanding of sexual exclusivity...a very gray area for most, sadly, without a deep and transparent authentic love and without a very clear and tangible commitment.
The obvious reason for a pledge of sexual exclusivity is that not all but most women won't have sex with someone regularly who doesn't at least say they are practising exclusivity, as it's a recipe for disease and heartbreak, both. But words are very cheap, unfortunately, when it's all to get a sex partner or a (primarily sexual) relationship going right now. And lies, deceit, and misdirection are the norm here, when we realise far more than 9 of 10 of these relationships are just (for many of the gents particularly) convenient arrangements to get their sexual needs met or else (for men and women both, sometimes) primarily to lap up the easy affection, ego-stroking, and bootlicking that so often comes with.
Additionally, IMO if a man is over 15 and doesn't begin to discipline himself in his heart and soul and is freely indulging himself in fantasising about shagging women he doesn't love deeply, he is really a loose cannon. The sometimes-sexual psychic connection with not just one but various women (& men?) that he has spoken of openly either is or is very much like emotional cheating, but very likely with psychic porn visuals. One women he may love authentically...in which case it will be very hard for him not to bond psychically and energetically...though if he is having sex with you on the ground, he could at least make the effort to discipline himself to refrain from connecting sexually with her in his thoughts and fantasies.
If he was sincerely unable to do this after a real and ongoing commitment to the effort because of his authentic depth of feeling for her and his relatively lesser depth of feeling for you...what would this say to you? To me, it would say he cannot commit to anyone else emotionally and should not be having sex with you OR anyone else, not until and unless he had taken time to deal with his feelings.
But if his desire for bodily sex and bodily touch is far stronger than his desire to be honourable and good to you (or anyone else), then you can see why he is having sex on the ground whilst making love to someone else in his head and heart.
And as for the rest of his energetic connections, if he is bonding "sexually" in an energetic sense with multiple others, whomever, then this is really lax and unscrupulous. This aspect in particular sounds very unsavoury, like spiritual napalm. And it's very much like porn and promiscuity. In fact, it's more a particular type of porn and of promiscuity...made more personal, intimate, immediate, and powerful by his psychic or energetic reach, whatever that may be.
It sounds like he is doing the classic disclosure to reveal his behaviours there, a disclosure that in manspeak typically means "buyer beware, I am a sucking black hole of need that will take whilst giving only grudgingly if at all". It openly proclaims a stubborn and conscious refusal to take responsibility or to allow for natural change and growth, either their own or anyone else's, more or less as follows:
Quote:
"Take it or leave it, but I ain't doing [poop]. I am self-indulgent, amoral, and at best, I skirt the edge of exclusivity all round (particularly in my heart -- I want you to know I'm not committed there and there are many others invited into my sexual/energetic space & my head space).
But I'm also good with the two of us having a sexual agreement or relationship and hanging out whilst I figure out which way the wind is blowing at the mo. So to placate you I will not have sex with anyone else whilst we're having sex, unless I can do it without getting caught or until I change my mind".
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LOL....
I really do wish you all the best in your situation and I hope it all works out. Maybe some of my concerns or observations can serve you to find out more or to discuss and reflect further, to be more certain that the commitment you two have is what you need...as it doesn't sound like it convincingly, as you've described it. Further, you also may need to determine if this relationship would ever have the potential to ever be what you need or require...rather than simply serving up to him what he wants and needs right in this moment, whilst requiring little to nothing on his part aside from a casual commitment to be sexually exclusive. Because it also doesn't convincingly sound like this is the case, either. If it's not clearly and convincingly what you need and require in large part right now in order to be sexually intimate...and further, if it cannot convincingly ever be so...then
I would run for the hills unless I could keep it strictly platonic. But that is IMO precisely what still remains for you to determine.
The key thing is to really keep your eyes wide open and constantly evaluate the integrity of his stated intention, thought, word and deed.
Peace & blessings,
7L
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