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Go Back   Spiritual Forums > Spirituality & Beliefs > Love & Relationships -Friends and Family

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  #1  
Old 23-09-2006, 09:52 PM
e-ma
Posts: n/a
 
Sudden change in feelings towards a friend

Hi Guys,

I hope you don't mind me asking your opinions and advice! I have had this good friend for about nine years and we have always gotten along but there has never been any romantic attraction between us.

Over the last year, I have been literally to the ends of the universe and feel as though my personality and outlook has changed immensely from everything that I have been through. I have become spiritually awake and died from my old self / my old life if you like.

Well, I met up with this friend again for the first time in a few years the other night, when we went out to the pub for a drink and a chat.

It was completely unexpected but as soon as I saw him, I had all of these sudden, intense feelings for him, and felt immediately as though he was 'the one'. I would never have thought in a million years that I could ever think this about this friend.

So all of this is very strange and I am struggling to come to terms with it. It was just supposed to be a casual social event as always, and there I was having these brand new, impractical feelings right out of the blue.

So, I repressed my feelings, thinking that I am probably just unwell at the moment, I am just recovering from a nervous breakdown and have been starved of social contact, that I must just be experiencing some kind of catharsis with this friend because I feel safe with him.

But, some weeks later I feel exactly the same and am starting to consider that this is true and legitimate, the feelings are real.

The thing is, this guy is just going about his happy little life, completely oblivious to the fact that in a split second life on my end has been totally uprooted. I cannot seem to help it but have been thinking constantly about it, soaring light years into the future, wanting to grow and develop the situation way beyond any practical level.

So.. my question is, how on earth do I tackle this situation? He's oblivious to how I feel, and I am in anguish trying to repress all of these increasingly deep and intense feelings.



Thanks in advance

Last edited by e-ma : 23-09-2006 at 09:56 PM.
  #2  
Old 25-09-2006, 02:09 PM
violetmay
Posts: n/a
 
howdy...

When I read this I took some time to think about your words and try and feel what is going on.

The answer is simple in your old format you were not ready or right for him, or rather he was not right for you. As you are now he fits.

That's the easy bit.

How do you progress and see how he feels...

I think he does know how you feel, and is happy you have changed your feelings to stronger ones and he could surprise you by saying he's always hoped you would, but had accepted you didn't. He is just so happy just to be your friend.

Don't rush it... do you have a mutual friend that you can ask if he has expressed romantic feelings towards you.. I feel there is one and they are honest. Then when the time is right talk about this with him.

I don't think your nervous breakdown is the cause.. and I don't think he is just safe.. he is safe, but he is right..

and the nervous breakdown was part of your rebirth. You had to breakdown to build up your new you.

Your life by the way is going to be stronger than before, you are going to enjoy it more and this was necesary to change the rut you were in.

Be patient with your friend, he might be surprised when you announce you've changed your view and might need time to weigh it up.

Good luck... and enjoy your new you. xx
  #3  
Old 25-09-2006, 08:18 PM
e-ma
Posts: n/a
 
violetmay.. helloo.. thank you for the reply.. I was really taken aback by it!

Thank you for taking the time to think about my situation

What you say makes total sense. Sometimes it's hard to trust myself when I have just been through such a profound change. Sometimes i think, hell, all of my previous decisions have always just landed me in trouble.. how is this one any different? I started to lose faith in myself because I have done so many stupid things. But now it all does feel really different.. and this feels like an intuitive feeling, something from the heart and not the head which always ruled before.

Thanks for the advice.. there is a mutual friend, a really sound guy who I'm sure I could talk to any time. I'm sure he would be cool if I ever said anything. I will do as you said, to take it easy.. I'm not sure if my friend is quite in the same place as me right now.. he is less experienced in relationships and stuff so I will take it easy on him. I think he might have a hint of how i'm thinking though..

Thanks..
  #4  
Old 29-09-2006, 09:41 PM
violetmay
Posts: n/a
 
Glad my inspiration or intuition made some sense to you. I think it'll start to sort out now you have acknowledged your feelings as being real. The real relationship with the new you is about to begin in earnest. Enjoy.
  #5  
Old 30-09-2006, 06:06 AM
mikron
Posts: n/a
 
Hi to all E-ma! Truly to be the Light and Higher aspect of free will and you’re Soul! Reflection comes to mind! Meaning what happens to a light worker that opens to the unlimited possibilities of Light and discovers a totally new reality! You are a changed person! 3rd dimension keyword is magnification (breaking down lessons to learn from them) opposites attract! 4th dimension keyword Flow, an energy the expands the emotions and being creative (Light attracts to Light)

when one begins to move from one dimension to another! There is changing in the dynamics in relation to free will. Seek guidance from you Soul and Higher self to consider the amount of sharing your Light that is you!

Namaste mikron
  #6  
Old 10-01-2007, 10:54 PM
Esperanza
Posts: n/a
 
A friend...

This I can relate to an extend... I have a close friend whom I confide in. I share some of the most personnal feelings and situations I might be going through. The feelings are obviously there but there are so much confusion in between. I am engaged to a person I have a child with and he is married to someone else. We both feel something, it is clearly obvious to others and to each other but we can't seem to bring our selves to talk about it. We both have a friend that is kind of our 'middle' man. Sounds kind of childish but bits and pieces of this puzzle is put together with his words. You see he knows him very well and he knows me as well. He sees the feelings in our eyes and hears comments here and there. But things are too confusing to even think about it. I feel something I have never felt before. Is it love?? I don't know. Its something soo strong that I can't find words to even start to explain. I feel as though I have known him all my life. His eyes looking upon mine give me a sense that the feelings are mutural. I feel as lost and confused as you seem to be... I don't know where to start ....

Please if anyone has any comments at all, please post.

Peace and Love

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