Why do we try to mold others into our image?

[shivatar]

I don't understand the urge to act in such a way that we gain followers.

What is so great about our self that we unconsciously act in such a way that seeks approval of others and to be followed.

Facebook. The age of digital connectivity and social media.... it just proves my point.


Practically everything we do is a "do it like me".

ironically one of the most desirable things we see in others is a "I don't care if you do it like me or not" attitude.




I guess we could say evolution. If there wasn't something evolutionarily pleasant about ego, it wouldn't be here now.

eh. doesnt feel right. Anybody else got something better?

[Shivani Devi]

It's all about having/finding a reason for existing either internally or externally.

Often, we seek external approval and recognition to fill a gap within ourselves, in our own being and our sense of it.

Some only exist for others, but when others move on, pass on or they find they are no longer approved of, respected or recognised, their lives become empty and meaningless.

Without establishing full existence/awareness of a 'self concept' first, there is nothing for such people to fall back on.

Also, there's usually a reason for things...people may want to be respected, appreciated, acknowledged, not ignored etc..and strive for all of that, instead of just 'being themselves' and just letting it all happen if/when it does.

Those who strive hard for name, fame, fortune are showing an insecurity in their lives that they need it to feel 'complete' or 'whole' or they are full of ego, pride...or whatever else there is.

It shows they are not ready yet to turn their full focus within and on themselves...on their own deficits of character, whereby if the things they once sought just happen, that is good! but if they do not, that is also good because it's not like we get to control the reactions and behaviours of other people whatsoever.

I hope this adds further explanation.

[naturesflow]

Originally Posted by shivatar

I don't understand the urge to act in such a way that we gain followers.

What is so great about our self that we unconsciously act in such a way that seeks approval of others and to be followed.

Facebook. The age of digital connectivity and social media.... it just proves my point.


Practically everything we do is a "do it like me".

ironically one of the most desirable things we see in others is a "I don't care if you do it like me or not" attitude.





I guess we could say evolution. If there wasn't something evolutionarily pleasant about ego, it wouldn't be here now.

eh. doesnt feel right. Anybody else got something better?

Sometimes it's about seeking approval, sometimes it's about connecting, sometimes it is just about sharing. Your here seeking some kind of interaction in this thread and all the other threads you post, its no different and you hold your own reasons as do all people who connect in their own way. Social media allows for a wider audience and wider connections.

Some follow, some lead, it is the way the world is in lots of ways of connecting and relating, sourcing and creating.

Where your looking is just where your looking.

Just because I am here responding or in fb making a comment or adding a friend, you cant know my reasons. I certainly don't want to do it like you. I am my own person so I will do it my own way here or on fb, so your reason doesn't fit my point of being me and doing what I want to do on social media.

Kindred points of connection, sameness and resonation are part of life and human nature, as are disconnection, differences and not resonating. People link up in that stuff in everyway life is and creates itself.

[Snow Goose]

Reading your post I'm seeing a few different questions I'm not sure how they are related?

Why do we feel the need to mold others into our own image?

I don't understand the urge to act in such a way as to gain followers?

If there wasn't something evolutionary pleasant about the ego, (would it) it wouldn't be here now?

So what is it you are asking about? I see these three things as very separate subjects though they may have some relating points.

I suppose some people do this. Not I.

It's a spiritual thing difficult to describe but I interact with another as lightly as possible so that they - their individuality can shine through. Maybe I once wanted to "rate" people against my own yardsticks - so long ago now - I learned that to love people (in a general sense) I had to let them be.

It doesn't mean that I never want to or have to be in charge of a situation. There are times when I do but letting people be as they are makes that a lot easier.

It also poses a slight question of whether people I meet for the first few times have a problem reckoning me up.

♥

[shivatar]

Originally Posted by Snow Goose

Reading your post I'm seeing a few different questions I'm not sure how they are related?

Why do we feel the need to mold others into our own image?

I don't understand the urge to act in such a way as to gain followers?

If there wasn't something evolutionary pleasant about the ego, (would it) it wouldn't be here now?

So what is it you are asking about? I see these three things as very separate subjects though they may have some relating points.

it's a rant. everything is very loosely related lol.

I'm not necessarily asking anything. I'm lamenting about the way things are

[Snow Goose]

Originally Posted by shivatar

it's a rant. everything is very loosely related lol.

I'm not necessarily asking anything. I'm lamenting about the way things are

So your rant is saying people in general use things like social media to influence others to be more like them. Have I got that right?

If that is the case I don't really see any problem with that, people post things they are interested in, others might be interested in that too and reply, say you post a pic of your dinner on FB, I might not care what you are having for dinner but someone else might come along and see the pic and think that's a great idea, what's the recipe? Those people have then made a connection.

If instead your thread was about why people like to mold others to fit their ideals and not linked it to social media then I think we could have had a really interesting conversation.

Just one last thing, do you realise the irony of posting a thread like this on an Internet forum ;-)

[Starman]

We live in each others dreams or fantasies, and most people prefer fantasy to reality; especially if their reality is a fantasy. We impose our expectations on each other in hopes of fulfilling a dream. All those people who "befriend" a person on "Facebook" are really not their friends; they but provide some ego gratification and a sense of belonging, even if you never hear from them again. .

[LiberatedLotus]

Reason I left most social media platforms.

Yes, it serves a fundamental need:
connect, share, expand, evolve, etc.

However, it's the misuse, abuse, and
content that concerns me.

1. The very design of
most platforms serve the ego.

2. Everything is designed & facilitates
taking things for face value. Nothing
is ever what it seems. Leads to
Grand Deception & Disillusionment.

3. Content. Just toxic on every level.

Yes, it ultimately is based on how one
chooses to use it. However, the 1% that
I found beneficial to my soul was just
not worth the headache & heartache.

[Shivani Devi]

I have never had a social media account and never will!

From its very inception it became a platform for the 'cyberbully'.
Leading teenage girls to suicide through a negative/false image.
It became a medium for expression without any personal responsibility,
Leading to it becoming abused as irresponsibly impersonal.
It was all a competition to see who could take the best 'selfie',
Who could get the most 'likes'...
Then if one did that unspeakable act of 'befriending' you,
It would lead to the very pit of despair and self-abasement.
Also, checking the replies...checking the 'status' of others,
Was the first thing one did as soon as they opened their eyes in the morning,
And the last thing they did before closing their eyes again to sleep,
When, I offer a prayer to my Lord at those times instead and show gratitude for another day.
Can you imagine what the US Presidency would look like if there were no Twitter? no Facebook? no Instagram?
People also value online connections more than real-life ones and a hug is no more than this: a smile is no more than this:

...and that is why I don't have a social media account.