Only interested in the afterlife

Originally Posted by Native spirit

Nobody said it was a fairy tale.them are your words not mine I know how difficult it can be to find work once you disclose your illness,but the only thing that doesn't go down on anyones medical file as a mental illness is just after giving birth,because its hormonal depression goes down as a mental illness as well.there is a stigma against people with mental illness as well as disability.they don't look beyond what they see,so all get tared with the same brush

Namaste

Earth is a hard school, and souls choose different challenges before birth for development reasons. Mental illness is one such challenge, whether it is due to post birthing depression or other types. I am luckier than some and worse off than others, that is the way of things.

I do have people in my life who help me and understand me. It is easy to forget about them, but they are there.

I wish you well on your journey.

[Rakoontay]

I think it is fascinating. I have bipolar, too, and I wonder why in the HELL I chose this life. I've gone pretty much nowhere in life, am constantly flat broke, love life is meh and getting meh-er... why? Gotta be a reason!

[Tobi]

There is much about this life in the world which is disillusioning. I read yet one more thing tonight which made me think "Oh M...G...WHAT a mixed up place this is, basically because of the stuff some humans get up to." And then....thinking of the terrorist actions on Bastille day....

And yet there are literally millions of people who do care, who do display a lot of love. Chances are if you fainted in the street there would be at least one person who would come to help you.
A couple of years ago I could hardly walk. I had acute sciatica and couldn't stand or walk, although I was fine driving, and sitting down. I had to go to the doctor's. Well when I got out of there, I had to get back to my car and it was so excruciating, I went down to the ground to crouch because of the pain. It was twilight in a rainy deserted car park. I knew I would have to crawl on all fours to get to my car.
A woman appeared, asked if I was okay, and when I told her what was the matter (laughing and feeling like a twerp) -she hauled me to my feet, and had me lean on her all the way to my car. What a sweet woman. And I never saw her again. Just a stranger.

So it's often best to focus on the things that bring us the most hope and peace of mind, and try to beam that out somehow as a gift to others, to make their day a little better.
We are in a mixed up world, which isn't really 'home' but we all have a reason to be here. Then when it's done, we will leave.

[shakeithbaker]

Originally Posted by MutedBlue

My life has been a serious of challenges who's hasn't? But because of living at home with a narcissist parent until the age of 40 (still living in the childhood home after parents passed). Having a psychotic break at 17, my mother living at home schitzo affective and in a psychosis for six years, and now my diabetes is in bad shape. Because of my bipolar, I haven't worked or dated in 20 years. If I try I stop eating, sleeping, and can't stop thinking and end up in the hospital. Living a small simple life is what kept me hospital free for 13 years. Okay that is my history. Now my question. I am disillusioned by life, not just because I can't participate in a regular life, but just how things are out in the world and with a lot of people, I am only interested in the afterlife. I am only comforted by ideas, fiction and non fiction, of what's after dying. Angels fascinate me. I've tried, really tried to accept and live life as I'm able to. I am very grateful for what I do have. But its empty. I am hollow. I can't afford another dog. I don't feel joy or love. I am in treatment, on stabilizing medication, but I've been waiting to die for 20 years. Has anyone else felt this way. That the only hope of living is after death?

Wow I have been trying to explain this to people for yrs. I too am bipolar. My life here on earth has been challenging. I have been judged all my life. I'm not a people person, I hate sunshine. Love the clouds, rain, thunder and snow. Love night time. I hate to go outside. I just would rather be alone then to be apart of this hateful world. All I think about is the afterlife. I read about it all the time. When spirits say they are happier on the other side. I get jealous and emotional. If I knew that I wasn't going to have to be reincarnated. I would take my life right now so I could go home. Nothing in the world means more to me then getting off this earth so I can be happy😢😢😢😢 I hate myself for this.

[shakeithbaker]

Originally Posted by Rakoontay

I think it is fascinating. I have bipolar, too, and I wonder why in the HELL I chose this life. I've gone pretty much nowhere in life, am constantly flat broke, love life is meh and getting meh-er... why? Gotta be a reason!

Lmbo I know how you feel. I always ask myself " Why would I choose this life path. So things just don't add up lol

[Rakoontay]

Originally Posted by shakeithbaker

Wow I have been trying to explain this to people for yrs. I too am bipolar. My life here on earth has been challenging. I have been judged all my life. I'm not a people person, I hate sunshine. Love the clouds, rain, thunder and snow. Love night time. I hate to go outside. I just would rather be alone then to be apart of this hateful world. All I think about is the afterlife. I read about it all the time. When spirits say they are happier on the other side. I get jealous and emotional. If I knew that I wasn't going to have to be reincarnated. I would take my life right now so I could go home. Nothing in the world means more to me then getting off this earth so I can be happy😢😢😢😢 I hate myself for this.

However, if you do end your life, you may not end up in the happy place in which you speak of. If you've read anything about it, you will find the most unhappy souls end up in what some faiths call "hell" -- your own version of it that you've created in this life.
It really sounds to me like you need to be on medication that would work for you. I've been on many medications and am now on 5, but it is necessary for me to try and remain balanced that way. I recommend checking out crazyboards.org and reading some of what is there. It may be helpful in dealing with your bipolar. I know it helps me!!

[Rakoontay]

Originally Posted by shakeithbaker

Lmbo I know how you feel. I always ask myself " Why would I choose this life path. So things just don't add up lol

You must've chosen it for one reason or another, and are supposed to see it through. Once you're done, you'll view it as though looking at a movie screen, and can see where you made mistakes, and other times when you made good breakthroughs.

I often question "why am I here, why'd I choose this mess" but it must be for a reason. I suppose I wouldn't BE on the terrible path I'm on if it wasn't meant to be.

Another interesting phenomena is that while choosing your life, you get to be in the body at different points of the life, to see, feel, touch, taste, smell, whatever -- to see if it is something that would work for you. I often wonder at what point did my soul "check out my body" ? lol...

[shakeithbaker]

Originally Posted by Rakoontay

You must've chosen it for one reason or another, and are supposed to see it through. Once you're done, you'll view it as though looking at a movie screen, and can see where you made mistakes, and other times when you made good breakthroughs.

I often question "why am I here, why'd I choose this mess" but it must be for a reason. I suppose I wouldn't BE on the terrible path I'm on if it wasn't meant to be.

Another interesting phenomena is that while choosing your life, you get to be in the body at different points of the life, to see, feel, touch, taste, smell, whatever -- to see if it is something that would work for you. I often wonder at what point did my soul "check out my body" ? lol...

Than you. I appreciate that😊😊😊😊😊😊

Its difficult to know the exact reasons.

Sometimes I think perhaps in a previous life I knew someone who was mentally ill, and maybe I treated them badly, and in this life I am learning more about that experience.

But there could be many reasons.

Maybe it was thought that it would make me become more spiritually aware. Perhaps if I was not ill, I would just be another rat in the rat race.

I would imagine it is probabilities. You have a 30% chance of developing schizophrenia in your future life for example. You have to live the life to the point that you become ill, it is not something you are born with.