Maybe someone can help me regarding the type of connection I am having

[lwinders]

I am trying to figure out where my relationship fits and maybe someone on here can help me. I met someone and it has been life changing. I did not think it was a twin flame at first but I am starting to wonder. If it is not a twin flame I am wondering what type of connection is this? Some things fit for twin flame and some don’t.

The person is my massage therapist. I have been going over the last year every week and I had noticed that during the massage there was an energy between us. It was feeling like a healing, helpful energy. It got to where I was starting to possibly pick up on some of his thoughts and maybe he mine. Maybe the touching and energy bringing up emotions for me to work through. I noticed how much it was feeling positive and healing and I would look forward to it but did not think of him much outside of the massage.

Over time there was some what would be considered inappropriate touching that was mutual. After this it came to my attention that he is married to someone who also does massage at the same place and she has always been there when I would go, I just never noticed her and that they were married until later. He does not speak the same language as I do. We have barely spoken. He is older and we are an unlikely match. One evening, things so happened that he kissed me and since that time that is when everything has changed. Life changing. I walked around for a full week in another world after this and I still do but not as strong as the first week.

What does not seem to fit is- I did not recognize him at first sight. It was not until months after meeting that some kind of recognition took place that changed everything. I also do not feel as if I am looking into my own reflection or seeing myself reflected back to me. Many twin flames say how painful or traumatizing it is. I don’t feel drama or pain or intensity that causes me negative emotions.

Instead I feel so fantastic, it feels like the most beautiful thing ever romantically and spiritually. So much positive energy and happiness and it feels as if it is overflowing out to other people around.

I will not be with this person now because he is married and instead of being sad or upset or feeling a yearning and desire that hurts, I just feel so happy that it has even happened. I feel overwhelmingly that I want him to be happy and a better person towards his wife and his family(not that he wasn’t). I am not going to be with him and I couldn’t be happier ??? That is so strange to me.

We have a connection outside of physical. In that outside connection I feel like we are solid. Through telepathy I feel we have committed to be there for each other. In the outside connection I feel we hold and comfort each other and make each other feel better if needed and we are working together to be better people for our lives and families, including his marriage. And I feel him energetically through out the days and nights, including sexually. I feel like he comes and holds me to sleep every night. It is absolutely beautiful. And I do feel like no matter what he ever does or has done, I would still feel for him.


My whole life is brighter and I am sure my vibration is higher. I have had feeling come into my heart that I have never felt before. Different, and intricate. I feel like the heart love feelings are almost licking my heart the way they come and go. Mind blowing and totally not within any relationship I have ever had. Even before the kiss I had noticed when he touched me I felt as if there was no where else in the world those hands should be but on me. I had already thought it felt like home. After the kiss happened, I went to my next appointment with him as usual and the whole entire time I felt he was home and as sure as I could possibly be that we have been lovers before. When we are looking at each other it is very honest feeling and also I feel very slow welcoming but not in an overly intense way, although sometimes there is an overwhelming sexual attraction that seems to take over everything else for a few moments or hours.

Now I keep going every week and I have him with me much of the days and then one hour a week we are sharing physical space., even if his wife is right there. It does not feel wrong, even if it is- it does not feel wrong at all. I am sure the wife is picking up on the energy as is everyone around. Based on the culture I do not ever expect he would even consider separating from his marriage. I feel like the only way it will ever become more in the physical is if she is some how ok with it… so I don’t really see how that can happen. But that is the only way I can see it working. I am completely against hurting her. So I am just going to keep going to the appointment every week thanking my lucky stars that this has happened to me, that he is going to touch me and stare into my eyes. I no longer feel as though I have never experienced an amazing love because I have and its better than I imagined.

But though it seems very close to a twin flame, I don’t know that it is. It is so amazing and positive though, if it is not a twin flame what is it? It seems almost better than some of the twin flame relationships because the energy feels so positive and there is not the yearning and drama etc.I am not tormented or tortured even though I don’t have him here in the physical, I just feel so happy for it.

I think if he ever disengaged with me in the outside connection I would probably be heartbroken though.

I am separated and I have 3 young kids and I do want a life partner. So that is something I feel is beneficial to me. I am concerned how I can start a relationship with someone else? How will I not think of him all the time?

I hope someone might have an idea what this connection is. It seems so much bigger than a typical soul connection and way more that any thing I have had before and I am in my mid 40's.

[intj123]

The instant recognition thing doesn't always happen, I think for me it was the opposite, took maybe 2 years until something happened. But it happened hard and fast. Actually she did sort of recognize me the first time she saw me, I just ignored her because I was not open.

That's interesting that you don't even speak the same language though, communication will be a challenge.

Sounds like you entered the bubble love phase, enjoy....

[blablabla]

Hi, I am not saying he is or not your TF, but I've had those kind of situations happening to me too, and in reality I realised later that they weren't my TF but a catalyst for me to learn lessons and open my heart so I can learn to live from the heart and be open for true love. This might be the same with you.

If you're intuitive and have some psychic gifts then it is very easy to pick up his energy from far away. This doesn't mean he is your TF, it just means you're tunning into his energy.

The last guy I thought was my TF I could easily tell how he was feeling towards me, when he was thinking about me and even predict what he was going to do next. But that was due to my psychic gifts, nothing more. He was just a catalyst.

I think it's not right to be kissing clients and other things in his work place especially when his wife is just outside. This is absolutely NOT "working together to be better people for our lives and families, including his marriage". No, this is not being better people, this is wrong in so many ways and if I was you I would take off the pink-coloured glasses and see the situation for what really is. Maybe he is even doing the same to other clients as well. That just smells trouble to me.

What I am trying to say is, maybe the situation is for you to open your heart to true love but learn the lesson of not being open to unavailable guys like that one.

Hold on to that love because it is YOURS! It is not a gift from him to you, but simply that has awakened inside yourself and you deserve a great guy that is available to be with you and love you openly.

I feel that eventually you'll realise this yourself and stop going to that massage place. Give it time.

Don't ever confuse the message with the messenger.

[jro5139]

I don't know or think that every tf relationships has to fall into the exact same criteria or have all of the same exact circumstances behind it to be a tf. I am not an expert though, that's just my opinion. I don't really get that at home feeling with mine, but it's more like a deep comfort, for example. Of course nobody can prove anyone is really a tf or that it even exists so who knows. What you can be sure of is that there is some sort of connection.

You say there is no drama or suffering... but I think if you stay in this situation, that will come. I'm not saying that to discourage you, but given the situation it is bound to lead to drama when the wife finds out. The longing to be with him and suffering, that will come after the bubble phase and if you are truly in love with him, you are bound to want to be with him eventually leading to suffering.

What bothers me about your story, is his willingness and with such ease that he is willing to put his job in jeopardy. Are him and his wife the owners of the place? Because if not, clearly, he would be in a lot of trouble and get fired for his actions. It just seems off to me that he doesn't seem concerned about his job. I realize there is a connection that is powerful. I had a powerful connection with mine as well and I met him while he was at work. Mine admitted to having a connection with me but he was very concerned about his job and he never made a move on me because of that, he wouldn't even officially be my friend until we were out of that situation. When we did kiss, it was initiated by me, we got caught kissing and he made me promise we would not do anything again until we were out of the situation. I actually got him in a lot of trouble at work.
It just struck me as odd that he so easily made out with you and personally, I would be concerned that he does that with other clients as well. Just based on the ease of which he did it. Something about that is not sitting well with me, just letting you know.
As far as you saying, something could happen if the wife is ok with it, are you really ok with being the other women? Are you ok with having a fling and possibly never seeing him again? These are the questions to ask yourself. Mine is married and there was a time, admittedly (although I'm not proud of it) that I probably would have slept with him anyway but now I'm really glad that didn't happen. I realize had we hooked up, it would have ended badly and probably, I would have never seen him again. Now we have a friendship and I would much rather have that then have had a fling which ended badly. So I would say just try to have a friendship but if you don't speak the same language that will be difficult.

By the way, I am in the same situation as you, I am separated from my kid's dad, have 2 small children and am almost 40. So I can relate to your situation. Although I don't feel a need to find a partner, I do ok by myself. But just to let you, I can relate to how you feel.

[Awakened Queen]

It's most likely a karmic connection, but why are you doing this to yourself? This has nowhere good to go. He's cheating with you on his wife, and he's crossing serious professional boundaries as well. Put yourself in her shoes. What if you were married to him and he was doing this with one of his clients that he was attracted to? How would you feel? I know you're in la-la land right now, but you really need to look at the facts and stop basing everything on the connection you feel. You need to manifest a life partner who is AVAILABLE. This is a toxic situation. The writing is all over the wall.

[lwinders]

[quote=blablabla]Hi, thank you for taking the time to reply. I read yours and a couple other replies and it seems a few people are calling out the morality of the situation. I just want to say that it may be inappropriate that we have had some touching and the one kiss. But to me it was not done in a way to be secret or exciting because we are doing something wrong, but it was more that the connection brought it forth( I was not expecting the kiss at all btw). So in ways it can be considered wrong, it just does not "Feel" wrong to me for the most part. Not because I believe it is ok to be secret because I don't, so that is why I don't really want it to be a secret.

It just feels like a beautiful thing at the core of it, as the truth of it. That is what is so amazing. That because of that beauty that is why I am not heartbroken we cant be together, that is why I would not want him to leave his marriage but thrive in it instead. So even though the kissing incident and some touching have happened, ultimately it is because that happened why I would "want us to work together to be better people for our lives and families". That feeling has been what came after the kiss and the recognition of each other.

Another commenter said something about would I be comfortable being the other woman. The answer is, I don't think so. There is most of me that believes that will not happen and we wont ever be together physically or sexually. Ultimately I do not want to interfere in his marriage or in anyway hurt his wife. I would just want whatever we have to enhance their situation, but honestly I don't know anything about their lives together and I just don't see us ever being together, or having a torrid affair, or him leaving and us being together. I don't see it. I do however feel that we are sort of carrying on a relationship in the hearts and outside of the physical. So I guess that could be considered wrong too if looking at it a right or wrong way.

I do feel like I am making realizations and changes in my life that are positive and that what has occurred here has brought some of that about, like the catalyst you mentioned. And I feel like we are both somehow making good changes inside because of it. I can say I feel my heart has opened, but there is still a way to go and feeling like we are growing definitely does not feel wrong.


This has always happened in a common room where there are many people. Not in a private room with wife outside. Except the kiss happened unexpectedly when there was a moment of time where apparently everyone had stepped out. I think he is possibly the owner of the place and could he have done it before or do this often? I suppose he certainly has or does as much as he wants, I don't know. To me at first it just felt like a healing and helping energy connection. So if he does it with others then he does. I only know what I feel between us when I am there, and that is what is causing me to be on this site because it has been something that has changed me in big way.

And I do appreciate what you are saying about it being my love. This concept was a realization I had had just prior to this situation presenting itself and so, yes I know whatever feelings I am having are my feelings. If someone is helping to facilitate the feelings, then that is helpful but they are all feelings within myself that I am experiencing, which is very awesome. :)

[lwinders]

Awakened Queen- The comment you made just doesn't resonate with how I am feeling about this situation at all. In a normal relationship experience I would expect to feel as you stated in your comment, it being toxic, or why I am doing this to myself etc. This absolutely does not feel any way like that. I don't think I have ever felt less chance of being toxic even within relationships that all signs said go, and all doors were opened, and there was nothing in the way. I probably just cannot convey through words the feeling but it is nothing like what you are mentioning.

[eliana israel]

Yeah, I'm not going to judge you because I can see how that kind of connection can bring forth a sudden kiss. But as long as you don't do it again =) I'm glad you want him to thrive in his marriage.

[blablabla]

I think that is wonderful what is happening to you, i.e, regarding opening your heart to love and feeling that you are capable of a higher love. It is truly a beautiful moment and I am pretty sure you're on a spiritual path towards great things.

I do know the intensity of the connection you're mentioning, if you do a search for my previous posts, I've written about that before when I thought I have met my twin flame.

I later realised that you are supposed to feel an intense connection because it is the only way to learn lessons and opening your heart. But then when I saw that a lot of things were just off with whom I thought was my TF, I realised it was not a TF at all, but a karmic catalyst for my heart opening journey.

And one thing that I've also realised about this type of catalysts is that there are ALWAYS blockages about them. Or they're emotionally unavailable, or they live far away, or they are married/in a relationship, etc, etc. The blockages are there simply because he is not the right man to you.

I continue to think that you'll start to see things for what they really far prettty soon and will stop going to that place.

And yes, the love will remain with you and you'll be able to find the right man (soulmate, TF, life partner, whatever) that will be available to you.

[Awakened Queen]

I read it again. You're going back every week knowing full well he's married, and I imagine if he made more moves or propositioned you, you would be open to it. It's one thing to feel an energetic connection to somebody, it's another thing to break moral boundaries. What he's doing is sleazy. He may be a natural healer, especially since he's a massage therapist. A lot of people are able to heal through their hands. That doesn't make inappropriate touching with clients acceptable. My only advice is to protect your heart.