Ascension

Originally Posted by Emm

When we fully understand the laws of attraction most basic religious concepts delivered by their original teachers make sense. Its about getting to know our inner self.

Which is where you seem to be heading, trying to understand it more fully rather than heaping misguided beliefs on top of misconceptions. Spiritual is as Spiritual does, not as Spiritual says it is. When we being to understand ourselves better and the reasons we do things - including being Spiritual and having our beliefs - everything becomes much clearer.

[7luminaries]

Originally Posted by peteyzen
With respect that may be your definition of Karma and kamma, but generally they are interchangeable words for the same thing. I could bore the **** out of people by posting endless definitions to back my statement and no doubt you will. So, karma has everything to do with intention. secondly, essentially as I said, skillful use of karma is understanding that your intention creates whatever you intend, to come boomeranging back to you. If people delude themselves or dont examine their thoughts , then that is unskilfull use of the law of karma. So, essentially we are saying the same thing. Which I said previously

Originally Posted by Greenslade

To be honest, I've heard all the arguments with karma before and frankly I'm bored with them. No offence you you. With kamma, I've done my homework for kamma and spoken to people in this forum who have spelled it out to me and it's very much in line with my own beliefs. Shocking I know. I've also had extensive arguments over what karma is or isn't and the more I've discussed the more it's descended into nonsense. Karma is nothing more than judgement and reward/punishment mentality and I haven't had a single argument that hasn't gone past that very thin veneer.

Hello gents!

My understanding is that the caste system and much of our justifications elsewhere for spiritual morality historically (like the prosperity gospel in the West) have essentially used the notion of karma in a wrongful manner, to justify the perpetration of injustices and harms and harsh judgment against the oppressed. And to self-righteously and smugly feel that those harms done to others, such as exploitation, oppression, etc., are divinely ordained and that no compassion or justice is necessary to address any of these situations as surely they deserve it.

However karma itself simply pertains to each of us at the lowest level, and to all of us together collectively. IMO it simply means awareness, ownership, and conscious alignment with the highest good of one and all. In the absence of any one of these, we will tend toward misalignment with our own highest good with all others. Both individually and also collectively. In the presence of all of these, we tend toward alignment with the highest good of one and all.

Judgment is first and foremost simply the neutral discernment of equanimity and lovingkindness, of both self and others, but it is often a long road to hoe before we and/or others arrive at that place. And that, along with those necessary ingredients for right-alignment for either the self or the collective, are why the topic seems to many to contain so much conflict and hypocrisy. It does and it will continue to appear so, until we both individually and as a collective are moving more consciously toward right-alignment in the highest good of one and all. Or, toward what I call authentic love in manifest expression. From intent to thought to word and to deed.

Peace & blessings
7L

Originally Posted by 7luminaries

Hello gents!

My understanding is that the caste system and much of our justifications elsewhere for spiritual morality historically (like the prosperity gospel in the West) have essentially used the notion of karma in a wrongful manner, to justify the perpetration of injustices and harms and harsh judgment against the oppressed. And to self-righteously and smugly feel that those harms done to others, such as exploitation, oppression, etc., are divinely ordained and that no compassion or justice is necessary to address any of these situations as surely they deserve it.

However karma itself simply pertains to each of us at the lowest level, and to all of us together collectively. IMO it simply means awareness, ownership, and conscious alignment with the highest good of one and all. In the absence of any one of these, we will tend toward misalignment with our own highest good with all others. Both individually and also collectively. In the presence of all of these, we tend toward alignment with the highest good of one and all.

Judgment is first and foremost simply the neutral discernment of equanimity and lovingkindness, of both self and others, but it is often a long road to hoe before we and/or others arrive at that place. And that, along with those necessary ingredients for right-alignment for either the self or the collective, are why the topic seems to many to contain so much conflict and hypocrisy. It does and it will continue to appear so, until we both individually and as a collective are moving more consciously toward right-alignment in the highest good of one and all. Or, toward what I call authentic love in manifest expression. From intent to thought to word and to deed.

Peace & blessings
7L

This is one discussion that's worn very thin, no offence to you 7L. It's become nothing more than reward/punishment mentality and so far, with all the Spiritually advanced people in this forum nobody has so far been able to tell me what makes good good and bad bad. That's another discussion that's wearing thin. Intentions seem to be more about self-righteousness and the road to hell is paved with good intentions, and if I do something stupid that lands you in hospital no matter how well intended, you're still in hospital just the same. And who judges if that's good or bad karma for me?

Apparently karma is intention, followed by deed/action as cause then effect, the effect becomes cause and so on - but there is no time. That means - depending on your model of time - everything is happening at once or effect can precede intention. Tolle says the past is memory and the future is expectation so I'm not sure where that puts karma but a linear timeframe is egoic, just to include yet another huge misconception.

The Universal Law of Karma sounds wonderful when it stands in its splendid isolation, but what about Life's Purpose or whatever else you want to call it? Perhaps those 'karmic consequences' have nothing to do with karma and everything to do with 'we are here to learn the lessons'.

What is the karma of automatically perpetuating a misconception as a Universal Law without even taking the time to ask objectively what you're perpetuating? More accurately, what's the kamma-vipaka? The Universe is a reflection of you and we create our own realities, so what is the karma in believing in karma?

This from BlossomingTree explains the 'moral' component of what's lumped together with larma -
http://www.spiritualforums.com/vb/sh...0&postcount=33

I'd quite happily go along with you though, 7L, and there's nothing in your post that I'd contradict. For my own kamma-vipaka I needed to know the 'facts' and didn't want to simply regurgitate something that didn't resonate with me. Believing karma is good/bad wouldn't be being true to myself and I know what the consequences of that are. On top of that I can't hold any belief in isolation, so karma and it's morality is under question from that perspective, and for me there's a higher morality than a rulebook of codes.

Seeing as how this is an Ascension thread, isn't it about time we started questioning and thinking about what we're doing, and taking the responsibility for what we're perpetuating?

[Jyotir]

Originally Posted by Greenslade

isn't it about time we started questioning and thinking about what we're doing, and taking the responsibility for what we're perpetuating?

Sounds like a plan, Greenslade.
May the barrel be filled (responsibly)!
We could start right here on this forum, in this thread, with the very next post...

~ J

[Emm]

Originally Posted by Lorelyen

Agreed and you put a different slant on LoA so it seems.

Not so different, this is basically what Abraham teaches ...however it depends on your mindset as to what you actually hear lol. Most seem to see it as a means to have all their dreams come true and its sooo much more than that

Originally Posted by Lorelyen

My problem has been with the word "law". Hicks Inc., Chopra etc, seem to come up with a few "laws" and these will no doubt help people bring order to their lives - but they aren't laws: an outcome can't be predicted and there's always a danger a result becomes superstition.

You can't predict someones outcome unless you're very good at reading their energy, you'd be better off learning to be aware of your own, then judge for yourself.

Originally Posted by Lorelyen

By the LoA if you're aware of lacking something and yearn for it you attract more of the lack, as you say. On the opposite side, lack of something can drive you to go and get it - more the province of Affirmation, as it used to be - (less now, thanks again to Hicks Inc., who seems to have perverted the practice).

The drive to change the lack isn't the same as the one who wishes things were different...more one of a sense something can be achieved, hopeful...a totally different energy.

Originally Posted by Lorelyen

I've just as much a problem with the word "karma" as this seems a conditioned reflex to our moral integrity. Some seem to regard it as balance in which case it aligns with one aim of Qbalistic path-working. Not being sure what karma is I avoid mention!

I have a problem with all labelling to be honest...much better to FEEL your way through life than remain intellectually spiritual lol.

Originally Posted by Lorelyen

I tend to be "spiritually practical". Is the search for Self improving my navigation through "life"? I believe it is but as a believer in the "social brain" Self has to embrace its environment otherwise it becomes closeted. Self, for instance, doesn't deny relationships or interactions - the owner is more aware of context, form, their actions and effects on their environment with each increment of refinement. Every move toward Self seems to tell me I'm further from the beginning but barely closer to the end (if there is one)!

Mind games are nothing but a headache running around in ever increasing circles, if we lived centered through our bodies may we can reach some semblance of balance. We seem to be caught up in an endless fight of what's deemed good and bad taking the moral highway when we cant agree as a race what that might mean. But we all know when we feel peaceful, at ease, happier etc, so isn't it better to just follow those feelings than someone elses idea of good and bad, that to me is more a universal language. Aligning the mind with that sense of goodness from within is all we have to follow. Forget what youre told. Find your own compass.

[SapphireBlue]

Hi, a recent ascension blog I've discovered is soulsoothinsounds.wordpress.com It covers quite a lot there including ascension without being too airy fairy. Especially if you're experiencing the ascension 'void' there's a good post on it. As far as ascension symptoms go, the worst was the headaches and nausea (suppose to be an effect of the brain rewiring itself) which gradually got worse after a few years then stopped after 2012. Joint pain was another symptom.
Anyways, hope that helps :)

Originally Posted by Jyotir

Sounds like a plan, Greenslade.
May the barrel be filled (responsibly)!
We could start right here on this forum, in this thread, with the very next post...

~ J

Or I could come to my own realisations.

[Patrycia-Rose]

Morning Mr G,

It's been said that if you don't hate yourself you haven't done anything close to enough work, but then if you really want to Love yourself unconditionally you need conditions to transcend.

That’s interesting. Can’t say I’ve ever actively hated myself, been too much of an oddball from the get go and that was difficult enough without me adding to it. More a case I think of transcending conditions

anger always has a cause and often it takes some serious drilling down with hard questions to find the root of that cause. An answer always leads to another question and on it goes, peeling back the layers. What happens is that you follow a chain of - kinda - reverse cause and effect.

There was no real anger in my childhood; my parents were protective of me. My father taught me much of how to get on in life, playing the game etc – I was reminded of that in my recent medium session as my father came through with some of his time in the military and how he learned to get on and survive where others failed and how he’d passed that onto me.

I was a very angry young man, and it was coming to the stage where I needed to give vent before it got out of control. That's when I started going to judo, and that gave me an outlet for my anger. That was a double-edged sword because one day I completely lost my temper, went straight to 'white heat' and with cold efficiency tried to kill someone. I just wanted him dead and used a judo lock to do it. Had my friends not dragged me off I would have killed him. I managed to trace that anger back to a dynamic between my aunt and my step-father with me as the 'object'. My maiden aunt hated my step-father because he had 'taken away her baby', my mother lived with her after my father died. My aunt thought that if I made his Life enough of a hell she would get me back. While that was happening my step-father was literally beating it out of me.

Thank you for sharing that. That must have taken some strength to work through the layers of that and come to that realisation.

If you want to overcome your anger, be sure of what you're trying to overcome and the reasons because that comes into the conversation with yourself. I'm still not happy with all this positive and negative stuff because all it does is get in the way. Energy has no polarity in itself so all this positive/negative' bit is judgement, nothing more. When it becomes non-polarised things start really happening. So by all means have the conversation with your ego, but remember that it's where 'positive' and 'negative' comes from, and where is the line in the sand between polarised energy and acceptance/non-acceptance?

Right now, I can’t connect with anger, but then I can’t connect with anything. Since that Bowen, which has to go on the ever expanding list of things I wished I’d never done, I haven’t’ been the same. What’s admittedly worrying me is I have LOST enthusiasm, drive, determination for everything; and the forefront of that is running. I haven’t run in a couple of months. I’ve run two to three times a week for seven years. In that time, I’ve had a few injuries, back ache, pulled leg muscles and through sheer determination nothing was going to stop me from running, no matter how uncomfortable, so I would strap up and get on with it. That grit determination has just evaporated. Where has it gone?!

OK, let's try this. If you're going to come to terms with what's in your head let's try a different tack - https://www.awakeninthedream.com/art...rt-of-alchemy/
Your anger is the Prima Materia from which gold is made.

I tried to read and understand that but that went completely over my head.


I came across a Teal Swan video which was about channelling or getting in touch with that part of the body and speaking as though all of you were that part. Very interesting, I got the full impact of ‘it shouldn’t have happened’ on that part of the body which was at the focal point of the trauma. But it particularly liked when I lay hands on that area; the medium said I’d got healing in my hands.

Also the medium suggested I find something that I trust to release the anger and I thought of EFT, that I know so well. It’s been a while since I’ve done any and I know it took the edge off. So I wondered if there were some suggestions on statements to use and I googled and the first thing that came up was a video of someone demonstrating EFT for anger and I’d never seen EFT done in the way he was doing it, which was using a different statement for each point; and not only that each statement he was using, I thought that’s spot on. So the list is typed up and I will do it at some point when the time feels right.

You're being turned around, you've focussed on healing but you've tried to heal the physical without paying much attention to the energetic/perceptual. Now you've expended your energy for that direction you're being pointed in another direction, one that you're probably unfamiliar with. You have your intuition and it's working for you, so use that as your 'something solid'. The Universe is obviously working with you, as is your guides. What would be helpful now is a completely new paradigm, which is obviously where you're heading.

I feel that that maybe happening; whatever comes from this it’s going to come from a place of nothingness, which is where I am now. The only thing that is keeping me going and I can’t believe I’m saying this, is work! The irony. Had a meeting last week about the new role and it was all very positive. I’ve actually been looking at work emails in the evening, looking forward to going in the next morning so I can focus on something other than the emptiness that is in all other aspects of my life.

Far from it for me to say you're crabby but....

You are the crab, you have this tough exterior but inside you're just a big softy, the fish symbolises knowledge or wisdom. Basically it symbolises you coming to a new paradigm.

That did occur to me but I thought it was too literal; I thought maybe seeing things sideways.

I’ve some interesting dreams lately; one (unwelcome) instance of lucid dreaming which left me exhausted and then last night I dream someone had poisoned me!

https://www.womenshealthmag.com/style/fit-for-life
Your 'Spiritual muscle'.

I recall about memories being held in the muscles, one of the things I like about TAT is that it addresses ‘all the places in my mind, body and my life’ where something is stored.

However, that link had another meaning for me and that it reminded me that the memory of running would also be stored in my body and that hopefully when I return to it, it won’t take too long to get back to the form I’d been in. And I remembered when I started again several years after the trauma and how I got there in the end. So I can do it again, if I get the all important ingredient back of motivation!

I’ve decided to start cranio sacral therapy; that’s always worked for me without backfiring and making things worse. Also because I’m so attuned to the energy I’ll be able to feel what’s going on and how things are in the body.


I was listening to an MK video, one of the first I listened to and I had originally missed the bit where he’d described going through major transformations from 2015-2020. So I started mine in 2016. It might explain things.

I'm not quite ready for Return to Fantasy quite yet, that's going to take a little more bravery than I have right now to face that deluge of emotion. It's going to happen, it's pretty much inevitable and when it does I may not come back in one piece. RtF's going to kick down some doors that I'm nowhere near ready for just yet, especially the two you mentioned.

I can completely understand what you’re saying. As well as the brilliance of the music, the voice, the lyrics – there’s now that added layer of the last time I listened to this I would have been in my parents house with my brother with this on the record player. That’s why when I first heard it the songs on the surface sounded unfamiliar yet I remembered a phrase, a chord, it was rather eerie.

I can’t listen to Rain without getting tearful.


When I’ve been getting home, I’ve been putting on Asia at full blast trying to ignite some spark of energy in me. 1982 I think it was. Heavy rock, brilliant album. Have you got that one?

https://www.amazon.co.uk/s/ref=nb_sb...-keywords=asia

Patrycia

Originally Posted by Patrycia-Rose

Morning Mr G,

Morning Patrycia

Originally Posted by Patrycia-Rose

That’s interesting. Can’t say I’ve ever actively hated myself, been too much of an oddball from the get go and that was difficult enough without me adding to it. More a case I think of transcending conditions

I've never really hated myself but if I could have gone back in time I would have kicked my own backside up and down the street a few times. This is the kind of thing that I've been going through these past months, into all the dark corners of my past.

Originally Posted by Patrycia-Rose

There was no real anger in my childhood; my parents were protective of me. My father taught me much of how to get on in life, playing the game etc – I was reminded of that in my recent medium session as my father came through with some of his time in the military and how he learned to get on and survive where others failed and how he’d passed that onto me.

The anger was in reply to what you were saying about how you'd sat down and thought about your trauma and you hadn't listened to yourself. Anger is a strong energy and is usually an indicator.

Originally Posted by Patrycia-Rose

Thank you for sharing that. That must have taken some strength to work through the layers of that and come to that realisation.

You're very welcome. Even going back wasn't a very pleasant experience but it was worth it, and there's also a very different perspective that comes though when going through that process. It's going back to what you were saying about the consciousness giving the body time to heal and come to terms. Self acceptance doesn't come cheap.

Originally Posted by Patrycia-Rose

Right now, I can’t connect with anger, but then I can’t connect with anything. Since that Bowen, which has to go on the ever expanding list of things I wished I’d never done, I haven’t’ been the same. What’s admittedly worrying me is I have LOST enthusiasm, drive, determination for everything; and the forefront of that is running. I haven’t run in a couple of months. I’ve run two to three times a week for seven years. In that time, I’ve had a few injuries, back ache, pulled leg muscles and through sheer determination nothing was going to stop me from running, no matter how uncomfortable, so I would strap up and get on with it. That grit determination has just evaporated. Where has it gone?!

The Universe gives us what we need when we need it and if you don't have the drive to run then you don't need it - it's the Universe's way of saying 'Don't look there any more'. Running was obviously one of the very important things in your Life but what did you gain from it and what were the reasons you did it? Humans tend not to do anything for nothing, if we do something there's always something in it for us, otherwise we don't bother. What was in running for you?

Originally Posted by Patrycia-Rose

I tried to read and understand that but that went completely over my head.


I came across a Teal Swan video which was about channelling or getting in touch with that part of the body and speaking as though all of you were that part. Very interesting, I got the full impact of ‘it shouldn’t have happened’ on that part of the body which was at the focal point of the trauma. But it particularly liked when I lay hands on that area; the medium said I’d got healing in my hands.

Also the medium suggested I find something that I trust to release the anger and I thought of EFT, that I know so well. It’s been a while since I’ve done any and I know it took the edge off. So I wondered if there were some suggestions on statements to use and I googled and the first thing that came up was a video of someone demonstrating EFT for anger and I’d never seen EFT done in the way he was doing it, which was using a different statement for each point; and not only that each statement he was using, I thought that’s spot on. So the list is typed up and I will do it at some point when the time feels right.

OK, to put it simply - I like simple. What Jung's saying is that what the alchemists were looking for is something in their own darkness, what he called the Prima Materia from which all else is made. It's purely allegory and symbolism, but what he was talking about it taking the 'lead' - the 'bad experiences etc' - and turning it into 'gold' - something far more useful. For instance, if we have a bad experience we can empathise with others who have had a similar experience. That turns the 'lead' or Prima Materia into 'gold'. Anger is a Prima Materia, as an emotion it doesn't come any more primal but channelled in the right way it's a powerful emotion and can become 'gold'. Teal Swan does some material on the Shadow Self that's along the same lines as the alchemists, she digs through layer after layer to get to the bottom of things that are deeply rooted in our psyche so that they can be 'turned into gold'. There's plenty of it but a good place to start is -
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2s8I3yq-Kmo

In using EFT, are you treating the symptoms rather than the cause? I there's a bottom line to what I've been going through, this is it, that I needed to peel off the layers of the onion skin one at a time - only those layers were my own perceptions. What's often not realised is that what isn't dealt with effectively by the conscious mind goes into the the Shadow Self, it's the 'deal with it sometime never' box for things we can't or won't deal with. What happens though is that those demons grow bigger and meaner in the dark places until they're brought into the light.

Originally Posted by Patrycia-Rose

I feel that that maybe happening; whatever comes from this it’s going to come from a place of nothingness, which is where I am now. The only thing that is keeping me going and I can’t believe I’m saying this, is work! The irony. Had a meeting last week about the new role and it was all very positive. I’ve actually been looking at work emails in the evening, looking forward to going in the next morning so I can focus on something other than the emptiness that is in all other aspects of my life.

The emptiness is potential. Your focus is merely on a different aspect on your Life and that's OK - even though it's the last thing you'd expect. We can't tell the future so the best we can do is ride along with it and see where it takes us. It's still you, it's still progress but there's a change in direction.

If the other parts of your Life are empty, what are the reasons you think that?

Originally Posted by Patrycia-Rose

That did occur to me but I thought it was too literal; I thought maybe seeing things sideways.

I’ve some interesting dreams lately; one (unwelcome) instance of lucid dreaming which left me exhausted and then last night I dream someone had poisoned me!

Sometimes dreams can be quite literal too, our subconscious can have strange ways in getting the messages through. But then you're the one that's trying to fill the emptiness instead of just experiencing it.

Originally Posted by Patrycia-Rose

I recall about memories being held in the muscles, one of the things I like about TAT is that it addresses ‘all the places in my mind, body and my life’ where something is stored.

However, that link had another meaning for me and that it reminded me that the memory of running would also be stored in my body and that hopefully when I return to it, it won’t take too long to get back to the form I’d been in. And I remembered when I started again several years after the trauma and how I got there in the end. So I can do it again, if I get the all important ingredient back of motivation!

I’ve decided to start cranio sacral therapy; that’s always worked for me without backfiring and making things worse. Also because I’m so attuned to the energy I’ll be able to feel what’s going on and how things are in the body.


I was listening to an MK video, one of the first I listened to and I had originally missed the bit where he’d described going through major transformations from 2015-2020. So I started mine in 2016. It might explain things.

So if you'll (hopefully) get back to running with your body's memory, how much does traumatic muscle memory contribute to what you're trying to heal now? Tolle said that the past is memory, so if you're trying to heal the memory of the trauma and not the trauma itself? That puts a completely different perspective on pretty much everything we've experienced in the past because while our minds can make us think we still have traumas, what we actually have is the memory of the trauma and not the trauma itself.

We're all going through changes, it happens all day every day but once in a while the changes are more apparent so we take more notice. It really started with 2012 and while it got a lot of bad press it was still significant. It was the 'first step'. The changes have been ramping up since and if you think they've taken their toll you ain't seen nothin' yet.

Originally Posted by Patrycia-Rose

I can completely understand what you’re saying. As well as the brilliance of the music, the voice, the lyrics – there’s now that added layer of the last time I listened to this I would have been in my parents house with my brother with this on the record player. That’s why when I first heard it the songs on the surface sounded unfamiliar yet I remembered a phrase, a chord, it was rather eerie.

I can’t listen to Rain without getting tearful.


When I’ve been getting home, I’ve been putting on Asia at full blast trying to ignite some spark of energy in me. 1982 I think it was. Heavy rock, brilliant album. Have you got that one?

https://www.amazon.co.uk/s/ref=nb_sb...-keywords=asia

Patrycia

We walk the spiral and when we're 'back at square one' we're not really, we're about it and seeing deeper truths and perspectives. Or layers. That makes things interesting. Once upon a time I would have had the melancholia of 'Rain' but then that would have been because I was feeling sorry for myself.

Perhaps what you'd done is - from the perspective of you back then - gone forwards in time, which is why you 'remembered' snippets of the music. It may sound fantastical but there are scientific theories that make it possible, at least from the perspective of consciousness. The brain has microtubules that are 'quantum capable', which means we are entangled with the field of probability where all the information - including Heep music - is 'stored'.

I haven't spent much time with Asia to be honest. I'm going through some weirdness again and I;m very connected to my Spirit kids, especially with everything that's going on around me. My father hasn't been too far away this past while and when he comes around it always knocks me on my backside. There's a kind of 'tightening' happening. Mrs G's a tad nervous right now because of what I'm feeling, she doesn't react the way she used to but she feels it every time my emotions go 'off the charts'.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AkYLsCFNmQo

[Patrycia-Rose]

Hello Mr G,

It's going back to what you were saying about the consciousness giving the body time to heal and come to terms. Self acceptance doesn't come cheap.

As I’m finding out. I’ve got maybe another 30 years and then it won’t matter. Unfortunately, several different mediums have told me I've got a long life ahead.

What was in running for you?

Ah, six words in a simple question and oh, the history behind the answer. I cannot remember when I started running but it was well before the trauma in 2005. For several years after the trauma I did not run because of the full impact on the physical body. Running again was all I wanted to do and a signal to me that if I could reach my previous form, I would be ok. The odds were heavily stacked against me. I had several attempts at getting my fitness back and for reasons I cannot remember now they failed but in 2012 I started very gently and worked my way up to my previous form and a little beyond. So I have run two to three times per week for the last 5 years. Running for me equals freedom. As long as I can run, I am beating the odds. I have continued to run with some fairly uncomfortable injuries but nothing would stop me. A few years back I had a ham string type injury affecting my whole leg. I did wonder whether to go to the docs to get it checked but I knew if I did that they would recommend pain killers, anti-inflams and rest. I don’t put any kind of medication in my body, there’s always a natural alternative and I tried to rest for a few days but after five days I was going stir crazy so I strapped up the leg and ran anyway. Eventually it healed itself. So that’s the kind of determination/enthusiasm/drive I had and I just don’t understand where it’s gone. I can only think, as you suggested, that I’m not doing nothing for no reason, so I guess there’s some wider something going on.

In November last year, I noticed it was becoming harder and harder to run as a long-standing injury to my left leg (not the one I mentioned above) meant I had to focus and concentrate so hard not to trip or fall. It was taking more and more concentration and more and more energy to do it and excuses would come in, I will leave it tomorrow. I then had the Bowen Therapy followed by a viral infection and somewhere along the line my enthusiasm and drive to run simply disappeared and currently it is nowhere in sight.

I knew one day that I would have to hang up my running shoes but I always thought it would be because I developed arthritis, painful knees, a back injury etc I never thought it would be from a lack of mental drive. Hopefully maybe in the late spring summer, I will get my motivation back and maybe take up fast walking as an alternative.

In using EFT, are you treating the symptoms rather than the cause?

Both I think. I've used the exact sentences in this video. It was noticeable how I searched for EFT and anger and this video was the first thing that came up.

https://www.thetappingsolution.com/b...youre-holding/

Although doing EFT for anger seemed like a good idea, I had no idea what statements to use aside from the obvious ‘even though I’m angry .’ but the statements he used in the video were perfect for my situation, I couldn’t have come up with those (which I’m sure is why the universe gave me that video first).

So I did that EFT last Sunday and I’ve never reacted like that before. I went through it twice and immediately felt light-headed afterwards, followed by feeling tired and then very emotional.

Then next morning, I felt freer, happier, lighter I could believe the difference.

So decided yesterday, using that same template, to do EFT for the irritation and annoyance at myself. I went through this one quite a few times but felt that light-headedness again.

So I’m going to start fortnightly cranio sacral therapy and continue with EFT on the weeks I’m not doing cranio.

Sometimes, it does feel hopeless, like I’m just not going to be able to do this on my own. And I briefly thought about going to counselling but from my days working in child protection, I know the counselling approaches and nothing really appeals and then when I woke the next morning I had the idea to continue with EFT. My cards that morning were most interesting and
a signal that doing this myself is the way to go; I had (from 3 different decks) Triumphant Success, Miracle Healing and Heal Thyself. Seemed pretty clear to me.

I think future topics for EFT are going to be sadness, disappointment, hurt. Just this morning I don’t feel irritated or annoyed, another layer gone, it’s the sadness, disappointment.

I noticed that after the EFT for anger I had some really intense and unpleasant dreams, one of which was I couldn’t turn off the ignition on my car and it was getting hotter and hotter and eventually disintegrated. That’s the second dream I’ve had where disintegration is the theme. I’ve also had several dreams where blood is involved, that’s the life-force.

If the other parts of your Life are empty, what are the reasons you think that?

Gosh, another simple question with a complex history, given I’ve always been sensitive; when I was younger I wasn’t so aware of that and stronger in dealing with things. But as I’ve got older sensitivities have increased, so going to work gives me social interaction whether I want it or not and so when I come home and close the down it’s battery recharging time. I’m not really a people person, prefer to be myself, I have good friendships in the past that have ended for one reason or another. I’ve a good friend who I go out with occasionally but the balance between work and home feels about right for now. Also I’ve done a lot in life, writing, running, dancing (medals in that) moving from my hometown, married, divorced, renovating my bungalow, various interest in things along the way. I don’t really feel there’s much if anything ‘out there’ that interests me. It’s always been for me about my internal world, even from a young age I used to listen to music and take myself off to a complete world I created. That’s one of the things I liked about Uriah Heep, those lyrics helped me with that and also it was like they gave me permission to do what I was doing; it was the right way to go (if any of that makes sense).

We're all going through changes, it happens all day every day but once in a while the changes are more apparent so we take more notice. It really started with 2012 and while it got a lot of bad press it was still significant. It was the 'first step'. The changes have been ramping up since and if you think they've taken their toll you ain't seen nothin' yet.

In one of Matt's vids I heard him mention 2015-2020 so we're in the thick of it at the moment.

Once upon a time I would have had the melancholia of 'Rain' but then that would have been because I was feeling sorry for myself.

I thought I saw on another post you were from Aberdeenshire, so with me in the South West, that’s Uriah Heep being played at opposite ends of the country - that really warms my heart!

I'm going through some weirdness again and I'm very connected to my Spirit kids, especially with everything that's going on around me. My father hasn't been too far away this past while and when he comes around it always knocks me on my backside. There's a kind of 'tightening' happening. Mrs G's a tad nervous right now because of what I'm feeling, she doesn't react the way she used to but she feels it every time my emotions go 'off the charts'.

I didn't realise that you have children that have passed to spirit? I'm so sorry if that's the case, if I've read that correct.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AkYLsCFNmQo

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I listened to that after I'd done my EFT and that was really soothing.

Patrycia