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Go Back   Spiritual Forums > Spirituality & Beliefs > Meditation

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  #1  
Old 01-03-2018, 11:39 PM
Aislynn Aislynn is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2018
Posts: 9
 
Trying but not sure where to start

Hi all!

Ok, so I've tried a few different meditations. Now, I used to meditate years ago with simply a candle, I'd focus on the flame. I even helped others to use that method. But that was many years ago. Currently I'm trying different guided meditations and to begin with, I started crying. I had all I could do to stop the tears. No one mentions that so I was completely unprepared and stopped the meditation in order to stuff all the emotions and get some control over myself. I probably shouldn't have done that I'm guessing. I never had that with candle meditation.

Anyhoo, I'm not sure if I should do guided for tf, spirit guide, clearing chakras or what. I'd like to work on connecting more with my tf, whom i only connect with in my dreams, but I'm not sure if I should work on connecting with my spirit guide to help with that later? Or do I need to work on clearing chakras? Do I need to clear chakras right now? Not sure where to start.

If anyone could help guide me, advise me- maybe point me in some sort of direction I'd be so very grateful. I feel like this should be easy to figure out and I feel quite dumb and ignorant. The candle worked great for calming and relaxing, but I'm looking for more than that now. I want to heal and grow.

Maybe I'm thinking too much, which is typical me. Always needing a game plan.

Any and all suggestions and advice will be most appreciated.

Thank you in advance!

In light and friendship,
~Ais
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  #2  
Old 02-03-2018, 02:05 AM
H:O:R:A:C:E H:O:R:A:C:E is offline
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my gut says that your having experienced an outpouring of tears is/was a
good thing. emotional flow is what might be your most effective guide.
whatever sorrows and heartbreak you'd tapped into may need to be
allowed to flow freely... the more enjoyable feelings will be experienced
later, after those 'receptors' have been permitted to release those
uncomfortable things which have been "stuffed" onto them.

so, i would look to start there. connect to your own emotional
sensitivities, and bring them into joy, through acknowledging that
joy is your ultimate goal.
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  #3  
Old 02-03-2018, 02:29 PM
Aislynn Aislynn is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2018
Posts: 9
 
Thank you HORACE for that! I have continued, and while I have not felt the great sobs again ( I wish I would have known enough to let it go at the time), I have had some tears. I think I still need that greater release but it hasn't come again after me stuffing it back down and essentially supressing it that first time. I am excited as this morning my daughter interrupted my meditation by knocking on my door, I tried my best to ignore it and continue but it kept nagging at me and I couldn't take it and had to finally abandon my meditation. When I eventually went out, I stated to my daughter, 'you were knocking'? Only to find out she in fact, actually came into my room! I was not even aware of her presence! While I heard the knocking I never even realized it went beyond that and that she was physically in my room moving around! I am so encouraged by that! To realize I was deep enough that I never picked up on her presence is a bit amazing to me. I knew she had knocked, several times, but I thought she went away and gave up, when in fact she came into my room to get something she needed. So, while I'm disappointed in myself for not continuing my meditation session, I'm amazed by this knowledge! I am what is known as 'hypersensitive' due to past abuse issues. So I am used to picking up on every nuance, which is actually quite annoying. So for her to have physically come into my room and for that to not even register within me.... I find that amazing!

As far as the crying.... I feel I need that release, but it isn't happening now and I'm a bit angry with myself for not letting it flow when it happened. What if I lost my chance at a great release and cleansing? I'm trying not to focus on that or stress about it but I feel like I screwed up big time and missed out on something huge. Which is depressing.

Any advise or guidance you have is so very appreciated.

Love, light and friendship,
~Ais
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  #4  
Old 02-03-2018, 05:12 PM
iamthat iamthat is offline
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Location: Golden Bay, New Zealand
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I suggest you simply relax and allow things to be as they are. It sounds as if you have a lot of pain inside you, and your natural tendency is to suppress this because you do not want to connect with these painful feelings and re-experience them. But there comes a point where suppressing painful feelings causes more pain than simply allowing these feelings to surface. And as these feelings surface we realise that we can cope with them, and in fact it is just the movement of emotional energy through us.

For a long time these painful emotions may be buried deep within our subconscious, but when they begin rising into conscious awareness, our immediate reaction is to resist them. Becoming conscious of this process is the first step in finding release.

So you feel a bit angry because you did not let these emotions flow when it happened. That is OK. If these emotions are rising to the surface then there will be other opportunities for release. It was not a one-off event which will never happen again. It is a process, and next time it will be easier for you. If a dam is going to burst then eventually it will do so.

We tend to think of spirituality and meditation as being all about bliss and light. The Soul does seek to express itself through the personality and body, but as part of this process it exerts pressure and pushes things to the surface to be released, particularly in meditation when we are just sitting with all our "stuff", without distractions. So people take up meditation expecting to find inner peace and instead they find themselves dealing with all sorts of issues. But as we resolve and release all these energy blocks, so we begin to discover a centre of real peace at the heart of our Being.

Peace.
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  #5  
Old 02-03-2018, 05:34 PM
OEN34 OEN34 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by iamthat
I suggest you simply relax and allow things to be as they are. It sounds as if you have a lot of pain inside you, and your natural tendency is to suppress this because you do not want to connect with these painful feelings and re-experience them. But there comes a point where suppressing painful feelings causes more pain than simply allowing these feelings to surface. And as these feelings surface we realise that we can cope with them, and in fact it is just the movement of emotional energy through us.

For a long time these painful emotions may be buried deep within our subconscious, but when they begin rising into conscious awareness, our immediate reaction is to resist them. Becoming conscious of this process is the first step in finding release.

So you feel a bit angry because you did not let these emotions flow when it happened. That is OK. If these emotions are rising to the surface then there will be other opportunities for release. It was not a one-off event which will never happen again. It is a process, and next time it will be easier for you. If a dam is going to burst then eventually it will do so.

We tend to think of spirituality and meditation as being all about bliss and light. The Soul does seek to express itself through the personality and body, but as part of this process it exerts pressure and pushes things to the surface to be released, particularly in meditation when we are just sitting with all our "stuff", without distractions. So people take up meditation expecting to find inner peace and instead they find themselves dealing with all sorts of issues. But as we resolve and release all these energy blocks, so we begin to discover a centre of real peace at the heart of our Being.

Peace.

This is a great post!

A cracking lad on here said to me ''You can only heal what you can feel'', or words to that affect. So true. We pretty much all suppress emotions, it's the done thing as children, even through adulthood to most. But, once you become aware of what you're doing, as you say, simply allowing them to be, come to the surface, is enough.

They'll come when they're ready - you can't force it.

I had a real heavy knot in my solar plexus the other day, and it lasted for three days, just wouldn't go away. I got still, went within, and it took about three minutes before the tears started coming out of me

Such a thing of beauty, IMO.
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  #6  
Old 02-03-2018, 10:20 PM
Aislynn Aislynn is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2018
Posts: 9
 
Thank you both, Iamthat and OEN. I really connected with what you both said. I guess I thought I had dealt with things from all the years I spent in therapy. And while those years were certainly not wasted, I simply didn't expect such a surge of emotion. I wasn't even aware that it was to be expected and was ok. Nobody ever seems to tell you that it may happen when they tell you to try meditation.

I also never experienced anything like that with candle meditation, but then candle meditation was simply to relax and a way to calm anxieties. It wasn't like I went deep with it, that wasn't what I was attempting back then. But it makes complete sense that with deeper meditation that there would be a release. After all, if a box is filled with dirt and you shine a light into it, the light won't go past the top layer. In order to fill the box with light you need to first empty it.

I really like that quote- "you can only heal what you can feel". I think I'm going to put that on a few post its here and there as a reminder.

Is there any specific guided meditation you can recommend? I have been using Joe T. On YouTube. I really like his guided meditation to connect with your spirit guide. While I am not yet near clear enough for that at this time, I'm really able to feel the stone and smell the river. It all just seems to connect with me, maybe since I'm such a nature person, maybe because I love water and am a water sign, or maybe it's simply his voice and style. But I'm not reserving myself to just that. I feel I need to explore a bit more. So if anyone has any recommendations, I'd love to try them out.

Thank you again!

With peace, love and light,
~Ais
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  #7  
Old 03-03-2018, 06:22 AM
iamthat iamthat is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2017
Location: Golden Bay, New Zealand
Posts: 410
 
I tend not to use guided meditations but I am sure that others can recommend some some good ones.

A couple of thoughts:

You say that you are a water sign. Water is strongly associated with the emotions, the astral plane, the moon, etc. So that suggests that you are naturally sensitive and perhaps you tend to express yourself through the emotions. Maybe your challenge is to make your emotions your friend, not something to be suppressed or fought. Becoming comfortable with your emotions may be the key to finding serenity.

And as a nature person, perhaps you could consider walking in nature as a meditation, particularly if you have easy access to rivers or the sea. It sounds as if you would be very comfortable in that kind of environment, and also being in nature is very grounding. The element of earth will help to balance your strong water.

Just a thought.

Peace.
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  #8  
Old 03-03-2018, 08:28 AM
OEN34 OEN34 is offline
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Yeah, I don't use guided meditations, either. That's not to say they don't have their uses, as I started off using them, but I just don't get deeper enough within from guided ones.

There's no secret to it. I get very still, a few deep inhales and exhales to clear your openings, close my eyes and focus on my breath until it's settled, which can vary as to how long, then allow thoughts to come and go - and emotions - without labeling them, without doing a detour on them and starting a novel - just simply observe.

I actually find this is therapy. I really believe it helps bring emotions to the surface.

Fighting your emotions really won't help you get rid of them, as you know. Don't put your guard up, just let them do their thing. They'll come when they're ready :)
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  #9  
Old 03-03-2018, 12:08 PM
A human Being A human Being is offline
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Location: Manchester, England
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Some excellent advice from all contributors - good thread! For me, meditation is simply about allowing to arise with minimal resistance whatever needs to arise, whether that's agitation, restlessness, upset, or whatever. I think people do often have preconceptions about how their meditation is supposed to go, they think it's about having a quiet mind, or inner peace, or union with God, and so on, when for me it's really about throwing all those expectation out of the window and simply being present with whatever arises, without trying to manipulate one's experience. It can be very challenging, particularly if you're just starting out, and it does require patience and perseverance - and, as has been said, you can very often find yourself feeling worse, not better! But that's actually likely showing that it's working, funnily enough :)

Stick with it, AisLynn, it sounds like you're making good progress
Quote:
Originally Posted by OEN34
There's no secret to it. I get very still, a few deep inhales and exhales to clear your openings, close my eyes and focus on my breath until it's settled, which can vary as to how long, then allow thoughts to come and go - and emotions - without labeling them, without doing a detour on them and starting a novel - just simply observe.
I chuckled at the bit in bold - how did you know about my meditation practice! FYI I'm making excellent progress on my sequel to 'War & Peace'
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