What does the Ego get from sympathy?

Curious to hear what people have to say about this. What do I get for wanting people to feel bad for me? What am I trying to get reflected back to myself from other people?

I have been working on this for awhile but cant seem to gain any real depth. Any sight to the deeper levels of this would be much appreciated.

Thanks everyone.

[Saggi]

Originally Posted by Fairmountain

Curious to hear what people have to say about this. What do I get for wanting people to feel bad for me? What am I trying to get reflected back to myself from other people?

I have been working on this for awhile but cant seem to gain any real depth. Any sight to the deeper levels of this would be much appreciated.

Thanks everyone.

Wanting someone to 'feel bad', do you mean with pity, as low as you feel about it?

People can empathize with what you are feeling, although the majority of the time, it's love that is expressed to someone who is feeling low and in need,,,

So, maybe that's what you want, to be loved,,,

Love and hugs

Jo

XxXx

Originally Posted by Fairmountain

What do I get for wanting people to feel bad for me? What am I trying to get reflected back to myself from other people?

Sympathy extends support from those who haven't experienced you dilema ...
Empathy is support from those who've experienced the same situation ...
Both allow you to know you are not alone during those tough times as well as stroke the ego to keep on working toward resolution ...
Not all ego boosts are bad ...
They help w/self confidence, to help a person think & feel better of themself ...
It's like having a cheering squad to lift your spirits to clear the way to find others ways, more productive ways to deal w/the issue ...

A person who is egotistical will use sympathy to manipulate people ...

[blackraven]

Originally Posted by Fairmountain

Curious to hear what people have to say about this. What do I get for wanting people to feel bad for me? What am I trying to get reflected back to myself from other people?

I have been working on this for awhile but cant seem to gain any real depth. Any sight to the deeper levels of this would be much appreciated.

Thanks everyone.

Fairmountain - I think that when someone is in a dark place and feeling down, they would like to know that someone out there sympathizes and understands the position that they are in. It’s human nature to want others to care about us. I really don’t feel it’s an ego issue, but rather one of fellow empathy that we feel for others and expect of them as well. Personally I have been in a bad place and wanted others to know how much pain I was in, but after getting through that period and persevering, I no longer want anyone ever to know my ‘real’ pain again because I’m quite a private person and the feeling of being felt sorry for disturbs me for some reason. Ego does come into play in this case as I suppose I feel others would view me as weak so I put on a bold face for most. A good private cry usually does it for me. Good question, Fairmountain.

Blackraven

Originally Posted by blackraven

I no longer want anyone ever to know my ‘real’ pain again because I’m quite a private person and the feeling of being felt sorry for disturbs me for some reason.

Good point ...
When I was grieving the death of my husband I couldn't stand pity ...
It feels ugly - very close to being treated like a child ...
It is nowhere close to being sympathetic w/the loss of a loved one or any other dark issue ...
Sympathy is about care & concern for one's well being as well as supporting one as they journey into the unknown ...
I wish it could've been one good cry, but the "darkest hour" in this type of circumstance was years of crying from loss, physical pain & mental anguish ...
All is good now ...

[blackraven]

Originally Posted by livingkarma

Good point ...
When I was grieving the death of my husband I couldn't stand pity ...
It feels ugly - very close to being treated like a child ...
It is nowhere close to being sympathetic w/the loss of a loved one or any other dark issue ...
Sympathy is about care & concern for one's well being as well as supporting one as they journey into the unknown ...
I wish it could've been one good cry, but the "darkest hour" in this type of circumstance was years of crying from loss, physical pain & mental anguish ...
All is good now ...

livingkarma - I'm so very sorry for your horrific loss in life. How does one get through such pain? I can't imagine the dark place you were in for years. It's good to know you can smile now. You must be an incredibly strong-willed person to come out on the other side of such a tragedy.

Blackraven

Originally Posted by blackraven

livingkarma - I'm so very sorry for your horrific loss in life. How does one get through such pain? I can't imagine the dark place you were in for years. It's good to know you can smile now. You must be an incredibly strong-willed person to come out on the other side of such a tragedy.

Blackraven

Thank you for the condolences ...
My life was filled w/years of daily insanity screaming in pain at the gates of hell trying to claw myself out of the darkness ...
My spiritual beliefs & the constant grief monster beat downs to surrender my past to release the love of life made it all possible ...
It takes courage & strength to recover, to seek healing ...
I have faith in people that they will make a commitment to themself to resolve their issues as I have to enjoy a healthy mind & soul ...

[Emmalevine]

Personally I think people have a tendency to 'demonise' the ego..

Wanting sympathy from others usually stems from feeling a lack of something...love, attention, care, connectedness. Most of us experience that at times in our lives. It isn't uncommon to 'want' to feel bad in order to gain something from people. There is always a reason, and it usually goes back to love or its lack. Feeling 'needy' is something that some people feel ashamed of but we were all born with needs, that doesn't go away, and when our more profound needs were not met as children, it's natural to crave more of human love when older.

[CSEe]

Perhaps all emotions regardless desire , ego , greed , love , care , ego is all same and equal .........is ourselves and is always same ...is just human knowledge define it , differenciate it .
Thks
CSEe