How to respond to mean people?

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by hallow

An individuals truth is often only what they want to believe. And how often is that really true? There is a difference between truth and being honest. A lot of people don't like the truth unless you're honest with yourself.

You make it sound like I have a choice.

I have a question for you all. When does "I believe" turn into "I don't need to believe anymore?"

There is a very fine delineation of perception in these matters, which becomes the "personal truth" of the individual...and it IS true..but ONLY to that individual.

1: "I don't believe because I KNOW".
2. "You only BELIEVE that you know"
1: "You only BELIEVE that I BELIEVE that I know".
2: "You only BELIEVE that I BELIEVE that you BELIEVE...you know?"

[JosephineB]

Shivani Devi, have you ever tried directing your attention away from yourself and on to other people instead, trying to help them with issues you could help them with. Constantly trying to figure yourself out sounds exhausting.

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by JosephineBloggs

Shivani Devi, have you ever tried directing your attention away from yourself and on to other people instead, trying to help them with issues you could help them with. Constantly trying to figure yourself out sounds exhausting.

I have never learned how to do that and have not had anybody to teach me how, so nope.

I have had NO "role models".

Besides which, I am a living ball of introverted neuroses. I have seen the best "professionals" all my life..their prognosis? "learn to live/deal with how you ARE".

[Shivani Devi]

The ONLY thing I can do, is to stop trying to figure out the "mind of God" using meditation, which will stop all thoughts relating to my relative existence within the Unified Field as the "mirrored observer".

Thus, meditation becomes the only saviour for me not being able to relate to any concepts outside my own mind (seeing as how I created them all anyway).

I have lived in total isolation for 20 years..I have agoraphobia and have recently managed to get outside the confines of my 4 walls, my physical space, to go and see another psychiatrist and I find that getting out of my house is a LOT easier than getting out of myself.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.red...urotic_person/

The above is for my own edification later on.
*also researching MDMA*

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by Shivani Devi

I have never learned how to do that and have not had anybody to teach me how, so nope.

I have had NO "role models".

Besides which, I am a living ball of introverted neuroses. I have seen the best "professionals" all my life..their prognosis? "learn to live/deal with how you ARE".

That is not exactly true.

Due to not me not having any meaningful relationships with other people because of a lifetime of neglect and abandonment, I DID find a "role model" or rather, He found me...Shiva.

In a lot of ways, I am like Lord Shiva (a lot more than I will ever let myself admit).

I will not go "out of my way" to help others...I have tried that before and the results were disastrous. I wasn't expecting anything other than an "acknowledgement" that the person who I was helping could actually SEE me in this "reality" but my "helping self" remained totally invisible to them with not even a 'thanks for your time, Shivani...I will consider it".

As such, I decided that I was going to 'stay put' and if anybody wanted my help, they would need to approach ME and I will happily oblige their every request...like God does.

So far, nobody has beaten the weary track to my door because they are too proud/stubborn to ask for my help and I am not a bloody mind reader.

So, forget about trying to find out how God thinks...but at least I can fully relate to how the Almighty Divine FEELS...which means I do have a certain degree of empathy..just not towards other people.

[NoOne]

Hmm, your last two posts hit home quite hard, Shivani.

I did develop temporary agoraphobia back in 2012, right after the initial rise of my Kundalini. It didn't help, that I lived in London at the time…

I could not stay there with my condition and had to move back to small-town Hungary. I am fine now, but still sensitive to crowds. Still, I survived a music festival last week, without any issues, so I guess I'm cured.

With the helping issue…

I'm sort of done with it. Of course if somebody asks, I won't turn them away, but my days of actively soliciting and looking for people to help are gone. I agree, that people have to come to you and apply for help, otherwise you are pretty much wasting your time and energy. Most people are not ready to be helped, unless they acknowledge their problems and their root causes.

[JosephineB]

Originally Posted by NoOne

Hmm, your last two posts hit home quite hard, Shivani.

I did develop temporary agoraphobia back in 2012, right after the initial rise of my Kundalini. It didn't help, that I lived in London at the time…

I could not stay there with my condition and had to move back to small-town Hungary. I am fine now, but still sensitive to crowds. Still, I survived a music festival last week, without any issues, so I guess I'm cured.

With the helping issue…

I'm sort of done with it. Of course if somebody asks, I won't turn them away, but my days of actively soliciting and looking for people to help are gone. I agree, that people have to come to you and apply for help, otherwise you are pretty much wasting your time and energy. Most people are not ready to be helped, unless they acknowledge their problems and their root causes.

Try not to get disheartened, we can't win them all. I'm sure you've helped many. I always enjoy reading your posts.

[Miss Hepburn]

Originally Posted by EdmundJohnstone

How should someone respond to mean people? There are multiple options such as being mean back to them as well, not being mean to them and keeping the bad feelings and emotions inside, which in time will start to hurt, or being indifferent and try not to keep the emotions inside (sort of hard for myself)

Ideas that have worked for me..

You could calmly say back to them..
-Wow, you are in so much pain to be acting this way.
-This is the way your parents talked to you, isn't it?
-Why are you being so intense?
-I understand you're lashing out, but I'm not the enemy...someone else is...
take this out on THEM. Cuz I don't deserve this."

Then, pivot and walk away. Very powerful stuff...mainly cuz no one else has had the guts
and calm to say much to them...it shocks them.
Meanness is a form of manipulation...but they didn't manipulate you, ha...you saw thru them.
Meanness is a scream for help.

[dream jo]

i try to avod mean pepplee

[Guff779]

Mean people may be unhappy, insecure, have things going on in their own life, feel inferior, want to make themselves feel better. Could be anything.

Best thing is not to be sensitive, act, behave like you don't care and be relaxed.

Just ignore them.