friendships

[nakita]

Why is it that every time I meet someone or make a new friend it seems they have many issues and they always are in need of a lot of help?

I am not complaining at all I am just curious it always feels that everyone I meet no matter what has some big personal issues and I am always the one they want to confide in and I feel for them and feel that it is my job to help these people out and fix things that have been going on in their lives and help them live happier ones

Originally Posted by nakita

Why is it that every time I meet someone or make a new friend it seems they have many issues and they always are in need of a lot of help?

I am not complaining at all I am just curious it always feels that everyone I meet no matter what has some big personal issues and I am always the one they want to confide in and I feel for them and feel that it is my job to help these people out and fix things that have been going on in their lives and help them live happier ones

Sounds like you have a big ego.
First of all you are judging, second you are not God to fix everyone who has problems. It is not your job. Let them suffer enough to cry out to God, not you. That is what the ego does. Stop playing God.

Most people have many issues. Unfortunately in modern society people don't have any idea how to go about the sanitizing of their psyche and spirit, let alone spending any time doing the necessary dirty work.

Your not judging. That's an absurd comment. It is a noble idea that you wish to help these people especially if your are in the position (spiritually) to do so. However, I agree that it is not your responsibility to "fix" these peoples lives. They will never live a happier life so long as others are fixing their problems. Problems arise when we need to learn something and to bring us to wholeness (true happiness). No one can do this for another.

~Naddread~

It seems you might be an empath..people can sense that you are open and willing to listen to them..and this way ease on their burdens....
However it is your choice whom you let close and how much involved you get....your primordial responsibility is towards yourself....learn how to draw healthy boundaries...and find balance...
You don't have to 'fix' people....you were not meant to fix anyone...being there for people when they need you ...love them and accept them as they are... is already enough....

Originally Posted by nakita

Why is it that every time I meet someone or make a new friend it seems they have many issues and they always are in need of a lot of help?

I am not complaining at all I am just curious it always feels that everyone I meet no matter what has some big personal issues and I am always the one they want to confide in and I feel for them and feel that it is my job to help these people out and fix things that have been going on in their lives and help them live happier ones

Different people have different parts they play in society. Some are worker bees, some are inspirational speakers, some are counselors, some are leaders.... (Not necessarily by job title, but by who they are, by their personality).

Maybe your personality is like a counselor personality. And the fact that you see the problems is probably a part of your gift also. So be who you were born to be and do what you can with your gift.



I think that most people have some kind of a problem. In fact, the view of people in my mind at the moment is this: people are like a bunch of street children, with some disabilities, who were left to fend for themselves.

People don't understand their own problems, so how can they help themselves? It's a wonder we were able to do as much as we did.

It's an accomplishment that we did so much with the tools that we have (and the problems we have).

Originally Posted by Naddread

I agree that it is not your responsibility to "fix" these peoples lives.
~Naddread~

Whose responsibility is it to help people?

Maybe "fix" and "help" are different things (as far as definition)? To help someone is to give them necessary tools to make them the best they can be. NOT to make them do what you want them to do.

We are here to help each other. So if someone is willing to help someone else to live a happier life, it's a noble task.

[muileag]

Like Tani said, perhaps you're being called on to be that listening ear when there isn't another one around. It really isn't your "job" to "fix" anyone's problems or burdens, in fact, it's not only detrimental to yourself if you do so, but it also takes personal growth and power away from the person with the problem. But it's a great privilege to be able to offer a smile, kind word, and encouragement to a soul who's feeling overwhelmed.

These people are drawn towards other people who display certain traits, such as warmth, openness, nurturing, vulnerability, and willingness to help. I went from attracting tons to none just by changing my outward demeanor. If you don't want them to come to you, try not to advertise yourself as someone to come to.

Originally Posted by DayLight1555

Whose responsibility is it to help people?

Maybe "fix" and "help" are different things (as far as definition)?

That's what I was alluding to. It is our responsibility to speak and live Truth. This is greatest way to help anyone. But so long as someone is having someone else fix their problems they are not learning and growing towards Truth themselves.

Originally Posted by DayLight1555

To help someone is to give them necessary tools to make them the best they can be. NOT to make them do what you want them to do.

I agree

Originally Posted by DayLight1555

We are here to help each other. So if someone is willing to help someone else to live a happier life, it's a noble task.

Again I agree. This is basically what I wrote in my first post.

~Naddread~

Originally Posted by good day

Sounds like you have a big ego.
First of all you are judging, second you are not God to fix everyone who has problems. It is not your job. Let them suffer enough to cry out to God, not you. That is what the ego does. Stop playing God.

I agree with you to a point. Ego in "fixing things" yes. we can never really fix things in people but help them understand what it is that they may be going through. A person can only really help their own self.

He never stated that he is God and i think its unfair for you to put those words into his mouth. I do feel that it is everyones job to have a helping hand for our fellow existors. It seems that he naturally pulls these things out of people and that he should take it in naturally rather than giving himself the help people title.

Good Day, you may find all your help when on your knees crying to God, but not everyone believes in God being a separate entity from the whole of existence. Us being part of existence. So logically it would seem that confiding in each other is confiding in God. That is just my take :)

Hugs Good Day!