Golden Female Spirit?? and silver energy ball??

[15ahayes]

So background first, I remember having a sensation when i was a kid that would start from the top of my spine at the shoulders and work its way down to the tailbone area. It was a strong warm tingly sensation that happened when i was really relaxed and happy. it was a loving and warm sensation too. over the years i just kinda excepted it as normal and would even try to force the feeling because it was so nice and yet fleeting, lasting only 2-5 seconds. I come from a mormon/christian background (very interesting history btw, try searching channelings from joseph smith and the occult background) anyway because of this i attributed it to the holy ghost, well lately through my research and spirtiual awakening (pretty dope btw) I have come to realize and know the "holy ghost or spirit" as a feminine energy or spirit that is within all things, anyway during meditation this sensation can be "QUITE" strong and at times slightly sensual and VERY ecstatic like being doped up on heroin or ecstasy. and even more recently i get VERY strong and detailed images of a golden spirit or angel in a female form, very calm and gorgeous! she always has her eyes closed with her arms wrapped around me and her head lying on my shoulder, like a picture of an unbreakable bond of love (corny I know) but its dope as hell honestly haha and I dont know what it is but i feel like i have a bond with a feminine something and the love between it would shatter the universe itself, i being graphic but thats how strong the bond is, its like a deep knowing of love and respect.

also, i dont know if this is connected or not but i recieve messages through song and its always some female and even one time i was attacked by an extremely strong entity whose force was pressing against me so strong i thought is would pierce my skin, i overpowered it with love energy but it came back twice as strong and began to enter my body (scary as hell haha but im telling the truth) that was when i saw in my minds eye VERY clearly a silver energy ball that floated down slowly and filled my entire body, cleansing me and dispelling the entity or spirit. later I found that silver energy was connected to feminine power/energies,

also i was reaching out with my sexual energies and innerself during meditation to the whatever that i was so connected to and the strongest energy i have ever felt slowly worked it way down my body like a slithering snake starting from the crown and connecting with the sacral chakra, haha it only lasted maybe a full 10- 15 seconds because it was so intense it knocked me out of my meditation but needless to say it was better than sex! haha!
anyway, does anyone have answers for any of this??

[Crystal Ambassador]

It sounds like you have a really strong bond to the feminine aspect of the Source/Higher Power/God/Goddess. The sensation of energy running down your spine is reminiscent of a technique I use as a client in therapy where I envision healing energy coming down my spine through my skull to my pelvis. It's very effective for chakra cleansing, as well as centering, and I suspect it's something your spirit helper is doing to help you stay healthy as a whole.

I know that when I imagine the Source, I sometimes see them manifested as a golden eagle or some other gold-light presence. It would make sense that you would have a response to music and see the Goddess's healing orb as silver; in many cultures, feminine energy is associated with the moon and water. The moon and water energies are intertwined and in turn associated with silver, and music resonates with the energy of water. They all work to point towards you having an especially strong connection with the Mother Goddess. It's fantastic to hear you have such a strong impression of her presence and healing, and that she is so active in helping you.

I have also noticed that in times of spiritual-induced relaxation, the feeling of calmness and completeness - of being supported and loved by the universe and spirits - has a deep resonant peace that is almost impossible to match physically. Music is something I connect with as well, as I feel it has a way of communicating things that words alone cannot.

[Wyaunagh]

First off I would like to say that I know what it is like to come from a Mormon home and then realize there is more out there. I was raise in a Mormon family and now practice something vaguely Pagan at home, as well as being a part of a cross tradition circle group.

It sounds like you have a very strong connection with the divine Feminine, whatever you may call her. The bright, golden energy you described is reminiscent of several Feminine deities. You don't necessarily have to put a name on her, but it might be wise to get to know her - figure out her likes and dislikes, personality traits, quirks... you get the idea. to do this you just need to spend time with her in a seance. you might try meditation, or even just talking to her. This can work a lot better then you expect. Just remember to listen too, the answers may not be what you expect.

I know a name for her may not be important, but be careful not to confine her to concepts of the divine you may have been taught in the past. Just let her be who she is. I once got an ear full for addressing a goddess who turned out to be Bride (also called Brigid), the way i would have addressed the Mormon 'Heavenly Mother'. Oops. So that is why identity is important.

Also a question about the music. I am curious do the messages you get convey meaning in the form of words, just energy and emotion or both? There is a reason i ask. Some of the most powerful music in spirituality does not have words; It is more of singing what one feels to a rhythm. Feel free to message me if you want. i am here if you want to talk about anything.