has anyone died f om suicide in a past life or attempted and had an nde?

[JosephineB]

Originally Posted by iamthat

My theory is based on Theosophy/Alice Bailey. In brief simple terms, the human being is a triplicity of Monad (Spirit/Being), Soul (consciousness) and personality. The Soul has countless incarnations in different personalities to reach the point where consciousness changes its outward focus to an inward focus, the purpose being to identify with its source, the Monad.

Instead of an external pressure to incarnate, I consider that incarnation is driven by an inner impulse for the Soul to return to its source. Sitting around on a cloud does not achieve this. Choosing not to incarnate does not achieve this.

Some people fondly imagine that at the end of this lifetime they can choose where to go next on some higher plane of consciousness or even some other planet. To use a simple comparison, this seems like a teenager dropping out of high school because they don't like it but expecting to go on to college. We move on when we have graduated. Until then, we have more learning to do.

Peace.

Right, so to change the outward to inward focus, I can see that. Then return to source. Then I presume the whole thing starts again?

Souls have impulses?

Funny you should mention high school/college. This is what I was thinking about, the pressures in this life. School, college, career ladder, family, children etc. What if one doesn't want that. Maybe they don't feel like doing any of that. And instead be an artist their whole life, making little money, living in a modest place. Nothing wrong with that. Sounds fantastic actually. A worthwhile contribution. Would be nice to have the choice. So this is my concern. Maybe soul doesn't pressure itself, it's another influence. I get the idea of developement. But thousands upon thousands of times. No, something's off.

[JosephineB]

I just read this on another thread by SF member John32241: "Our experiences on earth are doing some thing beyond the understanding of the human intellect. I am told it is energy work. As much as we try to grasp why we are here, the real reason can not be found. However I suspect it has to do with expanding the energy of love." I hope John is right, and it's not some other sinister reason.

[linen53]

Originally Posted by BlueSkiez

Thanks for sharing linen53. Have you heard of overlapping lives? It means basically what it says, it's almost like being unable to really die, like say someone dies, they know it but they're still alive, as if they had another version of them/their body, and they just switched consciousness to the other body.

I asked because I am wondering how you recalled this past life. With overlapping lives (I just call it that) you aware of amd experience dying, and a sort of reincarnation.l, just not to a completely different life not starting over from scratch.

I'm pretty sure that I committed suicide too in one of these previous versions. I experienced a life review too, as the same person I am today, just a younger when I had the review. My life has also been terrible and traumatic.

Anyway I was curious how you remembered the time between lives and your past life. If you want to share

My answer is very long and complicated. I will try to keep it simple and short. My answer encompasses several experiences. The first one I had selective amnesia most of my youth and young adult life in this incarnation. When I was in my 30's childhood memories came flooding in. I've read when this occurs there is actually a part of the brain that becomes active. Amongst those horrible childhood memories my guides and angels threw in a few memories of my life between lives. That tiny shred of hope was the only thing that kept me from committing suicide. One of those memories was the past life suicide and subsequent life I lived afterwords before I reincarnated. Another memory of a past life that is unrelated to this missive was once when I lived as a Nordic warrior.

Secondly, the second experience was in 2012. I got West Nile Meningitis. That is the West Nile flu and inflammation of the lining of the brain and the spine. I ended up with brain damage. You think of brain damage as losing part of your brain, and in some ways that is true, but in my case I also accessed certain things on the other side of the veil. I witnessed happenings. I wrote it all down because I knew I would eventually forget it if I didn't.

Now with this time I also had two lucid dreams of other me's that are concurrently living their lives as I live this one. We are all here learning different things. We don't share deaths. We live entirely different lives.

One of the me's I saw lived in a large city with tall modern buildings. I kind of just dropped in on her (unseen) to observe her. She was walking down the street. She was smart, slender, dressed as a business woman. She looked up to one of the tall buildings and I knew she was looking up to where she worked. There was such a feeling of achievement and pride at what she had accomplished to get where she was at that time. Then she sensed someone was next to her (me). She turned in my direction but of course she couldn't see me. I popped out of there so as not to disturb her anymore.

The second me lived on a different planet. Orange skies. No mountains, hills. Stunted vegetation. This setting was different. She saw me and came to me in greeting, welcoming me. We recognized each other and embraced. She was plump, graceful, kind and wore a dress that flowed down her body graciously. I knew instantly, her background. She had been raised in a loving family and she was an artist. She invited me to go through a small rickety wooden gate into her domain. Lol, there was no fence on either side, just the gate and a rundown archway of sorts, but squared not rounded. She wanted to show me her home, family and art work. That's all I remember.

------------

I can only speak for myself BlueSkiez, but when I reincarnated into this life, I chose to have a very bad lifetime to make up for all the failures in the past. So really I can't be angry, mad or rage at anyone but myself and I won't do that either.

[bluelotus]

Originally Posted by linen53

Thanks Native. I found this.

Yes, I commit suicide in a past life in the colonial era. Early America. My father owned a prosperous large farm (I don't think it was a plantation, but I'm not sure). There was me and my sister. We were both mostly grown. Our mother was dead or at least she didn't live with us and we had an overbearing father.

I was raped by my father's right hand man, his foreman. I knew he guarded our virginity with a tight hand for marriage purposes. I was terrified of him finding out that I was no longer a virgin. That he would blame me.

I snuck in the kitchen and stole one of the knives while the cook was busy doing other things. I found an isolated shed or barn of some sort, sat down and cut my wrists. I remember I was wearing a pink dress with eyelet decorations on the ruffles and edges. I watched at the red blood soaked into the pink cloth.

Let me know if you have any further questions or want to know the consequences of that action.

Ok what were the consequences of your actiond? Do you remember anything that you can research to verify your memories?

[linen53]

Originally Posted by JosephineBloggs

Linen. Do you have any theory on the ultimate purpose for all this. In the life review, what do you think would happen if soul were to say no, no more reincarnation?

I have learned, for me anyway, this is school. We have such a desire to advance spiritually. To be closer to our Creator whatever you interpret that to be. I've heard (as I'm sure you have) that Earth is one of the hardest places to go to school.

When I was young (in this lifetime), I used to think I had some ultimate "purpose" here. I constantly was striving to find out what that was. I hesitate to use the the word ego; I think it is overused here muchly. But in this case I have to say, this was my ego talking (having purpose). Once I realized I was just a lowly student, life actually became less bumpy. My life lessons were recognized as just that, life lessons, not some punishment for past behaviors.

We all start out with fun reincarnations as young souls with lots of adventures! But as we get older (soul age) lessons become harder and painful. The ultimate goal for some souls (middle age to old souls) is to not reincarnate anymore. For me I have hated reincarnating for many lifetimes. It was like I was spinning my wheels and getting no where each time. Much frustration occured. I began hating reincarnating. But it was the fastest way of advancing so I kept trying.

No one has to reincarnate here once we get past a certain (soul) age. That is, once you know you don't have to; another tidbit of information that we all learn here (learning to think for yourself). And when you begin thinking for yourself is when you begin breaking away from the "group" that you were formerly attached to.

[linen53]

Originally Posted by bluelotus

Ok what were the consequences of your actiond? Do you remember anything that you can research to verify your memories?

Consequences, as in committing suicide? There are no consequences. Other than personal feelings of failure.

No, and I don't need to research or verify. I am learning to follow my heart, not my head. For you, I'm sure that sounds absurd, but to me I have all the validation I need.

[JosephineB]

Truth? I don't know. I've just been reading this. How to exit the reincarnation system:

http://howtoexitthematrix.com/2016/1...nation-system/

[~Lioness~]

Originally Posted by JosephineBloggs

I just read this on another thread by SF member John32241: "Our experiences on earth are doing some thing beyond the understanding of the human intellect. I am told it is energy work. As much as we try to grasp why we are here, the real reason can not be found. However I suspect it has to do with expanding the energy of love." I hope John is right, and it's not some other sinister reason.

Actually, I definitely agree 100% with this. I found in a near death experience I had, my very own spirit. Scary as my spirit simply sank into the earth, all by itself, it felt so lonely. I'd like to bring love into my exit from this world, so I dont have to experience that complete loneliness again. ♡

[iamthat]

Originally Posted by JosephineBloggs

Right, so to change the outward to inward focus, I can see that. Then return to source. Then I presume the whole thing starts again?

Souls have impulses?

Funny you should mention high school/college. This is what I was thinking about, the pressures in this life. School, college, career ladder, family, children etc. What if one doesn't want that. Maybe they don't feel like doing any of that. And instead be an artist their whole life, making little money, living in a modest place. Nothing wrong with that. Sounds fantastic actually. A worthwhile contribution. Would be nice to have the choice. So this is my concern. Maybe soul doesn't pressure itself, it's another influence. I get the idea of developement. But thousands upon thousands of times. No, something's off.

I use the word impulse in the true sense of an inner drive to action. So the Soul has an inner drive to identify with its source, the Monad or our true Being.

You suggest that the whole thing then starts again. I would qualify that by saying the process continues on a higher turn of the spiral. Monadic consciousness is the prerequisite to move on to a higher sphere of learning and service. Which is why I question the belief that people can simply choose to move on when the personality has had enough of physical life. Without Monadic consciousness they lack the ability to function in these higher spheres.

The analogy of high school/college only applies to a limited extent (like all analogies). On this level of existence a person may choose a different path in life, rejecting material success to pursue personal fulfilment in other ways. On the spiritual journey we somehow have to raise our consciousness to the required level in order to move on.

As for how many lifetimes this might take, who knows. We can only speculate.

Peace

I have read a lot of linen53's postings and all that I can say is that I have a lot of respect for her.