Going to be 25 this year , still no relationship

[*Red-Bird*]

Are you making the decisions to not continue dating the guys you have seen in the past or did the guys decide they weren't interested?

[Endless_Love_2_You]

Hey
HereAndNow, thanks for responding.Yeah I know subconsciously I am putting it out in the universe that I don't want a relationship.Honestly I don't feel ready to be emotionally invested in someone just yet.I don't feel complete with myself.Then apart of me is asking "When are you going to be complete? When are you going to be ready to let someone in? Someone can love you , for you, who you are right now is able to be loved." It's like I am in a constant battle.

[Endless_Love_2_You]

Thanks for responding girlsearching, you basically explained my life perfectly.I am in a constant struggle with accepting who I am now.I believe my life and who I am right now as a person needs work.I am masterpiece that is unfinished.The thought of someone excepting me right now is unrealistic to me.Which now I understand why I am not in a relationship right now because I feel its always going to be out of reach.Every time I did throw myself out there and talked to guys I was attracted to I crumbled and felt vunerable,needy and unwanted.It never worked out for me because I put those guys before me.Which I learned never to do.It's funny how you learn the particular taste some men have and you ask yourself " why them and not me?" its a bit narcissistic, but you realized that you could have been yourself and he probably could have liked you.But like hereandnow said"in life everything happens exactly when it's meant to happen." Life has a funny way of being unpredictable.

[Endless_Love_2_You]

"Are you making the decisions to not continue dating the guys you have seen in the past or did the guys decide they weren't interested?"

Thanks for responding *redbird*, it's always the guys who weren't interested in me.I guess I didn't vibe with them, I was overwhelming.I hate being lied to or having my time wasted.I am a very honest person with my feelings and not all guys like a vocal woman.I need to learn how to tune it down and not be so blunt.I guess it goes in a complete circle for me, all the guys I am interested are all similar to the guys I like in the past and then lose interest in me.I never get to the second round I guess.Even though I have changed many things about me I still act like my past self when it comes to love..I need to work on that.

[H:O:R:A:C:E]

Endless_Love_2_You: I guess it goes in a complete circle for me

Machineheart, Vanic ~ Circles
https://vimeo.com/128391438

[H:O:R:A:C:E]

Originally Posted by girlsearching

I'm not in a relationship either. I'm not ready for one because I'm still learning how to love myself for once. I have struggled with low self-esteem for for 8 years now. If I can't learn to be alone and be confident with myself than I don't need to be in a relationship. I have always been weird around guys I found attractive but they were always unavailable to me. I used to get discouraged that my peers were in relationship and I wasn't .I finally realized that it was a sign letting me know that I fully needed to concentrate on myself.

in all likelihood, you're fine just the way you are. you don't need to change
anything about yourself so as to "be ready" for a relationship; you just
need to relate and enjoy the process.

Billy Joel ~ Just the Way You Are
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PmkQ1i_txYk

[HereAndNow]

Originally Posted by Endless_Love_2_You

I don't feel complete with myself.Then apart of me is asking "When are you going to be complete? When are you going to be ready to let someone in? Someone can love you , for you, who you are right now is able to be loved."

Yes, you don't need to be complete or perfect to be in a relationship and share love with someone. No-one is :)
And you don't have to be able to be everything for another person in a relationship ... you can just give what you have ... and that's plenty!

[LiberatedLotus]

There are people that have been in hundreds of relationships
& are probably more confused, lost, disillusioned, insecure, broken, miserable, unhappy,
and unloved than ones who've never been.

Trust me.

The grass is not always greener on the other side.

I found a soulmate at 19 & he was 27.
No prior experience. This man seemingly
had everything going for him & could have
had anyone. Probably been through
thousands of women. Within 3 months of
communication he wanted to marry me.
We hit it on every level: sexually, physically,
emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.
Unfortunately, due to him being my darker
side & forces beyond either of our control
after 3 years we went our separate ways.
Nonetheless it was a testament to the fact
that quality will always surpass quantity.
Know your inherent power & potential.
You can have anyone you desire, just be
careful for what you desire. Nothing
is what it appears to be, ever.

Also, never look outside yourself for completion, acceptance, love, validity, peace,
comfort, or security. All is within. Once mastered, then it will all fall into place.
But make sure the other individual
is at that same level.

[Aquamarine]

There are people in really good relationships that are in no way very "together" themselves. They are just loved for who they are and where they are in life at that moment by their partner. The only difference between them and someone else who thinks that they have to be perfect to be loved is the belief that they have to be perfect to be loved. Self acceptance. Its their belief in what they feel they deserve from life.

All of this is much more easy to say than to do because it is not something that one can decide to believe - it has to be something that resonates as the truth within the person and that can be very challenging. These are things that have to be known from a persons inner being, not just something we think in our brain.

[Endless_Love_2_You]

Thank you Horace! I love your music references! Machineheart, Vanic ~ Circles is my favorite new song <3 I am going to get into that state of readiness(: Thanks for the Billy Joel too