Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Badcopyinc
I found myself thinking the same thing a year ago. Then realized i wasn't ready. I was still harboring stuff from my past relationship. and then throwing in learning all i have and changing my taste or removing it completely when it comes to females. I wondered how will i ever really find anyone who is as corny and oddball as myself let alone believes the same things i do now? who is focused on loving themselves and not relying on me for their happy.
then it hit me from a post on here a few months back and i don't remember which one exactly but i do remember thinking it was pointless to allow myself to worry about when and who ill be with in the future. it wasn't doing anything but taking away from the present and my current goal. Me working on making myself a better person in every way. how can i believe that I/the universe is all knowing and gives me what i need when i need it but still try to pick what i need when half the time i don't realize what i need when i need it. By diverting my focus back to me and only me I'm making myself better for the day when i start a relationship. it will make that experience that much better for me and her when that day comes. It could be here now but I'm letting what happens happen and enjoying it for what it is. id rather give things the opportunity to grow instead of worrying about when and if they will. I miss to much beauty when I'm focused on how i want things to be. instead of enjoying how they are.
easier said than done but its my tactic when it comes to relationships.
|
Thank you for that - I will take note and try to implant that mindset into my rational brain. :)
Maybe I'm supposed to be 'alone' for a little bit longer so I can find out more about myself. After all, this is the first time I've been really single in about 7 years.
Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Shoni7510
Have you considered that perhaps you could be commitment phobic as a result of your past and present experiences? I knew a guy who outwardly seemed to be pursuing relationships but he was afraid of women, in fact he hated them and was commitment phobic. But in any event you are still way too young to think that you are destined to be single. You will meet your girl when the time is right and everything will just fall into place.
|
I'm disappointment - phobic. I'm not afraid of women, in fact the opposite. But I'm very selective nowadays because I'm very afraid of people who don't stay true to their word, like I do. That's my #1 factor in deciding in a person and so far I've yet to meet someone who can make me 'calm' on the inside as to completely trust her with my time, emotions and etc..
Quote:
|
Originally Posted by PhoenixNine
A whole year, hmm? Try almost 5! I think that without this time on my own I would not have developed certain parts of myself though. Also, I refuse to actively 'look'...when the time is right I will meet someone.....maybe...I have certain things I would like in a partner...Easygoing, sense of humor, etc<<<normal things...but then others like being into certain kinds of music, non-dogmatic wider existential view of Existence, and able to be responsible and partake recreational chemistry...not an very easy combination to find in another....most are already married.
|
I've grown immensely since the last time I was in a relationship, which was a year ago. But the more I grow, the more I'm less likely to be in a relationship because of how reality doesn't seem to match with what I truly want in a relationship. But I do know I don't want to live alone because its more 'fun' to have someone with me; not necessarily because I'm dependent on having a partner but I want to enjoy my life with someone. If that makes sense.
Linear Mode
