How can I let go of my belief that I'm crazy?

[IndigoViolet]

I will not dwell in this issue but somehow, the details of all this is already out of my control.

Originally Posted by SerendipityLizard

Ever since this whole spiritual awakening from a year ago, I've been doubting myself over and over. The ideas about higher self, mediumship, nonduality, reiki, and many other topics still blow my mind.

It's just that it's been overwhelming to transition from strong atheism to strong spiritualism about the world very suddenly. Well, not exactly suddenly, but it feels that way everyday.

One of the things that overwhelm me is the idea that I'm a lightworker on Earth. I've been living here with multiple lifetimes since the start of mankind, and next time, I'll still be in for the ride.

I have a very strong sense of purpose then, and with avoiding it all my life, without it, I feel empty. I've even felt strong suicidal thoughts before if I ignored this need to act on my sense of purpose, and something about growing enormously fills me with passion.

But I still want to avoid it. I don't want that responsibility. I don't want all the trials of growing and developing. I don't want the big vision of sharing some powerful ideas and talents I could have in the future. A huge part of me just wants to be normal, but as I go through life, moving away from my deep love for purpose is pure suffering. I want to be safe, yet I'm always moving for the "crazy" choice no matter how afraid I am.

Something tells me I'm supposed to do something big here, but I don't want to follow that. I'm not special. I don't want to be overly egotistical. I'm not ready to just merge with oness and all there is. I don't want to attract so much attention that people will reject, criticize or disagree with me -- but something tells me that I have to speak out. Speak out for something, but what is it? I don't want to know.

How can I just let go and follow through?

I went through this too at one time. I battled "I must be crazy" thoughts with "I am becoming enlightened" and "I just wanna be normal." It takes time to process it all. You will learn much more along the way and your perceptions will change along the way. Moving for the crazy choice no matter how afraid you are shows your courage. You are on a good path to self enlightenment. Doubt raised my curiosity, it brought me much confusion and heart ache, but sifting though the doubt, I finally found answers that satisfied me. You will too.

[SerendipityLizard]

Originally Posted by Gracey

I went through this too at one time. I battled "I must be crazy" thoughts with "I am becoming enlightened" and "I just wanna be normal." It takes time to process it all. You will learn much more along the way and your perceptions will change along the way. Moving for the crazy choice no matter how afraid you are shows your courage. You are on a good path to self enlightenment. Doubt raised my curiosity, it brought me much confusion and heart ache, but sifting though the doubt, I finally found answers that satisfied me. You will too.

Thank you.

[Compendium]

SL it doesnt always matter what you believe in per se you impact the world around you no matter what. Your smile alone can save a life or change a life path. Kindness goes a very long way.

What does the ascension process mean to you?

I too feel crazy at times....like I have lost all common sense. What can make it worse at least for me is I am diagnosed Bipolar with psychosis. When all my baggage had finally been worked through I felt so free and light. I was talking to my son about other dimensions and the places we visit in our sleep and he specifically asked me if I was having an episode. That was a kick in the heart chakra, I had to go back and reevaluate everything so I could determine it was not actually an episode. Which it is not, but I still feel off because of it.

Namaste`

[SerendipityLizard]

Originally Posted by Compendium

SL it doesnt always matter what you believe in per se you impact the world around you no matter what. Your smile alone can save a life or change a life path. Kindness goes a very long way.

What does the ascension process mean to you?

I too feel crazy at times....like I have lost all common sense. What can make it worse at least for me is I am diagnosed Bipolar with psychosis. When all my baggage had finally been worked through I felt so free and light. I was talking to my son about other dimensions and the places we visit in our sleep and he specifically asked me if I was having an episode. That was a kick in the heart chakra, I had to go back and reevaluate everything so I could determine it was not actually an episode. Which it is not, but I still feel off because of it.

Namaste`

I’ll try to remember what you said about kindness. I usually have very high standards for myself, so it’s nice to be affirmed about it even if it’s the same advice over and over.

I’m sorry you’re going through something similar, Compedium. I guess I still have feelings of being crazy — especially since I recently realized that AA Michael and my Higher Self has the exact same vibration . . . which probably means they’re the same person.

Not sure how to react to this, really. Probably explains why I can channel Michael for long essays in The Wind Over The Sun thread and can talk to him for the whole day. That, or having the same aura color.

That, or having the same strengths of courage, truth and childlike joy his role as an archangel is at my best mood. Or even the feeling that I’ve “merged” with him in thoughts and feelings at times.

Yeah, that’s going to settle in my head a little . . . not so quickly. Haha, maybe I’m crazy. Maybe I’m not.

Who knows?

[John32241]

Originally Posted by SerendipityLizard

I’m sorry you’re going through something similar, Compedium. I guess I still have feelings of being crazy — especially since I recently realized that AA Michael and my Higher Self has the exact same vibration . . . which probably means they’re the same person.

Not sure how to react to this, really. Probably explains why I can channel Michael for long essays in The Wind Over The Sun thread and can talk to him for the whole day. That, or having the same aura color.

That, or having the same strengths of courage, truth and childlike joy his role as an archangel is at my best mood. Or even the feeling that I’ve “merged” with him in thoughts and feelings at times.

Yeah, that’s going to settle in my head a little . . . not so quickly. Haha, maybe I’m crazy. Maybe I’m not.

Who knows?

Hi,

My understanding is that this "exact same vibration" represents a Soul Family. These things are all quite fasinating actually.

This "merged" with him in thoughts and feelings is a telepathic shared experience often seen in science as a quantum entanglement.

We do need to relax and accept the potentias that may be we are crazy or may be we are not.

There was a comment from a movie I watched the other day. Some one said "that none of us know as much as we think we know About Anything". That is because the human brain, as amazing as it is, is confined when compared to our deeper inner knowing.

So I just keep putting the puzzle pieces together the best way that I can and have fun with my entire human adventure.

John

[SerendipityLizard]

Originally Posted by John32241

Hi,

My understanding is that this "exact same vibration" represents a Soul Family. These things are all quite fasinating actually.

This "merged" with him in thoughts and feelings is a telepathic shared experience often seen in science as a quantum entanglement.

We do need to relax and accept the potentias that may be we are crazy or may be we are not.

There was a comment from a movie I watched the other day. Some one said "that none of us know as much as we think we know About Anything". That is because the human brain, as amazing as it is, is confined when compared to our deeper inner knowing.

So I just keep putting the puzzle pieces together the best way that I can and have fun with my entire human adventure.

John

What do you mean by a soul family? What’s that? Okay, when I google it says a soul family are people who are different aspects of the same soul. Wow. Is it possible to have this relationship with an archangel or some other higher being?

All I remember as a medium is that it would explain why other spirits I know seem to metaphorically call me “Michael’s daughter,” on a very consistent basis — which I was . . . rather confused about.

Uhh . . . that would explain the moronically gifted powers that I gained extremely quickly.

Haha, well. . . that’s a lot to take in.

[John32241]

Originally Posted by SerendipityLizard

What do you mean by a soul family? What’s that? Okay, when I google it says a soul family are people who are different aspects of the same soul. Wow. Is it possible to have this relationship with an archangel or some other higher being?

All I remember as a medium is that it would explain why other spirits I know seem to metaphorically call me “Michael’s daughter,” on a very consistent basis — which I was . . . rather confused about.

Yes this is a confusing subject. I was given an insight some time ago about how soul families are put together.

The human being is an entity for want of a better word like soul. There is an entity creation process that goes something like this. When a collective group of entities wishes to create another entity, they invest part of them selves into another energy grouping. This newly created entity can be called an over soul. The over soul will split itself into three unique reflections of itself with some energetic distinctions made for its body, mind, and spirit attributes. Each of these three split again into two groups with attribute distinctions made for the As Above, So Below energies. The over soul now has six unique reflections of itself. One last split takes place to create twelve unique reflections of its energetic signature with slight alterations in the masculine and feminine attributes.

I would say at this point that 'creating another entity' is more like an energy cluster. These clusters are like links to other life expressions within the Over Soul Family. My research into these things has been that some one I consider a soul sister to me will have links to another soul sister which I do not have. So that part sure confuses me.

All this ties into the Twin Soul experience, which I have had. It is also why the subject itself is a topic of interest to me.

I hope these thoughts add better clarity and not more confusion.

John

[Compendium]

SL i honestly belive you are channeling AA Micheal and that this is not just your higherself. Some of it may be, but some of it is Micheal.

We are our own harshest critique. We have to learn to cut ourselves some slack. I honestly do not believe you or I or anyone else is crazy in regards to the subject of becoming more aware. Our planet and our minds are amazing we are simply discovering it.

[SerendipityLizard]

Originally Posted by John32241

Yes this is a confusing subject. I was given an insight some time ago about how soul families are put together.



I would say at this point that 'creating another entity' is more like an energy cluster. These clusters are like links to other life expressions within the Over Soul Family. My research into these things has been that some one I consider a soul sister to me will have links to another soul sister which I do not have. So that part sure confuses me.

All this ties into the Twin Soul experience, which I have had. It is also why the subject itself is a topic of interest to me.

I hope these thoughts add better clarity and not more confusion.

John

That’s interesting. It does help. What did you mean by quantum entanglement by the way? It got over my head.