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Originally Posted by lillyj
But thats my question really is it a normal reaction to doing the self love affirmation. Too open up more to the love of others.?
I often feel great love for myself while at other times i only want someone else to love me and i cant stand that people arent that way to each other. What is it that is making me so intensely desiring it. Its just so strong. I feel like i dont want to carry on with it as its making me feel unbalanced a bit. But i suppose it passes. I dont want to feel needy. Maybe thats something i need to address. And its coming up so i can release it.
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I don't think it's "normal" in the normal sense of the word, even with affirmations but as you seem to have worked out it's a deep longing to be loved. No need to be anxious, though. To me it's about developing confidence and charisma. When others react positively it's initially superficial - because in most situations the people don't know each other from Adam and have to respond just to their intuition. They may not have the same depth of feeling.
There's
nothing wrong with it, though. It's a wonderful way to be. It is you, therefore you're entitled to be as you are. Just that perhaps you need to manage your expectations of others down a couple of notches. Send out your love and just leave it at that. Inwardly feel the hug if you also feel the person receptive. (I used to do this by building up a pink aura and firing bits of it off at people - a way of "inducting" your love in others. But that's because I'm a person who is happiest when people are just being themselves. I don't want to attract their love in any respect. It's usually enough to sense if they're capable or not.)
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Any suggestions for how i release the neediness side of love in me?
What does healthy love for another look like. Does it have desire attached to it? Or is it just totally let the other person be free and you can sustain yourself enough you dont need loads coming from others. but if it comes great. Is that more like it?
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You can't without changing things about yourself (simply because this comes from you). There seem to be two possibilities - the complicated way: you have to rationalise why you feel this way. It means looking as far back as you can into your earliest memories and pondering on the love you received as a child, the scrapes you got into (where love / yearning / desire may be a factor); when you first felt the need for being hugged etc. All of which may help you to understand why you are as you are. Naturally it needs two things: ruthless honestly - and time. It'll take a fair bit of focused meditation, contemplation, etc., and perhaps affirmations relating to self assurance. Let's defer that to a later chapter, shall we? But do you really want to dim it down?
And there's the simpler way. Ask yourself truly - is it wrong? The answer's NO, of course. No need for anxiety / self-consciousness. When you encounter someone just pause just to realise that they may not be on the same level as you; probably won't have the same openness, and just send them love in some form... charismatically opening yourself to reception but not expecting anything back (such as a hug). Imagine as you send love at them, drawing them close, all very smiling and happy.
As for what love looks like - everyone has their own ideas. To me it's a total appreciation of what someone brings to your life and awareness of what you take to theirs; a readiness to support in times of adversity; a willingness to compromise; a physical attraction that makes them huggable (doesn't have to entail sex) - and an amount of self-discipline - there will be bad days and they have to be resolved. A tip from mum was:
always resolve any argument / dispute / worries before you two go to sleep of the night.
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Im a little worried i might be doing something energeticaly with others. In another thread it said about stealing others energy and i said i didnt think i stole but thought i was trying to merge with others all the time and i feel thats wrong they might not want that.
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Whenever you interact with someone even in the smallest ways you're exchanging energies. That in itself can't be wrong because it's the way it is. But motive comes into this. If your aim is self-gratification or for gain/control then it can be spiritually damaging. (To ordinary folk it's mild vampirism, for the victim, dispiriting.) You'll see plenty of this in the twin-flames section of the forum. But there is nothing wrong with sending out love as long as it's without counting the cost.
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Its sort of intrusive. So i think thats happening alot more as well when im physicaly around someone. Though i have noticed people seem alot happier around me and much more smiley than usual and my cats have changed and are more purring and more coming to sit with me alot like they enjoying my energy.
So do you think thats a problem that i could be intruding on others energy field by being too touchy feely with my energy. Its like im energeticaly hugging everyone is that wrong?
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No, not at all. Of course if you did go around hugging people in practice you'd raise a few eyebrows, otherwise no. But, like I say, don't
expect a return gesture, just be glad if you feel it, like you seem to be today, people happy all around you.
Bests,
Lorelyen.
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