I feel lost =\

Originally Posted by Enchanted_DreamFaerie

I'm not sure what to believe in anymore, I thought I knew what to follow but now I don't follow any religion; I just follow what inside my heart and what I feel is right. Am I a bad person. There's some things that happened to me when I was younger and it traumatized me, ever since than I've always felt like a lost soul and not sure what to follow or what to believe in. I love crystals and I mediate whenever I feel stressed out but when it comes to religion I don't follow anything. There's times where I feel lost and other times I tell myself that there's nothing wrong with what I'm doing and why do I always need someone to tell me that I'm not a bad person but deep down I feel like I'm a bad person. I suffer from low self esteem and depression and that's what turned me into spirituality, but my step father tells me I'm worshiping the devil every time he see's me playing with my Tarot & Oracle Cards.... and again I feel like I'm such a bad person. Why am I constantly feeling like a horrible person. Will I forever be doomed and lost forever?

No you are not a bad person and you are not doomed forever ..... lost on the other hand, may last for awhile but that is not unusual.

Suggest you read "The Wisdom of the Tarot by Elisabeth Hatch" , it will show you more deeply that it conceals the WAY back to the Divine. God did not create RELIGIONS nor any divisions among men, women, nations, cultures. Jesus, Buddha , Lao Tzu , and all the other Divine Beings did not start or belong to Religions , so you are in GREAT company!

I will not tell you it will bee easy , those are the words of liars and fools. But I will tell you it is "doable" if you so choose to make your own WAY back. The keys are simple and mostly missed and/or ignored by most , even within the Religious systems. FOLLOW your HEART! This is the FIRST KEY! INSIDE YOUR OWN CONSCIOUSNESS is the WAY home, and all the GUIDANCE, WISDOM, TRUTH and LOVE you will ever truly need! Your goal is to make PERSONAL DIVINE COMMUNION , then IT will guide you the rest of the way.

Some useful tools YOU can decide if you want to use or not:

Autobiography of a Yogi by Paramahansa Yogananda
A Course In Miracles
The Power Of Now by Eckhart Tolle
The Book of Alchemy by Francis Melville

These were written by those Souls who were once in the same place you now find yourself and it is beneficial to deeply KNOW you are not alone in this.
Reading them is not enough but it SHINES LIGHT on the inner way home.

[John32241]

Originally Posted by Enchanted_DreamFaerie

Why am I constantly feeling like a horrible person. Will I forever be doomed and lost forever?

Hi,

Actually the way we choose to think about something will influence the way we feel about that subject.

For example, it would be nice if those around me could see the quality of my reflections. Since they can not it becomes most necessary that I do not lose my appreciation for them.

Thoughts like that will elevate the tone of your feelings. Your heart knows that you are not lost but the logical brain needs your encouragements.

John

Faerie, I do not know if this will ease your mind.
Firstly, we do not know right or wrong
Secondly, the path You chose is Your path
Lastly, there is no good or bad, there is only energy and life

Follow your heart. If you wish to help people and they know it, many will consider you a good person. I do =D

Side Note: Regardless if you are religious are not, there is negative energy in the universe and clings to those who are unsure, or have much knowledge.
In my opinion: Be SURE of what you know. In the sense, you KNOW what is negative and you are SURE that you want no part of it. Also remember not to be negative when sending energy away. we've all heard stories of spirits becoming more violent when they are "forced to leave." Make SURE that it will get nothing from you. I have always said,(not to any particular entity, but to the energy) "I do not want your energy and you cannot take mine," and remember not to reassure yourself of this, you KNOW that this energy is malevolent. If the entity realizes you are sure of what you want, it may leave..sometimes for good, sometimes not, or just hide and try again.
I too have trauma as a child. the severity means little. what matters about them is that the negative energy is a part of you. In other words this energy is you. Not allowing the energy to control you, and wanting to change the energy is a good thing to be sure of


I apologize for the novel of a message, and if you do not agree with what I say, I do not blame you. Thank you for posting. =D

Best of wishes to you and your loved ones <3

[Miss Hepburn]

Originally Posted by That oneGuy

Side Note: Regardless if you are religious are not, there is negative energy
in the universe and clings to those who are unsure, or have much knowledge.
I too have trauma as a child... negative energy is a part of you.
In other words this energy is you.

Hi That oneGuy...
Would you expound on this a bit more. (The bolded part?)
You know, like what makes you say this...
Not sure at this point of reading this... I would agree.
Thanks and welcome here.

Originally Posted by Enchanted_DreamFaerie

I'm not sure what to believe in anymore, I thought I knew what to follow but now I don't follow any religion; I just follow what inside my heart and what I feel is right. Am I a bad person. There's some things that happened to me when I was younger and it traumatized me, ever since than I've always felt like a lost soul and not sure what to follow or what to believe in. I love crystals and I mediate whenever I feel stressed out but when it comes to religion I don't follow anything. There's times where I feel lost and other times I tell myself that there's nothing wrong with what I'm doing and why do I always need someone to tell me that I'm not a bad person but deep down I feel like I'm a bad person. I suffer from low self esteem and depression and that's what turned me into spirituality, but my step father tells me I'm worshiping the devil every time he see's me playing with my Tarot & Oracle Cards.... and again I feel like I'm such a bad person. Why am I constantly feeling like a horrible person. Will I forever be doomed and lost forever?

Maybe your conscience is telling you something?! What we feel to be right may not be so. Don't feel lost, I am here. Just kidding.... Since conscience can be moved or influenced by three different spirits:
1. Good spirits: God and angels
2. Bad spirits: demons
3. your own
4. Good and bad spirits can move conscience of people around you to either give you wise counsel and warn you of the dangers you are into (good spirit) or to attack and torment you or to induce you to sin (evil spirits). Bible Verses about Wise Counsel http://www.openbible.info/topics/wise_counsel
So examine you conscience and observe the counsel and actions of people around you. See what spirit moves you and other, see what are you doing wrong. Make changes and move on.

.

Originally Posted by Enchanted_DreamFaerie

I'm not sure what to believe in anymore, I thought I knew what to follow but now I don't follow any religion; I just follow what inside my heart and what I feel is right. Am I a bad person. There's some things that happened to me when I was younger and it traumatized me, ever since than I've always felt like a lost soul and not sure what to follow or what to believe in. I love crystals and I mediate whenever I feel stressed out but when it comes to religion I don't follow anything. There's times where I feel lost and other times I tell myself that there's nothing wrong with what I'm doing and why do I always need someone to tell me that I'm not a bad person but deep down I feel like I'm a bad person. I suffer from low self esteem and depression and that's what turned me into spirituality, but my step father tells me I'm worshiping the devil every time he see's me playing with my Tarot & Oracle Cards.... and again I feel like I'm such a bad person. Why am I constantly feeling like a horrible person. Will I forever be doomed and lost forever?

I used to feel this way too, but I used positive affirmations to change my feelings about myself. If you want to know how I did it let me know.

It is okay if you can't follow any one religion.

RELIGION IS MANS MANIPULATION OF GREATER TEACHINGS. RELIGION IS A BUSINESS CREATED TO INSTILL FEAR AND SUBMISSION. THIS IS WHY OFTEN YOU HEAR PEOPLE CONSIDER THEIR BELIEFS A RELATIONSHIP.

YOU CAN HAVE A RELATIONSHIP WITH "GOD" OR HIGHER UNDERSTANDINGS, AND HIGHER POWERS WITHOUT CALLING IT A RELIGION.

RELIGIONS WERE CREATED TO DIVIDE A PEOPLE UNITED. UPON DEEP STUDY IT BECOMES CLEAR TO SEE THAT AT THE CORE WHEN THESE "DIFFERENT RELIGIONS" CAME TO BE THEY PREACHED THE SAME THING. BUT THEY PREACHED THESE TRUTHS TO A WORLD OF WHICH MEN RULED. MEN WHO FEARED LOSING THEIR POWER BECAUSE AN ENLIGHTENED PEOPLE WOULD NOT NEED THEM.

DEAR FRIEND NEVER FEEL LIKE A TERRIBLE PERSON BECAUSE YOU ARE QUESTIONING THINGS. THIS IS THE GREATEST ABILITY THAT WE HAVE. YOU ARE ON A BEAUTIFUL PATH EVEN THOUGH IT MAY NOT SEEM LIKE IT NOW.

MANY YOUTH ARE RAISED ON THEIR GUARDIANS BELIEFS AND BROUGHT UP WITHOUT QUESTIONING THE TRUTHS OF THEM. BUT IT IS A WONDERFUL GIFT THAT WE HAVE TO BE ABLE TO MAKE THIS DECISION FOR OURSELVES AS WE GROW, AND OUR EXPERIENCES SHAPE OUR INDIVIDUALITY.

YOU ARE ON ONE OF THE GREATEST HUNTS OF MANKIND DEAR FRIEND. REJOICE IN IT. AND FEED YOUR MIND BY TRYING TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS THAT ARE BRINGING YOU DOWN. HAVING A MISSION IS ONE OF THE GREATEST WAYS TO BRING THE SPIRITS UP.

I AM ALWAYS HERE IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO TALK MORE. I HAVE MUCH TO SHARE WITH YOU IF YOU ARE INTERESTED.

[DesertRose]

Originally Posted by Enchanted_DreamFaerie

I'm not sure what to believe in anymore, I thought I knew what to follow but now I don't follow any religion; I just follow what inside my heart and what I feel is right. Am I a bad person. There's some things that happened to me when I was younger and it traumatized me, ever since than I've always felt like a lost soul and not sure what to follow or what to believe in. I love crystals and I mediate whenever I feel stressed out but when it comes to religion I don't follow anything. There's times where I feel lost and other times I tell myself that there's nothing wrong with what I'm doing and why do I always need someone to tell me that I'm not a bad person but deep down I feel like I'm a bad person. I suffer from low self esteem and depression and that's what turned me into spirituality, but my step father tells me I'm worshiping the devil every time he see's me playing with my Tarot & Oracle Cards.... and again I feel like I'm such a bad person. Why am I constantly feeling like a horrible person. Will I forever be doomed and lost forever?

You are not a bad person, you are a beautiful soul and you walk your own path. Be proud of that! Just do what feels right for you..

[NightingalesFlame]

Enchanted
I have felt that way before. Don't be poisoned by other people's beliefs and opinions. God gave us the power of free will. We can choose to believe in Him or not choose. Not all religion is a religion. It's what your heart feels and believes to be true. Joyce Meyer once said "Jesus didn't come so we could have a religion". Religion is like having a belief that's been candy coated. It's about what YOU feel is in it for you. Just because you don't believe in anything doesn't make you a bad person. But one thing I do know is at least believe in yourself. Don't feel lost because you are being judged and condemned. It's not a good thing to feel lost but if you're feeling lost, see it as a way of learning about yourself, just getting to know yourself and finding your way. It's about knowing who YOU are as a person and not about playing with Tarot cards. Knowing yourself is part of inner fulfillment but inner growth.