Self love ideas

[jazzy911]

Does anyone have any idea how to start self love?

The members of my soul family don't want me - I don't mean that to sound negative, it's just a fact. So I would like to practice self love instead!

I am working through many years of emotional abuse so I guess that's a starting point, but what's next?

Thank you and enjoy your evening.

[MissCreativeSpirit]

Do things that nuryure you and make you happy.They can be hobbies or other activities like getting a facial.

[WildHairedWoman]

There is one thing I found helpful and it relates to anger, as that is a reason we don't love ourselves, we are angry and it gets in the way of interacting with others, making us feel unloveable.

Anger is a normal reaction to circumstances. But most anger is rooted in something that happened a long time ago that was not resolved. They way you can tell if your anger is old is that it lasts more than a few minutes.

An example, someone cuts you off in traffic and it ruins your whole day. It keeps you awake thinking about it and you can't let go of the anger. That indicates you are not really angry about being cut off in traffic, that happens usually the perpetrator did it unknowingly. It is not something that should ruin your whole day. For a moment you were frightened that you would hit someone or they would hit you. Then you get angry because someone wasn't paying attention. It was not personal so the anger should dissipate as you continue with your day. That is normal anger.

So when you find yourself in a situation where a normal anger became the ruin of your day you know it is based on old unresolved anger. So, now it is time to track that, what is the first thought when you feel the anger? When is the first time you thought that thought? What was going on, who did you think slighted you or hurt you? It is a long road with lots of self examination to get to the point where you are comfortable enough with your anger to speak up or do what needs to be done to change a situation in the moment that you become angry, and then you can see the normal anger lasting a few minutes instead of the whole day.

[jazzy911]

Thank you both...the anger part really resonates with me too. I will try and reflect on this advice when I need to. xo

[Kaere]

Actions of self-love can really change a person's perspective about themselves. Good for you for realizing this and working towards it.

I agree about doing something nurturing for yourself and also about understanding your anger or other emotions that might be causing some destructive behaviours.

One thing I have done to kick-start some self-love is... well, I allowed myself to spend money on myself. Just on me, not on my kids or for any practical reason. I spent money on a pair of shoes that I really liked but struggled with justifying. I also took time for myself, I scheduled two hours into my day and did exactly what I wanted... just me, no one else. I read a favourite book and had a snack I was craving, no interruptions and no sharing, and I let myself not feel guilty about it. Some may laugh at that, but it was huge for me to let myself enjoy something just for me.

It's about investing in yourself, treating yourself the way you deserve and to feel it's true right in your middle.

Abuse is a difficult thing to move past and I wish you much luck and I'm sending you big thumbs up as this thread you've created feels like such a big step.

Give yourself some time and do these things for yourself... be kind to yourself the way you'd be kind to a child. You will find, over time, as you learn these lessons and what you deserve, that you will draw a new soul group to you. A group more inline with your own heart and understanding. Our soul groups are not static, they are ever changing as our growth takes place. I feel like your first group you feel connected with is propelling you beyond your comfort zone, to learn this lesson. Know that you are on the right track and you are not alone. You have many souls around you behind the scenes encouraging you and celebrating as you move forward in your learning.

[Lynn]

Hello

View on Self Love

It is our human nature to search for that profound love in "the other person” but it is our Soul that leads us to that person we can trust the most. That person is our Mirror Soul (Mirror of Love) that one that holds our very trust and that reflects our own love back to us in a sacred Light.

It is at times easier to see our own loving nature as it is reflected in the eyes of the loved one that stands before us, someone we love, respect and admire, in that we can identify our own ability to love. We can see it most clearly when we are left to our own devices. As spiritual beings we all have a notion and an intellectual understanding of Divine Love, yet we still search for it with our hearts and souls. It is perhaps that search is the very reason we are on this Earth Plane of existence.

We seek to find and then try to define love in all of our relationships, but some relationships offer more intensity than others. In a romantic love connection, two people are brought together by the deeper emotions of who they are while traveling through their journey of love for the other.

It can be said self-love is the foundation for lasting love, for some of us; it is first awakened by the person - that one who sees it in us, even when we do not. That person love’s us for what they see in us. Relationships become the sacred vessel for that love, a vehicle for cultivating that energy; it is a chance for people to evolve as individuals and then as a unit.

It is interesting that, we spend most of our adult lives in love's pursuit! We begin that journey toward romantic love - with the search for the “Mirror Soul” we are really maybe searching for ourselves. In the act of searching for ourselves, we are maybe seeking to know that Devine Light being in “All” there is. What we seek “Out There” we have to know is already “In Here”. That connection to the Devine is through our connection to our Soul and Higher Self.


We are born individual yet from almost day one we are programmed to find that someone to be with. Yet we are born as an individual being. I remember being given an exercise in Guidance Class in High School where we had to look in the mirror and say "I am me and I am OK" I am me and I love me". It was not that easy to do honestly at first. We are so conditioned to be loved but not to love whom we are at times.


I too have found that if you loop your Heart Chakra and your Sacral Charka into a Figure 8 and vision the flow of energy that is the Heart Charka in being love and the Sacral Chaka being your sexuality or reproduction center, you can feel the flow of energy being filled internally.

To be with someone I so feel that you have to be complete in the acceptance of whom you are individually then you welcome someone in that compliments that being that is whole in you.

Lynn

There are some beautiful posts in this thread. Thank you to jazzy for your courage in bringing it forward, and to other posters for your kindness and care.

Namaste,

JL

[Wally]

Am I allowed to state the elephant in the room joke here? well I know I would cop it if I started a similar thread

[Wally]

If you can forgive and forget what others do, then logically you can do the same for yourself. Self acceptance and acceptance of others is interconnected. Once you achieve one, the other usually follows.