Should I ask him why he was holding back on his answers, on our first date?

[olhosdeamendoa]

Originally Posted by OEN34

And if there's no depthness there - yes, even from the off - then I also side you. Small talk has it's place, but it drains the soul out of me. Again, your expectations are fine in this IMO as you're either in alignment with someone, or you're not - it's that simple really. You want to attract someone who's an open book, is deep and doesn't shy away from discussion, and there's nothing wrong with that. You'd become irritable and resentful if you were in someone's company who is shut down, I'm the exact same. There's nothing wrong with being shut down and not an open book, but it isn't for people like you and I. More importantly, I couldn't give my time to someone who had no depthness to them, I'd be forced to stay clear, seriously.

Exactly. I want depthness and to know someone beyond small talk, especially when considering them for a relationship.

Ok you like this type of music, that tv show, you do this and that at the gym, but then what? Is that all you've got?

Actually at one point we were talking about being shy and he asked me if used to be shy and I said yes in the past. And he said being shy is normal. And I said that I used to think that too, but then later realised that being shy is just fear of showing yourself. And he asked if I am still shy, I said not anymore. And... he changed subject.

I mean, I was trying to get deeper into the conversation, and he could have asked me things like "so why were you affraid of showing yourself", or "how did you change", or even talk about himself. So many things he could have talked and asked, but basically he changed subject into if I like football or something like that. I felt frustrated really.

There was also another thing about him: last week he asked me what do I want to do for the second date, I said let's go for a walk in a park. He said ok, and then later on suggested going to a pub he found on Google... no mention at any time of the walk on a park. So why did he ask me what I wanted to do if he completely ignored it?

Anyway, I don't need more dates with this guy. Letting him go is the best thing, so he can find someone else, and same for me.