"Clouds of color" and a fuzzy little something

I’ve lurked a bit on this forum. This is my first post. I’ve searched for anything relating to the subject of this post, but I don’t really know what to search for, or what keyword(s) to use.

For some years, when as deep as I can get in meditation, in the visual field, in front of the eyes, behind the eyelids, the dark gray field seems to move. What I think of as “clouds of color” begin slowly moving, floating “toward me.” Not bright color, dark masses, with just enough difference in color or hue, enough difference that movement is apparent. What it might be like to go through clouds on a dark moonless night – hardly anything is seen, but there is a sense of movement.

When I remain as thought-free as possible, after a while, the “clouds of color” become dark grape-purple and chartreuse, but quite dark, slowly moving around and through each other.

Sometimes, when I am very deep, something small sort of slowly 'looms' into the visual field, on the background of the moving “clouds of color.” When this first happened, years ago, interest and surprise caused a sudden peering at whatever-it-is, and it would quickly disappear. It kind of "blinked out," as if it didn't want to be looked at.

This does not occur with every sitting, just sometimes. The deeper the session, the more likely the appearance, it seems.

The little “ball” is blueish-gray, sometimes purplish-gray, somewhat circular, orb-like and kind of undulating, with lines, or something, in the center - all this is fuzzy, vague, not crispy-clear. I cannot "will" it to stay - the longer I am aware of it peripherally, sort of “not noticing” it, the longer it remains. As long as I don't come down into thought about it, it floats in the field of vision and, after a while, just slowly disappears.

I've learned not to look at it, to just be aware that it is there, and it seems to hover and slowly pulse, on the background of “clouds of color.” I don't know the words to "explain" these phenomena very well. Sorry.

The little bluish-gray ball, not perfectly round, seems to be looking at me - that's always the feeling, like it is checking me out. I feel observed.

There have always been little teeny points of dull light that come into "view" and then quickly fade, when noticed. The blueish-gray "ball" is bigger than the little points, but not very big.

I have no inner visual acuity, at all, like in “visualization,” so, for me, this experience is very unusual. I am one of those people who “can’t visualize.” I don't see stuff, internally. I do feel stuff.

This whole experience is very subtle, it isn’t at all dramatic, although, in print it looks a little dramatic. It isn’t.

Maybe the brain is just bored and projects something visually entertaining because thoughts have slowed way down, then stopped, and there’s nothing for the brain/mind to do. I do know that what I think of as “me” isn’t doing it.

It has become a measure of meditation depth: “Well, at least I got that deep.” But I don’t seem to be able to get any deeper, yet. This seems like a meditation “wall” that I can’t get through or beyond.

Thanks, in advance, for any insight into what this experience is, or might be.

[Xan]

trasheik.... There are many dimensions of consciousness and energy which we may encounter in meditation. Some with shapes and colors and some apparently blank.

In meditation the best approach is simply to be present with whatever is showing up without trying to figure out meanings, or if it's your mind or not. Just remain quiet as the observer of it all.


Xan

Thanks very much, Xan.

Originally Posted by trasheik

I’ve lurked a bit on this forum. This is my first post. I’ve searched for anything relating to the subject of this post, but I don’t really know what to search for, or what keyword(s) to use.

For some years, when as deep as I can get in meditation, in the visual field, in front of the eyes, behind the eyelids, the dark gray field seems to move. What I think of as “clouds of color” begin slowly moving, floating “toward me.” Not bright color, dark masses, with just enough difference in color or hue, enough difference that movement is apparent. What it might be like to go through clouds on a dark moonless night – hardly anything is seen, but there is a sense of movement.

When I remain as thought-free as possible, after a while, the “clouds of color” become dark grape-purple and chartreuse, but quite dark, slowly moving around and through each other.

Sometimes, when I am very deep, something small sort of slowly 'looms' into the visual field, on the background of the moving “clouds of color.” When this first happened, years ago, interest and surprise caused a sudden peering at whatever-it-is, and it would quickly disappear. It kind of "blinked out," as if it didn't want to be looked at.

This does not occur with every sitting, just sometimes. The deeper the session, the more likely the appearance, it seems.

The little “ball” is blueish-gray, sometimes purplish-gray, somewhat circular, orb-like and kind of undulating, with lines, or something, in the center - all this is fuzzy, vague, not crispy-clear. I cannot "will" it to stay - the longer I am aware of it peripherally, sort of “not noticing” it, the longer it remains. As long as I don't come down into thought about it, it floats in the field of vision and, after a while, just slowly disappears.

I've learned not to look at it, to just be aware that it is there, and it seems to hover and slowly pulse, on the background of “clouds of color.” I don't know the words to "explain" these phenomena very well. Sorry.

The little bluish-gray ball, not perfectly round, seems to be looking at me - that's always the feeling, like it is checking me out. I feel observed.

There have always been little teeny points of dull light that come into "view" and then quickly fade, when noticed. The blueish-gray "ball" is bigger than the little points, but not very big.

I have no inner visual acuity, at all, like in “visualization,” so, for me, this experience is very unusual. I am one of those people who “can’t visualize.” I don't see stuff, internally. I do feel stuff.

This whole experience is very subtle, it isn’t at all dramatic, although, in print it looks a little dramatic. It isn’t.

Maybe the brain is just bored and projects something visually entertaining because thoughts have slowed way down, then stopped, and there’s nothing for the brain/mind to do. I do know that what I think of as “me” isn’t doing it.

It has become a measure of meditation depth: “Well, at least I got that deep.” But I don’t seem to be able to get any deeper, yet. This seems like a meditation “wall” that I can’t get through or beyond.

Thanks, in advance, for any insight into what this experience is, or might be.

What an exciting and emotionally stimulating state this can become! Seeing colors, especially when they are rich and sharp in shade with movement that is truely mesmorising to follow, is one of the ultimate states of meditation to experience in my veiw!
How fortunate we can be to have this gift of distraction from our thoughts. It like a personal fireworks show that is stern in its direction and intention to entertain your minds eye and yet keep you trained to trust in the magic of this beautiful flow of energy we seek in meditation.
When the colors begin to flow is when i am suddenly assured that I am in an ultimate 'state', that is far from the average moment in my day. It is indeed a measure of intensity of the meditative state, I completely agree and encourage all to use this as a measure of the depth of your experience in meditation. If that is as far as the session takes you then thats perfectly ok. The sense of escape from our conscious state is a unique gift to ourselves.
If you can experience the color show without a smile in your soul then you may be underestiating the very power that it is able to instill in your soul. The entire purpose of our meditation is to invigorate and enlighten your inner self and what a cool way to do it. Colors create emotional experieces and movement signifies progress does it not. So bring it on and enjoy the show while you gently and silently grow and dance with the colors before you. How sweet are the simple pleasures.

Originally Posted by angellove

What an exciting and emotionally stimulating state this can become! Seeing colors, especially when they are rich and sharp in shade with movement that is truely mesmorising to follow, is one of the ultimate states of meditation to experience in my veiw!
How fortunate we can be to have this gift of distraction from our thoughts. It like a personal fireworks show that is stern in its direction and intention to entertain your minds eye and yet keep you trained to trust in the magic of this beautiful flow of energy we seek in meditation.
When the colors begin to flow is when i am suddenly assured that I am in an ultimate 'state', that is far from the average moment in my day. It is indeed a measure of intensity of the meditative state, I completely agree and encourage all to use this as a measure of the depth of your experience in meditation. If that is as far as the session takes you then thats perfectly ok. The sense of escape from our conscious state is a unique gift to ourselves.
If you can experience the color show without a smile in your soul then you may be underestiating the very power that it is able to instill in your soul. The entire purpose of our meditation is to invigorate and enlighten your inner self and what a cool way to do it. Colors create emotional experieces and movement signifies progress does it not. So bring it on and enjoy the show while you gently and silently grow and dance with the colors before you. How sweet are the simple pleasures.

Perfect response!, all you need to know is that you are on the right path, do not judge, you are an observer, nothing more than what you witness at the time you meditate will unfold untill you are ready, as you progress (through constant meditation) so more will unfold. Its a journey, from my own experience, whilst you have the chance and the time, make the committment NOW, there is nothing in this life that will prepare you for the next life, more telling than the mind voyage you have currentltly undertaken.

Originally Posted by trasheik

The little “ball” is blueish-gray, sometimes purplish-gray, somewhat circular, orb-like and kind of undulating, with lines, or something, in the center - all this is fuzzy, vague, not crispy-clear. I cannot "will" it to stay - the longer I am aware of it peripherally, sort of “not noticing” it, the longer it remains. As long as I don't come down into thought about it, it floats in the field of vision and, after a while, just slowly disappears.

I've learned not to look at it, to just be aware that it is there, and it seems to hover and slowly pulse, on the background of “clouds of color.” I don't know the words to "explain" these phenomena very well. Sorry.

Assuming this is the same as my experience, your description is actually very good. My experience is very similar to what you describe; I’d become aware of the little ball and if I attempted to observe it directly it would move slowly off. It does it on occasion now and then though I now know that as it moves off it is not the little ball that is moving it is my “consciousness” (not awareness) doing this and it stops moving.

Hope this helps

I experience the same, and the more I think about or try and focus on the shapes/symbols the more elusive they seem to become.

Maybe the key is to simply try and do nothing, that was a great analogy fm55.

This seems kewl, Why not try exerciseing it a bit more. The gansfeld effect might help with a certain strain of visaliztion, My best bet would be to try taking advantage of how your brain percives images, for instance if u closed your eyes or went to sleep with the ligth on outside your door, and someone turned it off without you noticeing, you have a good chance of still seeing the light thur your eye lids. This can be hard to fine tune to work, but what it dose is gives u a better time to practice seeing something that will go away if you paid to much attension to it. Not to mention often time a persons own excitment can Bring them away from an experance, so this may be a better way of dealing with thatb sligth but immensse feeling.