do i have to remember how I died to close the door?

I have experience being a female from long ago who i think i found through much search, old newspapers and official records. I can't get from a to b with her and only to the final scene when she is already dead. I often have dreams and so on from what seem to be bits and pieces of her life. Usually just a home wife life, working at home, sitting in church. I wish to close the door but can't. Any help would be greatly appreciated. She left home in midday and was then found days later, dead, injury in the back of the head, and not known if it came before or after death in water.

Hi asearcher..... Do you want to close the door on this? I only ask because does this not show you things you are meant to know ( even if not pleasant). Sometimes I feel we need to be shown things in order to progress. Clearing karma etc. I recently had an experience of realisation that was too terrible for me to comprehend , which connected a prior life to my own. Even now, because it is all very recent I can't get my head around it , and yet logically it explains so much to me.

Originally Posted by Elfin

Hi asearcher..... Do you want to close the door on this? I only ask because does this not show you things you are meant to know ( even if not pleasant). Sometimes I feel we need to be shown things in order to progress. Clearing karma etc. I recently had an experience of realisation that was too terrible for me to comprehend , which connected a prior life to my own. Even now, because it is all very recent I can't get my head around it , and yet logically it explains so much to me.

Hi Elfin! thank you for writing to me. This life was not triggered by me re visiting these places (as how it was with the other past life I remember) and I have not been around those old times stuff or been seeing a movie from that time in age. But the dreams still come and I don't know what it is that I am suppose to understand. I'm afraid she is gonna take over just like the other past life me took over, and this take energy from me. Energy I need in this life, this current life and in this case I don't know what good it will do. I fear she died like this: She was hit in the back of her head by someone or something and then came into the water or she got hit by something while in the water and drown because of it. Then I remember being her ghost and to be honest she feels off. She becomes happy when she sees her widower come to her coffin and kiss her dead cheek for Christ sake as if she thinks he is not saying goodbye, oh no, he is saying hello. Just pure joy. Oh, there he is! Perhaps a part of her knows she is dead but as this is too traumatic for her or she does not remember what happened she prefers to think she is still alive? Well, I guess in a way she was. So I am afraid she will just replay memories to me because that part of me does not have the final chapter, doesn't get how she died, and I can't get too it because either it is too traumatic or because the injury to the head wiped me out so then I can't remember. Her desire to be a house wife is so strong, I can feel how much she wants to go home, she wants her home, she wants her family. I'm also dealing with someone who got real blue at the late part of her life, worried about her safety (and her fear became true I guess...). It was as if her doctor just thought she was irrational and her death was only seen as suicide because she could not handle the fear anymore. I think she got by accident involve with a criminal she wanted nothing to do with but who had a tied, unfinished business with her husband who too had a criminal past says records, but when married to her he walk the line, had steady job and I don't even know if she knew about his rocky past.

So you see I don't want "her" to pull me too much "back in" there with no finish story, without "her" being aware of how she died.

I'm sorry I don't even know if any of this make any sense to you or anyone. ... hope it is alright?

Thank you so much for wanting to help :)
I hope you get to get over your own shock with what you now remembered.

Originally Posted by asearcher

Hi Elfin! thank you for writing to me. This life was not triggered by me re visiting these places (as how it was with the other past life I remember) and I have not been around those old times stuff or been seeing a movie from that time in age. But the dreams still come and I don't know what it is that I am suppose to understand. I'm afraid she is gonna take over just like the other past life me took over, and this take energy from me. Energy I need in this life, this current life and in this case I don't know what good it will do. I fear she died like this: She was hit in the back of her head by someone or something and then came into the water or she got hit by something while in the water and drown because of it. Then I remember being her ghost and to be honest she feels off. She becomes happy when she sees her widower come to her coffin and kiss her dead cheek for Christ sake as if she thinks he is not saying goodbye, oh no, he is saying hello. Just pure joy. Oh, there he is! Perhaps a part of her knows she is dead but as this is too traumatic for her or she does not remember what happened she prefers to think she is still alive? Well, I guess in a way she was. So I am afraid she will just replay memories to me because that part of me does not have the final chapter, doesn't get how she died, and I can't get too it because either it is too traumatic or because the injury to the head wiped me out so then I can't remember. Her desire to be a house wife is so strong, I can feel how much she wants to go home, she wants her home, she wants her family. I'm also dealing with someone who got real blue at the late part of her life, worried about her safety (and her fear became true I guess...). It was as if her doctor just thought she was irrational and her death was only seen as suicide because she could not handle the fear anymore. I think she got by accident involve with a criminal she wanted nothing to do with but who had a tied, unfinished business with her husband who too had a criminal past says records, but when married to her he walk the line, had steady job and I don't even know if she knew about his rocky past.

So you see I don't want "her" to pull me too much "back in" there with no finish story, without "her" being aware of how she died.

I'm sorry I don't even know if any of this make any sense to you or anyone. ... hope it is alright?

Thank you so much for wanting to help :)
I hope you get to get over your own shock with what you now remembered.

Hi and please don't apologise. Sometimes it is hard to explain things in a message. I feel for you if this appears to be taking over your life and emotions. And it does sound very traumatic, and the detail is very graphic. You remind me very much of a lovely young man on the forum called "ThatMan". I don't know whether you have read any of his posts but he has visions and experience too that are very graphic and if a sensitive nature. Maybe he might be able to help you a little more than I can, and he's lovely, so don't be shy to read his posts and talk with him. I do think that you are very gifted and are being shown all of these things for a reason. But that fact alone does not always give peace of mind does it? And thank you, I am still trying to work out whether my own sudden realisation is all in my head , or whether it's true! Life's never simple is it. I don't think I've been much help really, but still here to listen, to read, to offer verbal support if nothing else!

[Native spirit]

Sometimes we are shown things from the past.to enable us to grow it may not always be pleasant.
Have you thought of seeing a past life therapist. this could give you the answers you seek, better than we can.


Namaste

Originally Posted by Native spirit

Sometimes we are shown things from the past.to enable us to grow it may not always be pleasant.
Have you thought of seeing a past life therapist. this could give you the answers you seek, better than we can.


Namaste

Hi Native Spirit. In fact I would go as far as to say we "have " to go through these unpleasant times. We cannot continue forth in our journey until we have seen, witnessed and released karma. We need to let go of any baggage . I have had a realisation, as I mentioned which I believe connects a past life to a present one and it is to do with my father, and although the concept is quite disturbing, it does answer so many questions, and makes sense of my current life. I suppose the only way for me to know for sure would be to go down the path of regression. But I have always been a little afraid of doing this, as I have heard it can be dangerous and can only be done by an absolute professional that knows exactly what they are doing. Otherwise I would love to know, not just about this, but about other lives as I have been shown so many things.

Originally Posted by Elfin

Hi and please don't apologise. Sometimes it is hard to explain things in a message. I feel for you if this appears to be taking over your life and emotions. And it does sound very traumatic, and the detail is very graphic. You remind me very much of a lovely young man on the forum called "ThatMan". I don't know whether you have read any of his posts but he has visions and experience too that are very graphic and if a sensitive nature. Maybe he might be able to help you a little more than I can, and he's lovely, so don't be shy to read his posts and talk with him. I do think that you are very gifted and are being shown all of these things for a reason. But that fact alone does not always give peace of mind does it? And thank you, I am still trying to work out whether my own sudden realisation is all in my head , or whether it's true! Life's never simple is it. I don't think I've been much help really, but still here to listen, to read, to offer verbal support if nothing else!

Hi Elfin and thank you :) (although i think i am more weird than gifted, ha ha) I have gotten a good impression of "ThatMan" too.

In my other past life I was triggered by returning to where my past life lived and even one time on vacation in Spain I was getting all funny again and remembering having been there, remembering a past life ex boyfriend who had lived in a red house with some of his friends. I knew roads and so forth. Up to that point I had only short 3 second based flashbacks of him, one when he was really young and waiting by a fountain with his friends and she was young then too. Now I had flashbacks of what it looked inside the house, the back garden too and being there during summer time with him and some friends, it had several bedrooms on the second floor. He looked older than he had than before. I knew my way from the house down to a beach. This was a tourist place and at first I could not understand it because my first feeling was really "but oh I've been here before" but then thinking about it knowing that no , I had not been there during this life time, and then it started - the flashbacks, the dreams, the just "knowing". The red house was like you know when you know you have put a box a chocolate away in one of the kitchen cabinets for later. You still know it's there. Even if your eyes are not there, you can feel it, pulling you. That is how it sometimes works for me. Long time later I was astonished to find that that red house use to be his, his summer house. He had written a book of his spiritual memoirs in a different language and my past life self was in it, took me a great while in order to get this limited (very limited) edition,in it he mention his love for his summer home there in Spain. There was nothing about this house that indicated to anyone in the present that he use to live there. So while i was there on vacation I was like 80% in the other world and I couldn't control it, just like it had been when I revisited where she use to live some years before. The other 20% was the present me and what the love of my life got while we were there, he would say "Are you sick or something?", "You're somewhere else" "What's the matter with you?", so he could tell. I was loosing energy too. It was only when I got home I got to step back in my own shoes. Both trips were thought of and ordered by others beside myself so it was not like I first remembered I had lived there in my past life and then scheduled the trips. These days or years really when thinking back I no longer have re play memories from that life like it was back then. so it has all settled. (I'm sorry for perhaps giving a confusing image of this past life self's love life...if I could please explain she had a childhood friend, male (the one with the summer house in Spain) but during the adult years they parted and then met again after her divorce and reconnected, this time a romance blossomed. She was married when young to someone who was a family man, who really appreciated that life and he wanted to keep a strong parenting role after their divorce, a divorce that seem to have gone on for a long time. this was a long term relationship, the longest. Her relationship with the childhood friend who had the house in Spain failed although the impression I got was that it was a loving and safe relationship, and later on she met the man who would be cruel and mark her for life. She did not remarry. The ex husband and family would still see her as family and a friend and on facebook etc I have seen the family put up photos of them and on some they were still married but on others they're divorced but still doing family stuff together. One is even when she is expecting the cruel man's baby and is photographed with a child from her previous marriage)

I guess I don't want that to happen again and I don't get what is triggering it as I am far from the place where this other past life lived and died. I've never been there during this life time.

I could tell my past life self who had the injury had been happy and most likely thought to have lived a normal life in a working class neighborhood. From the experiences beside living a normal life I can tell of her suspecting something with her husband and a police officer, either that they knew each other somehow or that one of them, or perhaps both were corrupted in some way, I can't figure it out, not with my 3 seconds clarity in the dreams before it all slips away. Overall The police was busy with all the criminal activity in the area, I have understood when I have gone through so many newspapers by now, so her death was just one of the many the police had to investigate on and I can't say if they wrap it up too soon. The husband remarried after the one year of grief after "My" death to a woman who had lived nearby them, I've found out when doing search on him. Right now I can make a list if someone hit her with something in the back of the head who it was, but it doesn't change anything as I can't remember. The late part she was dealing with what was thought of as irrational fear and seeking treatment for it. She most likely knew there was a real threat towards her or perhaps even other family members too but could maybe not speak about it for real to any doctor.

In the life after that one I ended up being a woman who was beaten now and then by the cruel ex and her death too came unexpected and they had to do an investigation then as well, in her case because she died at home. She had bruises. She too had lived with fear that at times were seen as irrational and became blue and dealt with anxiety show my search. The investigation came up with the result that she had died a natural death even if she was not that old, heart, stomach area. The bruises, violence had not caused it.
So perhaps a lesson I needed to learn for some reason was to live with fear.

In the life with the injury in the back of the head I don't have any indications that her husband was cruel to her, to me it look like a relationship in harmony. The same goes with everyone else in the family. There has not been anything there to tell me her husband did not love her. She's not afraid of him, like afraid he will get violent or something like that with her. Because I have felt that type of fear before in other scenes, other life, I have come to the conclusion that if she was afraid of him like that she, I would have felt it. From what I can see she loved him too. He moved on fast, though...

I will look out for more signs if it comes in dreams, maybe I am missing something in all the normal things I see her doing?

it make sense that there is some left over karma that I somehow have to deal with.

Thank you once again for all the great tip and hearing me out :)

Hi asearcher .. and it is a pleasure to read all of your accounts. I don't mean a pleasure as in you would read a good book, or watch a good film, because that sounds "cold" and "un-caring".. And I am probably one of the most caring souls on the planet!!!!! I feel for everyone and just want to help everyone as much as I can .... But no man is an island!!! Please please please don't let it take over your life. I know it is all encompassing.. but at the same time don't drown in it. Accept that you are very gifted, more gifted that usual. Accept that you are being shown these things for a reason, but dont try to spend all of your hours trying to work it out. Why? Because it will all become apparent in time.

Originally Posted by Elfin

Hi asearcher .. and it is a pleasure to read all of your accounts. I don't mean a pleasure as in you would read a good book, or watch a good film, because that sounds "cold" and "un-caring".. And I am probably one of the most caring souls on the planet!!!!! I feel for everyone and just want to help everyone as much as I can .... But no man is an island!!! Please please please don't let it take over your life. I know it is all encompassing.. but at the same time don't drown in it. Accept that you are very gifted, more gifted that usual. Accept that you are being shown these things for a reason, but dont try to spend all of your hours trying to work it out. Why? Because it will all become apparent in time.

Hi Elfin! Thank you for caring this much! I have a very good impression of you :) You're right, I can't consume in this...on one way it is my old fear again because when all of that happened when i remembered the other life it was chaos for me like it was 2 of me and i had no one to talk to what was happening, for so long i figure i had channeled a ghost but then when putting it all together, especially with a childhood nightmare of how my past life died, I realize that even if i did not want to - that had been me in the past life. Now when Looking back there must have been a reason beyond my understanding at the time why I even got back there.

i notice that i am not bombarded with past life memories like I was in Spain for example. Overall i have now worked on trying not to be frighten, trying to stay positive. The amount I get is much less and I have just decided to let this have it's way. I was afraid before when I made this thread that it would escalate like I have been used to from before, but it hasn't. There is not any ugly memories that come through either, just nice ones.

Could be because someone else in my current life was in that life, but have nightmares about it (isn't fair now is it, while I get all the good ones, ha ha) that we are effecting each other, waking each other up with this unintentionally. When I check the dates it was around this time my past life self got killed so perhaps subconsciously this too has effected me. The person I think was with me in that life seem to have then a relationship in harmony with me as this person has with me in this current life too, so I guess that's good, there is no bad karma between us. I just wish I did not give this person nightmares

Thank you for your words, I will listen

Hi asearcher. You do sound very like me!! I am a deep thinker. I dissect everything , every word, every letter, every full stop until my mind is satisfied there is no more to think about and I have reached a conclusion that I can understand and am happy with!! So really I know how hard it is to "not think too much" as I expressed to you! It's because you have so so much to see and digest all the time. It would be easy for it all to take over your life. I am led to believe that the things you witness do have to be shown to your conscious mind, as unpleasant as it is, in order to continue spiritually. You appear to be developing at a rapid pace. And if course this is only my gut feeling from reading your posts . Someone else may have a different theory. But ultimately it's what you feel and think about it all that matters most. It's not easy sometimes is it?... Best of wishes.