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Go Back   Spiritual Forums > Spirituality & Beliefs > Love & Relationships -Friends and Family

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  #11  
Old 20-02-2020, 05:11 PM
Rachella Rachella is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2018
Posts: 187
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Native spirit
I cant say I had this my parents thought nothing of my achievements never got a well done nothing, where as my siblings were bragged up something rotten.
yet I was the one who got A diploma. but I didn't count. I am the one who has had the hard life.where they have had it easy. I knew my mother didn't like me. but I didn't like her either
where my siblings had everything. but only my friends saw through her and saw how I was treated, what ever I did was never good enough.
but my two sisters in particular were praised all the time.
But out of it I grew up not caring what they thought. I have always followed my own path. I have got good friends my siblings have not they thought my parents were enough for them. now my parents have gone they haven't got the friends I have. so it did them no good in the end



Namaste
Thanks for replying and yes, I hear you. I am happy you got all the love and appreciation you deserve
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  #12  
Old 20-02-2020, 05:23 PM
Rachella Rachella is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2018
Posts: 187
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ewwerrin
Her desire cannot affect you in a wrong way, but it also cannot affect you in a good way (which gives you less conscious awareness of her being and becoming evermore here and now, because you are not allowing the joy of your being that can thus interact with her more consciously), if you do not allow yourself to recognize your own true desire, which then allows you to recognize your mother'r true desire regarding you. Which you don't need her to remind you of your true desire. Which is also your mother'r true desire. So that you can also grow more consciously aware of your own mother'r true nature of being and becoming evermore here and now. By simply allowing yourself to be all that you truely are being and becoming evermore here and now. And then you will know who your mother truely is. Because you cannot be who you truely are, and at the same time be contradicting your own greater allowed realisation of all that is being and becoming evermore here and now. And it doesn't require you to do anything, but allow yourself to be all that you truely are being and becoming evermore here and now, which cannot be done, it can only be allowed. So allow.

So allow your evermore greater allowed realisation of all that you truely are being and becoming evermore here and now. And don't worry about any thought or perspective you may be having in the moment, that may temporarily block your own greater allowed realisation of all that is being and becoming evermore here and now, only temporarily. For as long as you can hold on that resistant perspective, and suffer unnecessarily over it. But you are always free to do so, for as long as you are physically focused. And you are unconditionally loved and supported and guided, regardless of any of this. Nothing can make you less. You can always focus yourself into more self contradictory perspectives. Cause how will you know the joy of remembering who you truely are, if you never choose to forget it? And limit your own ability to remember it? So that you can come to a new perspective and awareness and appreciation of all that you truely are being and becoming evermore here and now, from a new point of view unlike any that has ever been before it or will ever be like it ever again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again.... Being and becoming evermore here and now.

Thus, I say, you have forgotten enough. Really, enough. I'm not joking. There is no point in going further with that. Just let go and allow. Your evermore natural and effortless greater allowed realisation of all that you truely are being and becoming evermore here and now. And then don't care about your mother. She will be there when you finally allow yourself to find yourself. And who you truely are being and becoming evermore here and now. Because she's always been here and now, and you've always been here and now aswell.

So let go of the conditional approach. Because her "dying" is your indication that it is time for you to let go of the conditional approach. And simply allow your unconditionally worthy nature of being and becoming evermore here and now all that you truely are being and becoming evermore here and now, as you allow your own natural and effortless greater allowed realisation, under any and all conditions, regardless of any and all conditions, unconditionally, of all that you truely are being and becoming evermore effortlessly and naturally and joyfully and freely here and now. As you can be do or have anything you so desire. So allow yourself to be who you truely want to be. Because you cannot ever become less than all that you truely are being and becoming evermore here and now.

Unconditional love to you, and all.

Thanks, I really liked this one. In fact I have thought that this situation is a reflection of my own inner resistance. I have always had a conflicted relationship with her, right now it just p****s me off that she lied without worrying about me having to face the consequences. At the moment I am allowing myself to be angry, as I have suppressed this anger for years now. But it's nice to be reminded that I am loved and guided and I truly have myself once I will allow it
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  #13  
Old 01-04-2020, 08:44 PM
Dropship Dropship is offline
Newbie ;)
Join Date: Mar 2020
Posts: 12
 
Topic: If you mother wishes too much for you, can her desires affect you in a neg. way?
-------------------------------------------------------

My old schoolmate Melvin had a pushy mother like that, she made him stay in to study instead of playing football and cricket with us on the green.
After we left school, he became a solicitor and ended up stealing from clients, it was in the local paper.
I blame his mother for messing him up by denying him a normal childhood.
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  #14  
Old 02-04-2020, 02:55 PM
hazada guess
Posts: n/a
 
If you mother wishes too much for you, can her desires affect you in a neg. way?

I think that most mothers what whats best for their children,sometimes putting them on a pedestal.Mine certainly did,(ie..making me go to piano lessons for years,even though I was c**p at it lol,)because my father was a musician before he died.
Whatever I did,I couldn't live up to her expectations, but never the less there was a bond there.Eventually I left home to lead my own life,but came back to care for her in her final years.I believe that was my reason for being here.
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  #15  
Old 02-04-2020, 09:10 PM
Lynn Lynn is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Past Pluto in the vastness of space and time
Posts: 13,918
  Lynn's Avatar
Hello

I can relate to issues with a Mother, I never connected with mine, to the point that I cut all ties to her.

What you can do is take lessons from this and turn it into something positive for you. The feeling around her is that she "never wanted to be a Mother". So in this she tried to live her life the one she wanted to have through you. In doing that she projected herself onto you and into you on some levels.

In making up stories it gave her life a greater meaning and put her in a higher place in her mind. When it comes to what others think of you, do not let that worry you. You being happy in the work your doing is what matters most. In that space of being you, follow your heart and follow the path you want to have for you.

As for not being able to resolve the issues with Mother, you still can. It's called a "Letter to Spirit" this is a letter you write to your Mother putting down how you felt about what happened. Not in a negative way keep it as calm and positive as you can. In it put what you felt growing up an reflect that into now how your feel and what you can take from it in a lesson that can give you personal growth.

What I learned in that connection I never had with my Mother is that I never choose her as a parent, yes she birthed me but my Soul never choose her other than to be the host. I choose my Father and she was well the tool in the tool shed. He passed when I was 25 and planning my wedding.

My Mother worshiped the ground my Brother walked on, and still does, and would always say that she never favored one over the other but she did. Growing up with her was not good but she gave me a lot of lessons in what not to be like in raising my family.

So look to what I there that gave you life, and make your life the one your proud of, not what others want you to be.

As for your Father, yes that I another story, do your best to find peace with this before his passing.

Lynn
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If the crow has chosen you as your spirit or totem animal, it supports you in developing the power of sight, transformation, and connection with life’s magic.
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  #16  
Old 19-04-2020, 01:59 PM
Dropship Dropship is offline
Newbie ;)
Join Date: Mar 2020
Posts: 12
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lynn
My Mother worshiped the ground my Brother walked on, and still does, and would always say that she never favored one over the other but she did..


One of those worst examples of "parental favouritism" is in one of yachtsman Francis Chichester's books; his father doted on his sister, and when as a kid Francis brought an adder home as a "pet" it bit Francis, but far from showing sympathy his father was angry and said "It might have bitten your sister!"
He then told Francis to get on his bike and pedal to the hospital some miles away, and he pulled through.
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  #17  
Old 02-05-2020, 07:48 AM
Rachella Rachella is offline
Knower
Join Date: Jul 2018
Posts: 187
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by hazada guess
If you mother wishes too much for you, can her desires affect you in a neg. way?

I think that most mothers what whats best for their children,sometimes putting them on a pedestal.Mine certainly did,(ie..making me go to piano lessons for years,even though I was c**p at it lol,)because my father was a musician before he died.
Whatever I did,I couldn't live up to her expectations, but never the less there was a bond there.Eventually I left home to lead my own life,but came back to care for her in her final years.I believe that was my reason for being here.
This is beautiful, thank you.
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  #18  
Old 02-05-2020, 07:54 AM
Rachella Rachella is offline
Knower
Join Date: Jul 2018
Posts: 187
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lynn
Hello

I can relate to issues with a Mother, I never connected with mine, to the point that I cut all ties to her.

What you can do is take lessons from this and turn it into something positive for you. The feeling around her is that she "never wanted to be a Mother". So in this she tried to live her life the one she wanted to have through you. In doing that she projected herself onto you and into you on some levels.

In making up stories it gave her life a greater meaning and put her in a higher place in her mind. When it comes to what others think of you, do not let that worry you. You being happy in the work your doing is what matters most. In that space of being you, follow your heart and follow the path you want to have for you.

As for not being able to resolve the issues with Mother, you still can. It's called a "Letter to Spirit" this is a letter you write to your Mother putting down how you felt about what happened. Not in a negative way keep it as calm and positive as you can. In it put what you felt growing up an reflect that into now how your feel and what you can take from it in a lesson that can give you personal growth.

What I learned in that connection I never had with my Mother is that I never choose her as a parent, yes she birthed me but my Soul never choose her other than to be the host. I choose my Father and she was well the tool in the tool shed. He passed when I was 25 and planning my wedding.

My Mother worshiped the ground my Brother walked on, and still does, and would always say that she never favored one over the other but she did. Growing up with her was not good but she gave me a lot of lessons in what not to be like in raising my family.

So look to what I there that gave you life, and make your life the one your proud of, not what others want you to be.

As for your Father, yes that I another story, do your best to find peace with this before his passing.

Lynn
Thanks Lynn, and sorry I did not see your post. That letter is a work in progress
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  #19  
Old 02-05-2020, 07:55 AM
Rachella Rachella is offline
Knower
Join Date: Jul 2018
Posts: 187
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dropship
One of those worst examples of "parental favouritism" is in one of yachtsman Francis Chichester's books; his father doted on his sister, and when as a kid Francis brought an adder home as a "pet" it bit Francis, but far from showing sympathy his father was angry and said "It might have bitten your sister!"
He then told Francis to get on his bike and pedal to the hospital some miles away, and he pulled through.
Oh my God. Luckily it wasn't this bad in my family
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  #20  
Old 02-05-2020, 08:04 AM
Rachella Rachella is offline
Knower
Join Date: Jul 2018
Posts: 187
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dropship
Topic: If you mother wishes too much for you, can her desires affect you in a neg. way?
-------------------------------------------------------

My old schoolmate Melvin had a pushy mother like that, she made him stay in to study instead of playing football and cricket with us on the green.
After we left school, he became a solicitor and ended up stealing from clients, it was in the local paper.
I blame his mother for messing him up by denying him a normal childhood.
Wow. That's a good answer to my original question. I think that parents caring too much or not caring at all may affect their children in the same way. Interesting story. In my life I have met a lot of people like Melvin, lol. I think that those like me and the Melvins are meant to gravitate towards each other to reach a better understanding of their own wounds. Thanks
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