should i reach out?

[Teddy_Broselvet]

once we met, both her world and mine began to crumble.

We were both married with children, with an alarmingly similar history involving our first child. As it would turn out, she was pregnant at the same time as my girlfriend was. Both her child's father and my child's mother both got hooked on drugs and split, now in and out of jail. And i would later find out that my possible TF and daughter's mother had had quite the checkered past when younger. Which has always struck me as strange, because they never lived in the same town. I'm told that my daughter's mother had a history of stealing boyfriends from the possible TF when they were in school. It probably doesn't matter, but prior to knowing this information, I frequently compared the two. I loved my daughter's mom. But she was just TOO much. The possible TF had the same attributes that i loved, but just not as overpowering. To add to the strangeness, possible TF has compared me to her son's father. (similar build, similar attitude, we both love playing guitar, ect)
We are thrown in each other's path, and start talking over Snap Chat. Over the course of the next couple days, we go from unknown on SC to her having a heart next to her name. Were both married, and feeling the connection, then out of the blue, she ghosts me the entire summer. It took me months to get over that couple day connection.
Fast forward to the end of summer, fate would have it that we ran into each other again, and once again, we begin talking again. This time we couldn't stop. This is when i began researching all the weird **** that's been going on and come across the Twin Flame Lists. This stuff freaks me out, and i decide to keep it to myself.
3 weeks pass and she confesses to her husband that she is in love with me and wants a divorce. We continue our relationship for a few more weeks, she pleaded with me to start a life with her, but i couldn't walk out on my children 2 weeks before Christmas. She decided that she couldn't wait for me and ghosted me again. This time, immediately jumping into a relationship with another guy.

she told me once, that when she kissed that other guy, she felt guilty as if she was being disloyal to me. But i'm still married and she's off doing things only god knows what.
ff doing things only god knows what.

we haven't spoke in 5 months. even after going through marriage counseling, i still cant get past this girl. I kind of want to put Snap Chat back on my phone but i don't know if i should. Part of me is afraid to see that she wrote me a message....The other part is afraid she hasn't...

This is unfortunately one of those things you have to work out for yourself. Were it me, I'd put all my effort into moving on. She does seem to be a bit demanding and mind-gaming. How many people is she going to use up before she grows up? Sounds like one of those females for whom marriage was a rite of passage and as the sex grew banal had to find excitement elsewhere. A right little flirt. But that's just my opinion. Men are just as bad if bad is the word!

♥