Surrender and Detachment.

[SierraNevadaStar]

I 'suck' at both of these as I tend to worry and have anxiety issues! I've been struggling to achieve both for a good long time and would love some guidance, advice and suggestions on how to accomplish the twain. Whenever I do manage to do these things (unfortunately, such times are fleeting), I notice how much better I feel and I come to enjoy life far more. I feel at 'one with the flow' and feel 'correct' in my Way overall. This seems like a mountain I have got to climb -- achieving a state of surrender and detachment -- otherwise, I'll get nowhere at all.

Thanks for reading this and for any help you might offer.

Peace and blessings!

[A human Being]

Oh dear, I experienced a lot of anxiety earlier in the year so I feel for you. As far as that goes, I think the most important thing is to withdraw attention from the mind and connect with what you're feeling below the neck. Even just a few slow, deep belly breaths in through the nose and out through the mouth can work wonders in calming you down and preventing those anxious thoughts from spiralling; I've found mindfulness meditation extremely helpful, too, as a way to bring my attention into my present experience and reduce the repetitive, circular thought patterns, though you do have to persevere with it because you likely aren't going to see tangible results straight away.

As far as surrender and detachment more generally are concerned, I do think present-moment awareness is crucially important, so anything that helps to slow your mind down and make you more mindful is good; many people feel the benefits of body-work practices like yoga and tai chi, for example (I practised yoga and found it pretty much indispensible when the anxiety was at its worst, it's a great way of relieving/releasing tension in the body).

Edit: By chance I came across a video on Youtube on the subject of fear that you might also find useful - here, if you're interested (don't worry, it's less than ten minutes long ).

[Hemera]

Hey.

Have you tried meditation? With meditation you can learn to be with difficult feelings despite the discomfort they cause. I would suggest sitting in meditation and watch what comes up. Try to be the observer. Watch everything; anxious feelings, shocking thoughts, feelings about your thoughts, even intense desires to get up and do something else. This is incredibly hard to do, but over time if you perserve it will encourage an atmosphere of acceptance which transfers over to your daily life. This acceptance is the foundation of surrender and detachment. At the end of the day, all thoughts and emotions are just passing through. In meditation you learn to see that.

[Jyotir]

Hi SierraNevadaStar,

We all have the same issues to contend with so no need to compare and judge your effectiveness - even internally.

Anxiety comes from an expectation, followed by disappointment, frustration, regret, guilt, depression accordingly. It's a product of desire-mind..the process of desire mind.

Therefore make an effort to examine, identify, and reduce the play of that process, the unconscious expectation in your 'thought process'. That creates openness which will reduce anxiety, and promote detachment. Like Hemera says in the previous reply, this can also be practiced and experienced in meditation. Then the trick is to carry that over into everyday life experience, which takes time, patience and perseverance.

When you are comfortable with that, or simultaneous to it - try to create a feeling of God-reliance which leads to surrender, because it is surrender.

No expectation, God reliance - - and offering results of actions - surrender - whatever the outcome, to God.

That is a very effective means to achieve a dynamic peace-of-mind.

~ J

[SierraNevadaStar]

Yes, I meditate and I have been doing so routinely for a few years now. I have also practiced 'Violet Flame' decrees for about the same time. I creatively visualize too (which is not oging to do me a lot of good if I don't keep my negative emotions in check!). And it does help...I do yoga and pilates as well and like to take walks/hike. I also look to natural supplements/remedies to help my anxiety issues as well and again, they help.

I've been going through a tough situation for almost about the same amount of time I've been meditating. Things have really hit a rough patch for the past few months and I'm just finding it not as feasible to take a step back from it all and let things be. So, I start worrying, I chase up on matters (compulsively -- I suffered from severe OCD back in my 20s) to see 'how things are doing' and that only seems to make things worse. Before, I was not doing that so much and I certainly felt more removed from it whenever I did. In dreams and via other ways, what I do/have been doing has been referred to as, 'consuming junk food.' And I get that, of course I do. It isn't nourishing to the heart, soul and spirit. It's difficult not to desire those things and yet, I understand the paradox there -- that often when we cease in desiring something, it manifests. I'm not a Buddhist, but more of a Taoist and maybe it is easier for a Buddhist to practice detachment since desire is to be eradicated on that path. I am also a Pagan/witch and desire is 'the spice of life' to many of us and it fuels spells and rituals. I believe feeling desire can be a wonderfully enlivening thing but even with spells and rituals, once you cast them you've got to detach from the outcome.

I am nostalgic over the past and anxious -- yet hopeful -- as to the future. I even read Eckhart Tolle's, "The Power of Now" (among other books) and reading that helped to remind me to be 'present' more. But now, I seem to have gotten myself onto a negative, 'getting nowhere' treadmill.

The situation that has been dragging on for years now is on top of other problems in my life that have also endured for years. Guess I'm the rabbit in the briar patch, eh? I've had enough of it all and would like some wellness, happiness and peace for a change -- would like to thrive instead of survive.

I really appreciate everyone's help here. I'm certainly going to strive to incorporate some of your suggestions! Thank you! I will look at that video on fear , "A human being" and no worries as to however long a video might be -- I always try to make time for things that are worth it! ;-)

For me, I think it's just a matter of getting back to where I was (mostly) for years. I've strayed from the path all too often for a while and it has become a pattern for me to do at this point. I'm finding it difficult break that pattern and to get back to 'walking my road' as I should be. And I'd like to -- more than anything. I think that once I manage to do that again and for long enough, things just might be going toward what is beautiful and serene again and myself along with them.

[John32241]

Hello,

Anxiety and worry tends to plage many of us. Learning how to manage our thought patterns is not easy.

The brain itself ia a worry machine. Yet we are required to work with the logical brain constantly. It will never want to surrender to some thing like intuition, however with the focus of your attention you can require it do that.

Since you do spells and rituals you do know how to focus your attention on some thing. So when concerns surface in your like that lead to anxiety and over thinking some circumatance, detach from that pattern by focusing your attention on some desirable outcome.

The intellect will want to know how to accomplish that result. Just tell it that you will find a way to make it happen. Then allow your inner wisdom to surface and comfort your logical thinking.

I hope that this very brief outline will be helpful.

John

[SierraNevadaStar]

Thanks so much, John, for the lovely, helpful and to-the-point post! I will do as you suggest!

[iamthat]

I sometimes think of the spiritual journey as like a wheel. We all begin at different points on the outer edge of the wheel and we are all heading towards the centre. So even if our paths may seem to be quite different, they are all leading towards the same point.

And really, that centre lies within each one of us. The more that we can rest in our centre, the more we naturally find that sense of detachment and acceptance.

Because the nature of the wheel is that the outer edge moves around but the centre is still. If we identify with the outer edge then we are caught up in all the movement. The closer we get to the centre, the less movement there is. When we rest in the centre then we abide in peace and stillness, observing the wheel spinning around us.

This comes with practice, but to get to that place of inner stillness we have to go through all the movement.

Peace.

[Clover]

“Don't look for peace. Don't look for any other state than the one you are in now; otherwise, you will set up inner conflict and unconscious resistance. Forgive yourself for not being at peace. The moment you completely accept your non-peace, your non-peace becomes transmuted into peace. Anything you accept fully will get you there, will take you into peace. This is the miracle of surrender”

― Eckhart Tolle

Surrender the edifice that got builded
mentally, is what you are surrendering.

I think that's
-a bandade.