Hope I understand the question.
My husband's half sister died a violent death, at age 16. I called the medium right away, and she said, she had an angelic spirit; that she had a contract to come here to help a dysfunctional family, until age 16. She was a spitfire, but I believed the medium, because I actually saw that side of her. Maybe it is someone in your family, that you never saw that side of them. Also, my one aunt was very plain, practical, and she came to me with curly hair, in flowers and feminine colors.
Maybe you need to find a reader who will tell you who it is?