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Old 20-02-2018, 06:38 PM
A human Being A human Being is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lorelyen
Very possibly, but here we're talking about a first date. "Why do you have such views?" Or why is your life like it is? etc., are to me a sign. Just a sign. Some penetrating questions may be justified - it really depends on the question and context hence some pondering may be needed.

Some questions basically let the date unroll. But if someone asked on a first date "How come you have no children?" My eyebrows would raise.
Was your comment about 'Why?' questions in relation to first dates specifically? Apologies if so, I thought you were speaking more generally - and yeah you're right, in that context I'd only speak about more personal subjects (as in the one the OP mentioned) if the other person broached the subject first.
Quote:
Sure, they are plenty of times when "Why?" and other questions seem appropriate but again, one doesn't want a first date to turn into as you say, an interrogation. I love it that people be as they are, their emotional quirks will show sooner or later... if you can read the signs! If it's shaped like a V I'd have a good laugh and give him extra Brownie points!

I mean, so much can be detected through changes in facial expression as the chat wanders here and there! Facial expression is the first thing to indicate emotional reactions, wired in as they are.
Ah now that's where we're different I guess, I'd go straight for the jugular - 'Why did you squeeze the ketchup such-wise? You've got daddy issues, haven't you? I demand answers, woman!' *bangs fists on the table*

No okay, I'm jesting, I agree that it's best to keep it light-hearted at first, be friendly, polite, respectful (and, in my case, utterly delightful - no I'm lying again :p). A lot depends on how open the two people are, I think, I'm not a big one for lengthy preliminaries and small-talk if I'm being honest.
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