I feel you've gotten some very good feedback in the posts above. I'll give you my opinion by relating my own experience. Among other things, you wrote:
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Dreamer_love
I don't know what to do, I've let her go as a lover but it would be difficult to let her go as a friend. I love her unconditionally but I know a relationship would not work because I feel like I have outgrown her spiritually and a relationship would be abusive to myself. I have cleaned my ''spiritual house'' and I am very much inspired on working on my personal goals, which is basically becoming a succesfull therapist and starting a family, I have been saving myself for the right person (which I haven't met yet). I hoped that in the future the friendship with my ex could be mature enough so that it wouldn't pose an issue for any new relationship, and I could keep her in my life. Maybe I am being too idealistic.
I think my presence in her life might be hurting her, or be damaging to her self esteem. She clearly hasn't resolved her deal of karma from our past. What should I do? Give her distance and time to grow?
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I was married to someone (I'm a guy, she was a woman) and we have a daughter. We split up due to her promiscuity, which she was open about at times, and secretive about at other times. I felt that clarity in the relationship was gone and trust had evaporated.
After our split, we both tried to be friends. She outright told me, at one point, that she wanted to get back together again. But this was a year and a half after our split - and I had gotten together with another woman who wanted openness and commitment. My ex got together with another guy and made a real effort at a committed relationship. They had a son. After some years, my ex had entered into another extra-marital affair, the result being she was dumped by the father of her new child.
In looking back, I've been glad I did not become re-involved with my ex, romantically or sexually. She was who she was, I was who I was, and we were different enough that it would just have been painful and frustrating. We each had lessons to learn - I don't leave myself out of that and can't really feel superior - but our lessons to be learned were different.