[TonySG]

Hi
I was just looking for some insights into my current experiences.

So I have suffered from terrible anxiety and negative thinking for most of my life. Nothing I have tried has been able to relieve me from this. Now, I have been on the spiritual journey for a few years. This year, however, I have experienced the most spiritual growth of my life. In meditation, I am now at the point where I am able to get into a 'no-self' state and be totally free of all and any identifications.

However, my negative thinking/anxiety usually pops up in this 'no self' state and pulls me out of it. My anxiety seems to be getting stronger the deeper the more I seem to awaken. I assume this is my ego trying to hang-on. But sometimes the anxiety feels unbearable. It is such a strange dynamic. On one hand, I am able to go really deep into myself and on the other, I am suffering the worst anxiety of my life. I think I am going to come to a breaking point soon where I will just have to let go of my ego. But something is keeping me clinging to it.

Has anyone been through a similar experience or have any advice on how to go about this? Thank you!