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Originally Posted by Ankhesenamun
I would be happy if I could just have a normal life, free of constant abuse and attacks, false allegations and me constantly having to consider where I can go at what time to minimize the risk of more attacks, free of being stalked, harassed, threatened, screamed at.
I would be happy if people that I have to interact with would respect me as a normal human being instead of treating me with contempt and then spreading malicious lies about me.
Just a normal life, that's what would make me happy. Sadly this is something I have never had.
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Its an illusion, you don't need any of that to be happy. None of those things have the power to deprive you of happiness unless you give them the power. It sounds like you have things pretty rough, I got dealt a hardcore hand of ****ed up too, you can use it all as a tool to liberate your consciousness. The way I do it is anchor myself in my body and let it all pass through me. Self inquiry practice, it becomes second nature. I recommend listening to Anthony de Mello audiobooks on youtube, this really helped me profoundly. A "normal" life isn't something you need to be happy. In this world its pretty normal to be miserable. You see people with what look like really good lives on the outside, but they are not happy. Then there's people with what look like really harsh and hard lives and they are happy on the inside. Things aren't what they seem on the surface. That Hindu sacred text the Bhagavagita, its set on a battlefield in the middle of a war. You might like this video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jS9V_A_0eQk