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Dear Des39
What you are saying is that you would like to cheat the test! That is why you dont know why! In your heart when you watch yourself in the mirror you see all your bad things and your good things. You just need to work in your bad things to turn all of them in good things!
Pse rember that you had past lives and today you are the results of all of them!
The big why you are here is you will be tested in order to prove that you can go for the next grade. In case you fail, dont worry, you will have another chance, you will have all the chances you need. In this context details are irrelevant, the past is in the past and nothing you can do will chage it, so turn the page and do your best!
Did you check the books from Allan Kardec? All what I say is from there! Take some time and find the pdf files in the internet, it is free download!
Good study!
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