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You seem to be talking about telepathic communication with his spirit?
I have found the harder we try to do this, the harder it can be, or we can get the words wrong. Relaxation is the key to telepathy like this.
One thing that might help is hovering at the border of sleep, if you can hover there and not fall asleep, but go into an "alpha" brainwave-state. After you have attuned to him, and feel a contact, you could try this?
Dreams also, may help him contact you.
But I also find the most meaningful messages are the empathetic ones. The ones where we can feel their emotions, and they receive ours. Great "conversations" can be held empathetically. That can tell us such a lot about their present state, and reinforce the bond of love.
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