1. Chuck Norris invented water.
2.Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
3.Death once had a near-Chuck Norris experience
4.When Graham Bell first invented telephone he had 2 missed calls from Chuck Norris.
5.Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch. HE decides what time it is.
Yes I copied and pasted these from other sites.
I'm too lazy to come up with any thing funny and
original right now :3
Tea is important.