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Originally Posted by CherryCherry
I've tried shrinks, I'm currently on anti depressants and have been for 2 years, I meditate and do yoga everyday, I am creative & paint/draw to help it, I watch funny things, I follow minimalist & Buddhist principles, I follow Law of Attraction, I've volunteered to help less fortunate, practice gratitude, have a close family relationship & even tell myself that I am healthy & there is nothing wrong.
It's all to no avail, how can I rid myself of this depression - I've had it for almost 10 years and I'm only 20! I really want to help myself & free myself. I know that I am so lucky to be given the gift of life but I'd rather give it to someone who wants it, as I would prefer not to be here.
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I'm 27 and I'm in the same boat as you, first depression at 10, currently still depressed all the time. I haven't taken medication in a year or more though, I've been trying to build my strength and ability to cope without medication. I understand your pain and I'm sorry you have to go through this.
I've been reading a little bit about severe depression lately and a lot of the information says around 30-35 range is when we are most likely to first experience life without depression. They say it's possible that we will have 1-2 more depressive episodes after that but for the most part life from ages 30-death is depression free.
I think about it like prison time. It's brutal, but it won't last forever. Look at prisoners, they are so hard, imagine how mentally hard we are going to be when we get out of this black cloud of depression. Practically immortal.
Also you are doing wayyy more than most. If 30 is just an average then I think your depression will lift faster. I've only been working hard to beat the depression for like a year or so. If 30-35 is some kind of time gate then no matter how much work we do we still won't be depression free until 30-35. That being said I feel like all the things you are doing is making life wayyy more enjoyable than not doing them. So even if they don't help you get depression free any faster they are still making life more enjoyable and making time seem to go by faster.