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I guess my whole issue being that often, communication is impossible and I don't know how to rectify it, because no matter which avenue I take, it seems to be detrimental to my 'spirituality'.
For example, I may express a thought, belief or a feeling out of some human need to do so, only to have another say "you're totally wrong about that" or "you're stupid if you believe that" or "that's not how it really is, you're delusional".
Now, there are a few ways I could go about this...I could defend my view/opinion as it relates to me, only to be 'stubborn', 'ignorant', 'closed-minded' or 'intolerant'.
I could ask them "what makes you say that?" or "could you please explain yourself?" only to get a reply like "if you can't see why you're totally wrong, then I cannot help you" or "I don't need to explain myself to you" or else just re-iterate their position without any further elaboration.
I could always just laugh and ignore them/walk away, but then I am back to being 'ignorant' and 'closed-minded' again and 'not willing to listen'.
There is a reason why ancient tribes had a 'talking stick'...but most people consider that idea totally ridiculous...I sarcastically wonder why...lol
...and so, no matter which way I go, communication is impossible because I am fully aware that I am comfortable with my own thoughts and views, and if I listened to everybody and took everybody's opinions and beliefs on-board as my own, the total contradiction between all of them would drive me totally insane, so I have to have boundaries...and unfortunately, many people don't know the difference between a 'boundary' and a 'closed mind'.
So, the only other option is silence...but then again, if I am going to start being silent, I won't be able to stop being silent because I haven't yet learned when to speak and when to shut up, so I would shut up all the time and just communicate by neanderthal grunts and monkey hand-gestures...and others would say "wow, that's great...I totally managed to shut that idiot up for good...look how amazing I am".
...and so, I stay in my 'cave' and don't venture out of it and have over half of SF on my 'ignore list' because I just cannot deal.
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