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Hello. I hope you do find someone who can help. I just wanted to respond to let you know that I have read your story and I am at least listening.
I also wanted to suggest that you also try to get some help with the drinking and clear the fog, so to speak. It will be difficult, but getting help for the drinking could be a good first step in trying to find some peace for everthing else. We use alcohol and drugs to numb our harsh realities and in the end they actually make things worse because you end up avoiding whatever the issue is and create more issues.
You sound like a good person because it takes selflessness to want so badly to help people despite being aware of what a mess this world is.
I hope you manage to get some help from the forum members. There are a lot of kind, wise and caring people here.
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