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Originally Posted by FairyCrystal
Thinking about that it makes me wonder why I am surrounded by people who treat me like ****. And now I realize the answer is likely: because I still haven't learnt the lesson to stand up for myself, and thus allow them to treat me this way.
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And... perhaps as well because you direct harsh judgment towards the people you are surrounded by. I read about your mother, and how horrible she is, and the horrible things she did. I read your comments about your narcissistic ex. And now you say your daughter is such and such, seemingly implying this is because of your ex. What I don't recall reading are self-reflective comments exploring how you've contributed to all this; taking responsibility for your actions and the part you played. Every bad relationship is made up of two people, each 50% responsible.
In your reply to me you wrote, "It is about healing the wounds she has caused inside me." That's it right there. Nobody can do anything to us. Nobody can hurt us. We however can empower people and allow them to hurt us, by feeling hurt. Feeling hurt allows us to blame others for our pain. And by shifting the blame to others, we don't have take any responsibility whatsoever for the unpleasant things that happen in our life.
And "standing up for myself" isn't really taking self-reflective responsibility. It's more just another way of making other people responsible... the idea that they did all this to you while you quietly sat back and did nothing. Standing up for yourself, from what I've read of your many posts, is the least of it. You are a very strong, opinionated individual. Strong to the point of "not a lot of flexibility" from what I can determine. It's that one-sided inflexibility I'd suggest might need some work and attention.