To the original poster:

I agree it seems quite possible that what you are experiencing is your own fear. When you meditate, you remove the surface protective layers of ego and sometimes are presented with genuine perceptions of yours to deal with. Dealing with fear is an important activity for consciousness. In your case, the thing you "need" may actually be to confront this fear. If it is a truly intense fear, even more the prompting for it to be confronted.

If you strongly fear damnation then the following sentence may not get through to you, but as a stranger on the internet I hope you will consider the following truth: you cannot be harmed. There is nothing truly to fear. Your consciousness is immutable. However, you ARE a creator. And you have been given this opportunity to experience some serious contrast and constraints here on Earth. That includes the possibility of you embracing a belief such as the belief that you may suffer endlessly! What a stark, constrasting belief! You have experienced the result of having such a belief- such a result can be experienced quite negatively. Now, in meditation, you seek to clear the debris- and that means addressing the belief.

The answer? It's personal for everyone... but often this works: Lovingly surrender. Embrace it. Surrender your fear, fully experience the emotion you have connected to it. The emotion, the fear, the pain cannot kill you. Fully experience the negative in the NOW without judgment. Don't tell yourself a story about it- just intend to fully be with the experience. It can't truly harm you. It may be emotionally or even physically painful- but that's just a sensation, one that cannot destroy you (though it might feel like it can).

Fully embracing- and surviving- such a great fear is a great opportunity for consciousness to grow indeed!

Finally, please know that YOU are loved beyond measure.