I think unselfish love, makes you feel good, it makes others feel good...there’s no expectation back...but the love and good feelings from others. Feeling good about yourself is not selfish, feeling bad about yourself and trying to fix it with material things, or bringing others down, or pretending you are strong, when you are not...is selfish.
I honestly, probably, have never felt self love...I love my children, and I feel no strings, or wanting something in return from them, when I love them. They are my children, they really can’t give me anything in return, but a smile, and their love back. I don’t worry about them talking **** about me, because I am able to freely feel love for them...somehow. Even when they talk ****, I still love them, and even laugh about it...because I did the same thing to my parents.
But, those two are the only ones in the world that can not break me, because I truly love them...I would have to love myself a lot more, and draw strength from that....to feel the same way about others.
That must be the same kind of love I should show myself.
I read one time, we can act nice, and try to love others....but good intentions are often punished(no good deed goes unpunished) if the feelings are not there. Example: I can be nice to you, out of manners....and want to be your friend out of loneliness, but to truly call you a friend, you would look passed my manners, and feel the energy I am sending you. I can not be a friend to you and make you feel trust, etc....if you do not feel that energy from me, even with good words and deeds. The simple fact, that I am not a friend to myself, and do not have the energy to share with you, would be a good example. When I am a good friend, because I feel good about myself, and love myself...then I can be a good friend....That is with love, self love.
People don’t remember the good deeds and nice words you have told them(but they always remember the bad) if you do not have the energy to go with it, because people remember how you make them feel, and that comes from your energy, not good manners, morals, or niceties.
If you have self love, you don’t have to say a word....someone could silently sit next to you...and still feel it. That’s self love.
I think self love is an energy....and that energy can start by saying....I’m not going to feel bad about myself today. I’m going to be me, take care of myself first, love myself first....(not with material things) and so I can love others and make them feel as good as I do. Self love comes from not denying yourself things that bring you happiness, that make you feel good, and not hiding away, so that others won’t be mean to you. Self love means all these things, and shining bright like The Sun....even in the face of adversity, jealousy, and hate....just by being your own self....with self love.
So I did not draw this last paragraph from anything higher, but myself. I am learning to love myself, I am intelligent, but my intelligence isn’t going to bring me self love....my spirit has to want that. I am learning self love now, today, right now.
So these are my own words...and I would love to hear from the rest of you....how do you self love yourself?