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I was trained fully by my guardians. That's why it was so hard. They were very thorough and they trained me very well. No human could have done that.
I did have someone to work with early on, or to practice with and be my guinea pig so to speak. He was sent for that purpose and he was very complicated inside and I had to try to fix that over and over and over until I got it right and then some other problem would spring up. That took 1 year. I thought I was supposed to fix him in one way, but that wasn't the plan. I did fix him in a way that he was more comfortable and able to function better. I did what I was supposed to do but I wasn't aware of the goal from the beginning. I learned through experience and from my guardians who will make me to a task over and over and over until I get it right.
It was confusing at first. I didn't know what was going on and I was very scared but they gave me enough evidence to show me that this was a real experience and not a hallucination. They would tell me what was about to happen, which I couldn't make up. I did remember my imaginary friends from when I was little and they were them. They showed me that they were always there, but their communication was subtle. I had dreams and I was very intuitive, and I knew things but I never made any connection to 'guidance'. or 'higher self' I kind of pretend believed in my 'friend's but not in any official way. I knew I wasn't crazy, but I was very frightened of having that be the outcome. It is tricky.
I had more then one initiation, and I had a physical deathly experience also.
I wouldn't recommend it. Yes it is a calling but you can leave the phone off the hook.
Just kidding, I don't think you can. I think there is a plan and if you don't go along with the plan then there is not an alternative. As I am told "You could do it the easy way, or you can do it the hard way, but you will do it"..so I do it the easy way because I tried it the hard way and that never works.
I know that initiation and training from within is a different experience then being trained by a human. It's the hard road. Of course ideally one would combine both methods. I have met other people who were fully trained from within and I can see some similarities but we are quirkier because we conform to our ways, not necessarily what is traditionally expected.
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