[Meiotribe]

Hey... I'm struggling. Not really, but kind of. I'm struggling so much I don't even know if I'm struggling or not

Seven years ago I found out about this celeb... I don't want this to be one of those dumbass posts that goes 'I think this celeb is my twinsoul' but it's gonna be one of those posts goddammit.

Before all this I wasn't much of a spiritual person... I believed in God and jesus but that was that. I also wasn't much of a fan of anyone and I never really bought into the whole celeb culture.

I'm not gonna describe the whole ordeal because it's the same as everyone's else's... Like, a spiritual awakening with my body vibrating, seeing things, et cetera. When I saw that celeb I felt like I was looking at my own soul, I'm not exaggerating, I felt like I was looking at my soul, but in human form, as if my soul wasnt in my body but had exited my body and became a human separate from me.

It wasn't just a familiar face or even like 'I know you from somewhere' but a 'I knew you since I started on this earth and I forgot about you but now you're staring right back at me' feeling, or I'd say knowing.

I was so frightened by this (and the whole awakening process, which has been recorded down in incredible detail in a recent post so I won't go through mine because it's the same as I reckon every awakening is) I thought the celeb was evil.

At one point I even thought this celeb was all my sins accumulated into one person. Bear in mind I haven't been exposed to spirituality at this point so I cant possibly have made all these feelings up. I also never thought much about modern celebrities because I was into books and my idea of a perfect person deserving of fame and money were basically authors and not singers and actors, so it's not like I go fan crazy every other day over every other famous person

Now fast forward seven years and... I'm not doing too well... Sometimes I feel like that experience was a bad thing because it made me wish for things I didn't know of and to be honest feels quite impossible. I've always wanted to be a famous author and that hasn't changed but as I grow older I see more obstacles than possibilities.

It's a new decade now and I want to close this chapter with some closure. I once went to a friend who's a trusted medium and she said that she tried to see behind the scenes for me but her angels blinded her with bright white light and told her that she wasn't suposoed to meddle in my affair because what went on with me was private.

I don't know where or what I'm getting at I think I just wanted to share my experience and know people's thoughts on it.

Also I'd like to know what I experienced when I saw this person, why I felt I was looking at my soul/future and past self... Is there another connection deeper and darker than a twin flame?