Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Gem
I find it hard to seperate how self aware I am with how well aware I am with others - maybe because to be present is to know what's going on with me right now. My awareness of others is also the awareness of how I am affected by them and it all comes down to the feeling I feel in such relating, but I'm not naturally talented at relating and forming the closeness or rapport. That is a skill I work on.
The meditation is great because it helps one see all things as an opportunity. For example, if things are pretty rough then it's an opportunity to practice keeping an even keel in a stormy sea... and if things are going great... then it's a reminder that it won;t last long, so you don't get too carried away. Hence the ups and the downs start to even out a little rather than going in wild swings.
A more deliberate practice can be purposeful in going to the subtler levels of experience, and as far as I'm concerned it should be for that purpose. Then you can be with the experience as it is, but in a more acute way, be aware of the finer nuances and intricacies of it... at the feel level. This translates to regular life enabling a deeper self-awareness. You can remember to retune to the balance of mind that is deliberate in formal meditation practice.
I'm not saying that it's all perfect and there is no stress, because life is stressful, and as long everything is pretty smooth sailing it seems easier to be 'spiritual-like'. When it gets tough it's harder to maintain the 'facade' and you become more the person you are, show your real face, so to speak. To me spiritualism is mostly just being. Being as you 'already are'. Then you can 'look and see' instead to trying to be some other way.
|
It’s through self awareness you begin to understand, full presence in self is really the reflection received through ‘others’, so in this way all separation falls away, when ‘staying present’ in yourself. So I understand, how it is for you, in this way.
Rapport and natural ability to be open and connect with people is a skill I’ve gained slowly from allowing myself to shift through barriers and walls I’ve had in myself. It’s through staying present it’s deepened as myself. In ending my own perceived seperation and wounds in this way, it’s now much easier to be open, warm and friendly to others. Even as the ‘other’ might have their own difficulties in this way, I still try to maintain my own. I think our ‘exposure’ to differences in others, brings about our own unified energies, so naturally people ‘feel’ comfortable in this way of our own being illuminated as such.
Nothings perfect and of course those subtler nuances is where I work on in myself to clear things out. I call these resisting points, where feeling or mind may still have some lingering threads in me. I observe closely, it might just be to clear out old sensations or just a momentary revisit to notice I’m in my head, not dropping into my whole being. Little things only, but I see them as great catalyst’s to transmute old remnants. I then notice I’m no longer attached next time and it’s that ease of flow in me that signals, I’ve cleared out what no longer needs to contain me. When I flow with everything moving outside me, I’m very conscious of that clarity in me, at peace, so relating settles into this.