Thank you very much Miss Hepburn for your excellent and kind post.
What you wrote about getting what we need is basically what I was alluding to by suggesting that I was on a spiritual abandonment path. There definitely appears to be some kind of humility lesson associated with it. It's constantly humbling and humiliating to be completely incapable of all the things I feel passionately compelled and intellectually over-equipped to do. e.g. When I wrote about being severely socially phobic everyone probably imagined someone sitting in a dark basement wearing a superman t-shirt surrounded by empty coke bottles. Whereas I actually look like someone you'd expect to be full of confidence. Very humiliating and leads to lots of "what the HECK's up with HIM?" responses from women.
So the next thing I'm trying to figure out then is, how much of our lives are we actually in control of through our thoughts and actions etc. and how much is "fate" determined by the circumstances we agreed to before we came here and the situations that are sent our way to test us? Possibly my next thread... but then I think I'll just get 99% answers telling me that our reality is completely controlled by our thoughts. Which I really don't agree with - the idea that the circumstances of my life are determined in any significant way by the random chatter of my scattered mind seems illogical and actually quite nihilistic to me.
Anyway, thanks for the bible passages - I like your idea and I will give it a go.
