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Originally Posted by Terra Tourist
Hi Robertj
I know you have your heart in the best place, but I'm just going to be the devil's advocate here for a moment...
If a person is displaying an 'unhealthy' need for approval, in your estimation, then you have already judged them to be (a) unhealthy (b) less than perfect in some way. Bottom line, you have judged them.
To add to that, praying for someone because you have judged them to be 'unhealthy' or less than perfect in some way is an action - albeit a passive aggressive action - but an action nonetheless to remedy their pre-judged imperfection.
We certainly can judge a person's behaviour to be unprofitable for your particular path, it's sensible to hold that power of discrimination, however, unless that person is causing you great harm, then perhaps it's best to accept your perceived differences and carry on with your journey. Their actions are relevant to their path. Perhaps their 'unhealthy' behaviour is a gift to you, to mirror back to you what you see flawed about yourself (?)...perhaps.
So, in general, it seems to be a sensible approach to be wise and discriminate towards certain behaviours, but perhaps it's not so wise to get too involved in another person's path.
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You go very deep.
There is broader perspective, from which everything is perfect, in which we just are and do not even think, so definitions are not needed to begin with. That's why being in the now feels so good - we connect to our essence and eternalness.
When we think though, we define, we think about our strategies and plan. So when we see a dramatic person, we define him or her as such and make decisions based on that, if we want to keep in touch with that person. If we feel disgusted or angry, then we judge, I think. When we make moral value decisions, then we judge. When we make decisions simply based on wanted/unwanted plane without reducing in our minds intrinsic value of that person, is that still judgment?